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Ain't none of this shit promised

@blunttqueen-blog

| 18 |
it is what it is
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I’m supposed to be getting over you. Everyone tells me it’s time. So why do I have such a hard time trying? Why do I still look for you in everywhere I go? Why do I wake up in the middle of the night and think ‘why is he not here beside me?“ Why do I look twice when I see a burgundy Chevy truck? Why do I check to see if it has stickers on the back? Why do I think of your eyes when I see the sky? Why does your name still give me butterflies? Why can’t I just give up you?

Why in the hell can’t I get over you? (via tvdshipping)

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Tell me that you miss me like the way I miss you. I miss the old us. I miss texting you for hours and hours about our lives. I miss sending you snaps of me singing and annoying the hell out of you. I miss talking to you about my little rants and problems. But I lost you. I lost you to a person that I don’t even think truly deserves you. It hurts distancing myself from you but what can I do? It bothers me that you’re with that person. But I do know that I can’t exactly tell you my feelings because I’m so fucking confused. I don’t know how to handle them and the questions in my head.
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1) I know it’s been months since the last time we talked, and maybe that’s both of our faults, but this silence is deadly and I’m scared it’s killing any chance of relationship we have left. 2) I’m so, so sorry for all the things I said to you after we broke up. I was in pain and I took it out on you. Believe me, I would take back every cruel word in a heartbeat. 3) I haven’t felt whole since the day you left and I’m terrified emptiness is all I’ll feel anymore. 4) I loved you so much more than I knew. And I think that’s part of the reason I didn’t appreciate you as much as I should have. I’m sorry I was too busy searching for stars to notice that the sun was right in front of me. 5) I miss you more than I’ve ever missed anyone before. I think about you constantly, and I can never get you off my mind. And even if I could, I don’t think I would want to.

5 things I should tell you (via stormyyskiess)

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It’s not always terrible but sometimes i still miss you and i’m so sorry that i do. I don’t mean to it’s just that every time i try to get involved with someone new i end up  crying myself to sleep because his kiss doesn’t feel the same as yours did and believe me, i don’t want to feel this way but i’m starting to think that i’ll never be able to give someone all of me ever again because you still have pieces of me that i’m still trying to figure out how to get back

His not you.. (via tonemerethe)

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Tell me that you miss me like the way I miss you. I miss the old us. I miss texting you for hours and hours about our lives. I miss sending you snaps of me singing and annoying the hell out of you. I miss talking to you about my little rants and problems. But I lost you. I lost you to a person that I don’t even think truly deserves you. It hurts distancing myself from you but what can I do? It bothers me that you’re with that person. But I do know that I can’t exactly tell you my feelings because I’m so fucking confused. I don’t know how to handle them and the questions in my head.
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savybabaay

I miss you. I miss your body being next to mine. I miss being tangled up with you while we slept. I miss laying my head on your chest and hearing your heart beat. I miss your touch. I miss your hands wrapped around my body. I miss you pulling me closer during the middle of the night. I miss how you fell asleep next to me - jerking and jumping a foot out of bed, scaring me half to death. I miss your snoring and your drooling. I miss waking up and you bring the first thing I see. I miss your morning kisses, our mid-day kisses, our goodbye kisses, our midnight kisses, our I missed you kisses, our I’m sorry kisses, our I love you kisses. I miss your reassuring forehead kisses. I miss your smile. I miss your laugh. I miss the way you look at me. I miss waking up in the morning and cooking my least favorite meal with you.

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reblogged
I promised you that I wouldn’t call And I promised myself that I’d be strong But for the first time In a long time I feel like promises Don’t mean anything They never did to you So why should they to me I don’t want to stoop to your Level of not dealing With things But I just can’t. Because no matter how Hard I try I cant forget about when we Danced outside And I felt safe for The first time It’s taking everything I’ve got to Stay away Cause I know that It’s not a problem for you I don’t want to talk About you with my friends With anybody Because it honestly Destroys me inside The worst part Is thinking about What could have been I’ve always wanted You and me And that’s what’s Killing me Slowly but surely… It has to get better Otherwise everything everyone Has been telling me is just Part of some procedure That will just make me Feel numb to you But maybe that’s for the better. But how is any of this For the better When I’m so fucking Miserable without you Yet miserable with This version of you That I don’t recognize The one that I always Have to apologize to When it’s not even my fault But I always take the blame Because that’s something You aren’t capable of That’s what love is though It’s about driving each other So mad that you just Want to grab their face And scream… But all that Comes out is a passionate Kiss that I’ve been longing For so long. That’s what’s killing me Though. That small, faint sliver That the person I thought you were Would come back And tell me that everything is fine And that even though everything Has changed at the same time It hasn’t But I know that I can’t Think like that anymore And I know that I have to Let go of you And everything I dreamed of For us. You just made it look So easy Like you unfell for me A long time ago And it just makes me Wonder if it was ever Real for you Because it was for me And I don’t know how To come to terms with The fact that you’re Just going to be a ghost And a stranger by choice. You never got to hear Me sing the song that Was my love for you So I guess that’s what this Is except it’s just all Of the things that I Never got to say. Things that I shouldn’t Be saying at all Because my head keeps Telling me it’s not worth it But my heart is crying For the look you Gave me when I told you My initials were like a silly Lunch meat And all I want is for You to remember how We were before our lives Got so flooded And how the way we consumed Each other wasn’t in the form Of a parasite But in the form of ham Because ham is good And so was my love

I loved you so much that I lost myself when you left (via aly-in-red)

This is so beautiful

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And then after a while of meeting new people, building yourself up and convincing yourself you’re fine, sadness hits you in the middle of a laugh. And you feel drained with the realization that you’ve never been more alone in your life.

what the fuck is wrong with me (via call-me-engler)

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And I know that only fools fall for you and maybe what people say is true that the two of us could never be since you’re from another galaxy But what if you and me would try since I can no longer deny that I am in love and don’t want to hide that you’re what I think about at night

// a 61 words poem j.d.m. (via poetryandthesea)

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Late Night Conversations With No One #13 ——————————- Mad Woman is available on Amazon through the link in my bio! ——————————- #poem #poet #prose #poetry #poetsofig #poetsofinstagram #write #writer #writersofig #writersofinstagram #instagood #instadaily #art #amazon #life #love #lovepoem #lovepoetry #truth #typewriter #dontbebasic #kentucky #louisville #madwoman #katsavage #thetragedyofindigoandjude

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I wish I was the one who let go first. It still pains me to see him with her, but I’m fine now. I just wish I was the one who found happiness first, so at least I can enjoy life on my own, like he’s enjoying it with her.

Or maybe I’ll find someone else. (via introvertedcreatures)

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I care about him so damn much, it’s killing me not knowing if he’s okay.

I fucking miss you (via haleyxoc)

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tullipsink
I hope you wake up one day in the middle of the night and roll over on the bed we first made love on and feel regret rise through your throat like a hot sour taste and all you can think about is “fuck, i should’ve tried for her

A.M.// I was worth it, but you didn’t see that. (via tullipsink)

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What you need to know about loving her: 1) She only knows destruction. She was born into a faulty foundation, and watched her parents love crumble into nothing. Forgive her for trying to blow your love apart.  2) She knows pain a little too well, and some days it tries to kill her. Let her breathe; let her heal. 3) She is a fighter. She’ll tear a hole into your heart to protect hers; but don’t let her off easy. Let her know you hurt too, and you only yell so loud because you care so much. 4) She has a hard time loving herself, and some days she will be in a bad mood because her physical appearance doesn’t seem good enough for her. Reassure her of her beauty, but do not force her to see it. 5) She has a tendency to drown her sorrows in alcohol and sad songs; let her be. If the radio is on just a little too loud, do not turn it down, it drowns out the demons; it makes her feel something. 6) She has seen the darkness of the world, but that is not the only thing her soul holds. She describes the world in beautiful words, and she paints those beautiful scenes onto her bedroom wall; and onto her skin. She’ll take you on an adventure in the middle of a blizzard; because the best time to be alive, is when everyone else is hiding. 7) She is what holds the world together, and what tears it apart. So if you ever get the pleasure to love someone like her, love her gently, but love her with fire.