i can't believe "the very touch of you corrupts" is from supernatural

god is hiding in between the pages of your favorite book that you haven't read yet and when you're done god will hide in another

My latest sticker sheet, which of these do you relate to?

(A few of these remaining!)

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people on here are always saying “we NEED a story where the art of storytelling is abandoned” like ugh literary devices are soo annoying like that wouldn’t happen in real life that only happened to further the story (why is there story in my story) why would orpheus turn around when he was explicitly told not to why would icarus fly so close to the sun romeo&juliet catcher in the rye why are they so earnest why pour your heart and soul into anything why bother why cant all art be quippy logical monotony like my marvel movies there’s a void in my heart bc i refused to fill it and the curtains were blue

“i hate poetry its so pretentious” but then you reblog a quote or a throwaway line and say “why does this go so hard” you are desperate for poetry you are starved for it and u dont even realise you’re hungry

If Beale Street Could Talk, James Baldwin

people today with access to more raw information than any other period: the earth is flat

german artilleryman in 1916, who barely washes his own ass: I need to account for the curvature and rotation of the earth when plotting my firing plans

Eratosthenes, an Egyptian, in 3750 BC when fucking mammoths hadn’t even gone extinct yet: Oh hey I can use these two obelisks to calculate the earth’s entire circumference based on the length of their shadows and the Earth’s curvature. Neat.

Erastothenes was born in 276 BCE.

The last mammoth died on in island off the northeast coast of Siberia in ~1650BCE.

And as I’ve pointed out previously, the Coriolis effect was known even earlier than that, although it may not have become important to gunnery.

I find it utterly bizarre that humans saw these megafauna.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/02/science/woolly-mammoth-extinct-genetics.html “ In fact, the Wrangel mammoth’s genome carried so many detrimental mutations that the population had suffered a “genomic meltdown,” according to Rebekah Rogers and Montgomery Slatkin of the University of California, Berkeley. Analyzing the Swedish team’s mammoth data at the gene level, they found that many genes had accumulated mutations that would have halted synthesis of proteins before they were complete, making the proteins useless, they report Thursday in PLOS Genetics. “ That “genomic meltdown” is one of the reasons feminism is so potentially lethal, because they keep pushing for asexual reproduction, or trying to combine ovaries, when the most likely outcome is a population running about - unable to reproduce sexually since the whole “male genocide” bit - with incredibly damaged chromosomes. Sex exists for a reason, and no, “because it’s fun” is not the answer, sorry. It works better than reproduction otherwise. Which is why every complex species uses it. Intelligence requires a lot of things to be working correctly, and if you have an all female species that is over the tipping point of idiocy, then there won’t be enough people to maintain the technology to continue to reproduce. And humans will go the way of the Wrangel beasties. Fortunately, feminists are horribly lazy bastards, so i doubt they’ll continue to get their way, but it does made for a decent plot for a dystopian fiction…

What …the fuck?

That went off the rails so suddenly like I thought I was just gonna learn something cool about mammoths and then WHOA.

I scrolled past this thinking “the earth is round, yes, something, something, mammoths…’ 

But the second time it came past I saw 

And I think I got whiplash from that pivot. I also laughed so hard that I couldn’t breathe. 

I’m????

Point and laugh at the MRA, kids. 

How … does he think … mammoths reproduced …

Never mind, not sure I want to know.

reblog to support Mammoth Feminism,

ignore for G E N O M I C M E L T D O W N

I here af for my Feminist Mammoth ladies, bring the species back!

DOWN WITH GENOMIC MELTDOWN

I… what exactly is combining ovaries supposed to achieve? 400 lazy feminist babies at the same time?

Shhhh…you weren’t supposed to tell anyone.

FEMINISM KILLED THE MAMMOTHS

I feel like we’re getting away from the main point here, which is that the world is flat

the world is only flat because it was trampled by feminist mammoths

reblog if you support your army of genetically-melted feminist mammoths that trampled the earth flat

Don’t anybody tell this guy about that species of lizard where there are only females it might break him

My head hurts after reading that. 

I’m sending this post to @wehuntedthemammoth

Why would you hurt me like this?

I teach genetics, I don’t deserve to have to explain why this is so wrong and yet. Oh my god. 

I reblogged this before but I have to do so again because of the above takedown with its glorious insults. Also, it’s always fun to point and laugh at MRAs.

I am in awe.

“Mueller’s Ratchet kind of presupposes that going in and manually editing a genome isn’t a fucking option, shitwad!” and “you pathetic snailsucking weed in the garden of knowledge” are honestly awe-inspiring and I’m fucking blessed I read them today

This is beautiful

It’s been long enough since I last saw this post that I’d nearly forgotten and it still fucking hit me like a goddamn freight train.

Fucking poetry there, Shakespeare would be hard pressed to improve upon these lines.

@shitpostsampler The snailsucking jellyfish fellator quote is golden.

Are we just going to ignore “a crumbling, confused pile of enraged starfish”?

‘oh hey that’s funny :D man, flat-earth sure is one of the stranger conspiracy theories isn’t it. ooh who was Eratosthenes? i should look him up! and now we’re talking about mammoths,  cool , i love mam

“a crumbling, confused pile of enraged starfish”

now this… this is a post on tumblr dot com

i’m still sad Eratosthenes missed out on the mammoths by like >< much

Look, if I had to read the words “ There are zero feminists pushing for parthenogenesis for humans ,” so do you.

Actually, they’re lovely words. Truth is beauty. But what a world where they need to be actually said…

literally though if you feel like your life is slipping through your fingers and every day goes too fast… try doing hard things, not just taking the easy route, like reading and making art and exercising and cooking a meal from scratch and journaling, doing these things without distraction, without being absorbed on a screen… the time will stretch and you’ll be reminded that life is long and beautiful if you make it so.

Not only was the performance done on 20 minutes notice, she had no rehearsal and simply heard Pavarotti’s rehearsal once on a goddamn tape player and just listened, nodded and said she could do it. the most famous opera song in the world, on one of the biggest nights for music in the world, no rehearsal, and she just went out and did it.

that’s talent

WHERE IS THE REST I NEED IT.

More backstory: she’d performed Nessun Dorma at another event two days before, but got asked to take Pavarotti’s slot and basically instantly accepted— WHICH HAPPENED AFTER THE SHOW HAD ALREADY STARTED. (The producer didn’t hear he wasn’t coming until about 1:50 before he was supposed to be onstage.) She got a recording of Pavarotti practicing, and got to sit with his conductor and rehearse until it was time for her performance (the originally scheduled one) and for a bit of time afterwards. She didn’t know that there was a 30-strong backing choir or 50-piece orchestra till she saw it on her way down. What a queen.

Link: An interview with the producer of the show.

And the rest of the performance: https://youtube.com/watch?v=aArVxjh_s7I

Monica Byrne

Tell me a soft memory

we would find out later i had burned off my entire cornea - about 65% of my eye. my doctor told me it is the organ with the highest concentration of nerve endings - i was in an amount of pain that can't be spoken.

and i was blind. for the first time in my life, i was totally blind. i kept thinking about reading, about writing. weirdly, just once, about driving. we had no idea if i would ever see again. just like that - my entire life was different.

it is a strange place to reference for a soft memory, to begin here.

my siblings were taking excellent care of me, but there was a moment in the hospital where, just through bad luck and timing - both of them had to step away for a moment. i was crying at that point; not emotionally. for 3 days after this i would still be crying, my tears, like a mermaid's, a frothy pink with blood.

my brother worried about leaving me. he had another, just-as-bad emergency.

"i got her," someone said. "don't worry."

a soft hand held mine, and then she started talking.

her name was jess. she has a wife named clyde. they live a few blocks up the street. clyde fell down, but the x-rays seem to be coming back better than expected. jess says she's got long dark hair and "more wrinkles than an elephant". jess describes every chair in the room and every person. she talks about her two kids and her cats and her favorite memories from college.

a doctor came. i had to switch to a different waiting room. i tried to stand up to follow the voice - i found jess's hand, following me. she didn't let go. she kept talking the whole way: lamp to your left, just a few more steps, okay to your right is the ugliest painting, good, now a little more walking straight, you got it baby

in the new silence of the next room she sat me down and called my brother for me, telling him where we'd gone to. and she stayed there for a bit, just chatting, her voice echoing in the eerie quiet. gently describing the room to me. and then someone was rude. from the sound of the voice, a kid, i think.

"why is she crying?"

"she just lost her vision," jess said. "she can't see."

"oh." said the kid. "that's scary."

the kid tells me he is here because he has peas stuck up his nose. that makes me laugh, his mom (?) groans. she tells me about the kid (he's 6, he likes paw patrol and eating cheese), about herself, about moving from cali.

jess says she's sorry, but she has to leave now, she's gotta go check on her wife.

"don't worry," says the mom. "i got her." and then i felt her hand press into mine.

for hours like that: i am taken care of by strangers. each person just talking with whatever comes to their head - not for any reward or celebrity or real reason, i guess. just because i am scared and alone and in the hospital and blinded and need to be distracted. not everyone even got told the story - they would just pick up in the silence with - oh by the way the television is playing HGTV - do you like that kind of a thing? yeah, me too, but could never quite get into those open-floor plans, i'll tell you -

by the time my brother is able to come back, the room is buzzing. we talk to each other like old friends, laughing, cracking jokes about if you don't like hospital food wait until you get on an airplane and can't believe i'm up past two in the morning what a party animal i'm becoming. i am holding the hands of someone named drew, who likes my crow tattoo and making crochet snails.

there are many dark moments full of pain in this world. this - in the low of absolute-dark, absolute-pain: people find a way to paint in it anyway. the color splash of their voices: this triumphant, radiating kindness of - let's be here together, let me help you, let's keep going.

i never saw their faces. i can't remember many of their names. but i think about them often, and the way we all took a deep breath - and did something gentle amongst the pain.

excerpt from leonard cohen's 1966 novel beautiful losers, from which buffy sainte marie adapted into her phenomenal song god is alive, magic is afoot 

btw it's fantasy, you really don't need to worry about your world map making "sense" geologically or whatever. make that river flow backwards from the sea into the mountain.

Wait are you saying I don't have to take plate tectonics ocean currents and mineral deposition into account when I make this map? But how will I know where the mountains with gold mines are, or what shores would have the best fishing spots? If I don't map out this entire world in intricate detail, how will I know if this kingdom falls on a major trade route or is sidelined to the periphery of the classical empires?

TOLKIEN SPOTTED!!! C.S., OBLITERATE!!!!!!

(Source)

Bruce Springsteen

See, I don't think that the Pevensie kids were uncanny and dangerous upon returning to England so much as just like. Cool weirdos.

Lucy talks to animals sometimes. She doesn't expect responses or anything; it has the same energy as a person talking to their dog, except it's the squirrel she spotted on the quad or the racoon in the garbage. But she's super friendly in general so after the initial "what the heck" everyone shrugs it off because like, yeah, of course she does. She also went with me to a scary doctor's appointment having known me for like five minutes and gave me an incredible pep talk. She's cool like that.

Peter joins the fencing club and day one it's like he's never held a foil in his life and day two he loses to a kid half his size but then after like a month and a half he just absolutely annihilates the instructor. But he's super humble about it and afterwards he helps everyone else out without being condescending at all. And while it's a little weird that he's just Suddenly an expert, people are like, "he's a fast learner, that's cool." He's really industrious in class too, just Peter being Peter. He probably practiced a whole bunch after hours.

Edmund gets extremely weird food cravings sometimes, like "wow, I could really go for chicken liver with raisins right about now" or "you guys know what's great? Gooseberry trifles." And his friends say, "I've never heard of that before but it sounds weird." So Edmund learns to cook and starts making all these vaguely antiquated fancy dishes with weird berries and organ meats and things and shares them around during study breaks and everyone's like "Yo! Pevensie brought food. Cool, thanks Pevensie." And he shares it with everyone, even the kids nobody likes, and it kinda brings people together.

Susan, who was always the Mom Friend, seems to have gotten a power-up because now she Everyone's mom and weirdly people actually listen to her? But she only uses those powers for good. Girl in her dorm not eating enough? Susan's here with snacks and look at that now she's eating. Those guys arguing look like they're about to throw down? Susan says "knock it off" and glares and they do. And her friends are like, "how do you do it???" and she says "You just have to act like you expect to be obeyed." It's very cool, though it can be a bit Much sometimes.

And they're all into mythology now? Like ancient Rome and King Arthur and stuff? That's kinda weird, but not off-putting; lots of kids have mythology phases. And Peter named the tree outside his dorm, but everyone kinda laughs and says "yeah okay." Edmund is adamantly anti-bullying now, it's nice. Susan and Lucy wear a lot of lion-themed jewelry and people definitely Notice, but that just means that they start getting more of it for Christmas/birthdays.

And of course whenever two or more of them are together it's like they've got a conspiracy going on. They're always fervently whispering back and forth, giggling an the million inside jokes they've got, giving each other Looks. And onlookers are mostly just like, "Man, it's cool that those Pevensie kids are all so tight; I wish I was that close with my siblings."

Andrew Garfield, in an interview with GQ

sorry for being so weird it's my first time being alive

NOT sorry for being so weird it’s my ONLY time being alive

you can do whatever you want forever

hell yes. realest shit ever said

one of the best things to happen in the last few years is william shatner going to space and having a ninth configuration moment while a glassy-eyed jeff bezos pops champagne