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Who was left?

@blogfellout

Blog and Reblog were in a boat...
(Top-quality Tumblr nonsense, queued to post at least twice daily. Technically a “side-blog” of frangiblekilljoy.tumblr.com )
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i love how theres no rules for pronouncing words in English, you literally just have to learn and hear someone say every single word

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3liza

if anyone is wondering why this is, it's because they stopped teaching American children (and many British) the rules (which exist, and have been standardized and written down for centuries) sometime at the turn of the 21st century. if you are gen x or older, have English degree-holding parents, and/or had any really old teachers who were still teaching into the "fuck grammar" era of public schooling, you unlock a special level of English comprehension where you can pronounce 99% of words perfectly without ever hearing them at all, as well as the ability to code switch to a higher-"class" dialect of English at will, which is extremely important for any social interaction where you have to deal with people who are judging you for such a thing, which happens a lot more often than you're aware of unless someone has already told you about it. usually no one tells you about it unless they're teaching it.

there were a lot of reasons for the shift, most of them can be blamed on Reagan and Thatcher (like everything else). it was pushed through to school curriculums and popular culture as a "de-snobbification" of english education where everyone's regional and ethnic accents would be normalized and accepted, what actually happened is that language gaps between rich and poor kids was crowbarred farther apart as you could no longer learn to talk, write, or read fancy in a free public school, leaving only the wealthy kids who got tutors and private schools and educated parents with a formal English education able to choose to code switch or to struggle considerably less in college when professors usually start expecting you to know grammar and etymology already and don't think it's their job to fix your high school teacher's fuckups. (it is, but that's a different post)

this is why almost everyone on YouTube is speaking only approximate English (see the #youtube grammar tag) a lot of the time and one of the big reasons people with average hearing and reading and processing function have started needing subtitles a lot more in the past ten years, when they didn't before

this gets brought up on Tumblr a lot, see prior discourse about cursive not being taught anymore (not actually a good thing, prevents you from reading anything handwritten before 1990, bad for handwriting ergonomics especially for hypermobile people [see: why do so many hypermobile and autistic people get into fountain pens]) and the new yorker article about "vibes based literacy".

anyway the lesson here is every time the education establishment announces they are about to make education "less formal" and that this will benefit "everyone", because hooray we all thought learning cursive and sentence diagramming and Greek word roots was boring, right? what they are actually announcing is that you will still be judged for not being able to use those formal skills, but now only rich people will be able to learn them from tutors as basic education becomes increasingly privatized.

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bourtange

specifically on the topic of pronouncing words, a conlang nerd sat down and brute-force compiled a numbered list of rules for correctly pronouncing english words that gets it right for nearly every word 23 years ago (the date explains why his phonetic transcription is so weird, sorry)

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I think the best most human thing in the world is strangers doing a silly thing together

Examples:

- guy at work "Yes, and -" ing the bit me and my coworker were doing where we pretended to be owners of a fantasy medieval tavern not minimum wage retail staff

- at the gay club when Die Young by Kesha came on and two hundred people, all dancing and drinking separately, jumped up and down to make the "- beat of the drums *STOMP STOMP*" as loud as possible

- person who watched me stomp round the beach singing a made up song about breakfast foods to name a cat after and suggested more breakfast foods that would be good cat names

- guy who started a dance off with everyone across the road while waiting for the lights to change

- very tiny girl at the pharmacy interviewing everyone in the queue and every single one of us in turn sat down and answered this toddler's questions like we were on Letterman

The three pillars of humanity, in no particular order, are Joy, Absurdity, and Sharing

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self isolating to cope is great until you look up one day and years have passed and you realise no one knew you when you were 18 or 19 or 20 or 21 and now they never will

the great thing about un-isolating yourself is that you can literally start making friends whenever you want, and most people will continue to do so through the rest of their lives. you will meet new people at 28 and 37 and 43 and 56 and 61 and 72 and 85 and 94 who will love you.

you will spend the rest of your life meeting people who will love you.

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reblogged

she got those Tom Lehrer vibes

[Video Description: extended tiktok/video by fettuccinefettuqueen. Multiple camera views and qualities are shown. Gabbi Bolt, a feminine musical comedian wearing a bright floral shirt, earrings, and bandana, plays a keyboard and sings under pink and blue lights on a small stage. She sings and plays a song (lyrics below). It begins slowly. Every time the Aus police are mentioned, the song gets faster and goes up a key. By the end, she is singing and playing very quickly. It ends with a flourish and applause.

Lyrics: A kindergarten teacher would only have up to F. When they looked at their curriculum to teach the alphabet. A surgeon would not yet have even touch a surgery. But 6 months, Yep, that's all it takes to join the Aus police. A lawyer would be juggling 4 subjects on their feet, when on average there are 38 - right? - subjects to complete. They cannot yet defend, object or bargain for a plea, but meanwhile you can make arrests when you're the Aus police. Seem fair! A first time mum is still too busy cooking up a kid. A first time architect is still drawing up a blueprint. A first time taxidermist is still fucking creepy so is the fact that in 6 months you can join the Aus police. A retail worker would still have a skerrick of their soul. The West Coast Eagles still would not have scored a single goal. Michelle has not been introduced as Child of Destiny but you can lock up kids when you work for Aus Police. The age of criminal responsibility in this country is 10. When I was 10, I couldn't even spell criminal. A politician would've only fucked up 40 times and for every fuck up made, they would have told bout 40 lies. A Telstra support worker still has not got back to me but I would not have this problem if I worked for Aus police. Hands up Tesltra! It's a raid! Fa La La La La La La La La La Firearms Mililililili Military Complex Li li li li li li li li little tiny boots! Haha! ay ay ay ay ay. All the people I know that went into this career were annoying at best ... and horrifying at worst. A learner driver would still be making their mum go *pffftt*. An office worker still has not worked up two weeks in lieu. A musical comedian just has this melody. But 6 months, Yep, that's all it takes to own a gun and make arrests and join the Aus police.

End Description.]

I shared this with everyone I knew on tiktok when I first saw it, this is phenomenal and my favorite

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Hey you know how I said I was going to make a workbook on the kind of bullshit you need to do when someone you love dies? I actually did that.

Featuring Helpful Sections such as:

  • Death Certificates – What you need, why you need them, and how to get them
  • Prepare to spend a long and miserable time on the phone
  • What the Everloving Fuck is Probate
  • Some Simple Dos and Don’ts
  • Shitty Mad Libs – Templates for writing Obituaries and Memorials
  • How to plan a non-religious death party
  • So you suddenly have to become some sort of hacker or some shit

This is an eighteen page book that you can print out, download, share, and give away; it is meant to be used to collect information about funeral planning and account management after a death OR you can use it BEFORE you die and give people information so they’re not stuck playing Nancy Fucking Drew while trying to keep seventeen cousins who crawled out of the woodwork from gutting each other in front of the fucking casket as they argue about who’s inheriting grandma’s favorite dentures.

It’s not exactly cheerful and it’s full of things that are probably going to feel really fucking raw if you’re processing a fresh death.

I’m sorry! I love you! Death is shitty! I’m trying to laugh about it a little and I hope you can laugh a little too because otherwise we’re all just going to cry together.

Good luck!

(in memory of my weirdo mother and her weirdo siblings who all died too fucking young and left me holding this flaming bag of dogshit)

Death sucks, hope you’re doing okay out there.

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Another thing the Barbie movie made me realize is how many movies "made for men" I've watched with some guys friends of mine (like Fast and Furious).

I go to the cinema, watch the movie, happily listen to their thoughts about it and say I enjoyed my time. I ignore how bad the story may have been and enjoy my time because he is enjoying his time.

But when it comes to a movie to which I emotionally connect so deeply as I did to Barbie, I don't see the same effort coming from them to understand why I or any of our girl friends enjoyed our time wearing pink and watching a movie about a doll.

Just a thought that occurred me

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i think the difference between the barbie's treatment of ken's in barbieland vs the ken's treatment of barbie's in kendom can be summed up pretty easily actually:

barbie's ignored ken, realistically they were given an opportunity to have their own lives and do what they wanted and they didn't do it. everything revolved around their barbie's, ken would only have a good day if barbie did or if barbie acknowledged him. they never tried to do anything they genuinely wanted to.

whereas when the ken's took over, they brainwashed the barbie's into liking them and doing things for them. they would bring them beers and act like waitresses, give them foot massages or watch films they otherwise wouldn't be interested in. they became mindless and existed to serve the ken's. they were no longer just friends with the barbie's, they didn't want barbie to love them back, they wanted to own them.

people talking about ken falling down the patriarchy pipeline out of neglect or loneliness but why couldn't the ken's form friendships and communities like the barbie's did? why is it up to barbie to ensure that ken doesn't feel that way? at what point is it acceptable to blame barbie for ken's feelings? barbie let ken come to her party, watched him beach, held him whilst he went to the hospital, agreed to let him go on her journey, says hi to him when she sees him, things friends do and things she's shown doing with all the other barbie's, but if he still feels loneliness after that because she doesn't want to kiss him or doesn't love him back, why is that barbie's fault? meanwhile the entire time ken is ignoring other ken's out of his fixation on barbie and is even trying to "beach" other ken's off and causing problems with other ken's to gain barbie's attention

to me it's the perfect representation of the real world in the sense that women will leave men alone, men will want to own women, and women will be blamed for men's neglect and loneliness but it's a paper cage they create for themselves because they refuse to see women as individuals and arguably they don't actively try to create and nurture communities in the same way women do. ken's story is sad yes, but it's a story of his own design and what makes it worse is that he blames barbie for it. not himself, not mattel, no the real world but barbie, who's friendly disinterest in him means that she should be the one who is blamed and punished

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I don't know; I kind of think that our culture is based around systematic denial of human limitations. I mean, there's the eight-hour work day (which is about 4 hours longer than most people are consistently able to remain productive); buffing your qualifications on job applications (which everyone needs to do to some extent, because everyone else is doing it); the expectation of multitasking, even though it's not really possible; academics are running around with impostor syndrome, ultimately because there's only so many books that an individual is capable of reading, while a bunch of liars and grifters pretend that they're experts at *everything* and are held up as thought leaders. Billionaires are held up as if they're just incredibly hard workers, photoshopped movie stars held up as if they're just incredibly beautiful. We feel guilty for not being something that never has and can never exist.

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Thinking about this conversation from Discord

Now see, this really pisses me off (the “kids are resilient” thing, not your response to it) because there has been study after study about what actually happens!!!

If the kid receives support during/after the traumatic event, they get stronger.

If the kid does not receive support during/after the traumatic event, they get fucked up.

True resilience in kids has ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS been the result of the support they receive.

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Shout out to trans women who aren’t computer scientists or musicians or avant-garde artists or whatever.

Shout-out to tgirls who work at Taco Bell. Thank u queen, society would collapse without you

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snkrfnd

Over twenty years ago my big brother got me a job at a Taco Bell in the St. Louis suburbs-West County. He warned me that it was the “gay Taco Bell”, but since I was coming from the “gay Howard Johnson’s” I wasn’t shocked. It turns out it was the black trans women Taco Bell complete with black trans women in management. And they’d worked out an arrangement with the local teen Narcotics Anonymous group so that twice a week we would shut down the drive thru and the dining room and exclusively serve 60+ teens in various stages of recovery. And many of the women I worked with were in various stages of being out or transitioning and they were from all generations from teens to over 50. One woman I worked with had a regular corporate job presenting as a man 9-5 Mon-Fri and then came to Taco Bell and worked 6pm -2am Friday and Saturday night so she could be herself surrounded by other black transwomen in those stolen weekends. And we had customers come from all over the metro area because they knew they could be themselves in the dining room. I only worked there from 1999-2001 but for young me, this was a vital, formative experience. Some of the girls came from north city all the way out to the “gay Taco Bell” on Manchester in west county because they heard it was safe to work there. Like- I know times have changed but they haven’t changed much in 20 years. I’m still convinced that for lgbt youth, finding a job at your city’s version of the “gay Taco Bell” is key to survival.

Thank u for sharing this with us