The Garfield strip published on 9/11/2001 unintentionally feels like Garfield did 9/11.
pretty sexy of me to keep going despite each day being more unbearable than the last
I didn't have a vase, so I used an empty container of Costco peanut butter pretzels. Funnily enough, the flowers were also from Costco!
Forget what you know about life. Life is about taking little snacks up to ur room and eating them on ur little bed
hey guys don't watch shakespeare's new play hamlet. it's super heckin' problematic and glorifies killing your family members. the bard knew exactly what he was doing and i hope he can sleep at night knowing he's exposed many impressionable viewers to graphic violence, slutshaming (gross!) and depictions of theatre kids. dni if you think this is ok btw
You have been in suspension for 9999999-
It's always "good news. I figured out what that thing you just incinerated did" and never "i must say, though, that since you went through all the trouble of waking me up, you must really, really love to test. I love it too" or "but the important thing is you're back. With me. And now I'm onto all your little tricks. So there's nothing to stop us from testing for the rest of your life" 🙄🙄🙄
Something that I think Steven Universe did that was really funny and underappreciated was titling their lighter filler episodes like "Mega-Diamonds: Shit Gets Real" and then their plot heavy episodes like "Lion Goes to the Beach :)"
#there was an episode called hit the diamond#fandom was loaded with theories before it aired#and it was about baseball
Oh people had countdowns to the dramatically titled episodes specifically and it was wrong every time. "Oh maybe this time it'll be heavy and plot relevant for real" they'd say, and they'd be treated to a cute no-stakes episode about getting pizza. Meanwhile some episode titled some shit like "Barnyard Hijinks" that people wrote off as skippable would have a major plot twist reveal.
The people who are still mad about this add humor value to this bit the showrunners pulled.
glados is the best robot because she is also a petty bitch who’s really bad at lying
cell phone doesn't like water because it is a combination of the other three elements. it is a rock (earth) that we fill with lightning (fire) that can control radio waves (air). if it contained water too, it would be too perfect; it would be like a god. to prevent this, the universe kills the would be uniter-of-the-elements. it's basic science.
TBH THIS...YIPPEE THAT...YOURE FORGETTING THE ORIGINAL AUTISM ICON.
for the low low price of reading a single poem you too can feel entirely alienated from everyone within your physical reach & yet completely connected to the unchangable truth of shared human experience
(flight intercom) this is the pilot speaking. yeah we expect todays flight to be normal. um if you look out your window you shouldnt see the skull
(wizard intercom) good evening passengers. this is the wizard speaking. boy do i have a treat for you
Posts that make you drop everything you're doing and open Audacity
for a safer and cheaper alternative to getting a piercing at claire's, you can always try getting caught and tagged by a team of researchers before being released back into the wild
Anonymous asked:
you just hate the cis because of the things that they did
I hate the cis because it is led by the treacherous count dooku
hate microsoft word always trying to make my writing more concise. maybe i WANT to be a little flowery.
I don't think we bully linux people enough on here
linux users focusing way too hard on the "processor" part of "word processor"
whoever decided to turn daisy bell into a spooky dookie creepypasta song is fucking evil. that computer was brave enough to sing us a delightful little song and you do THIS to him? thats hatsune mikus grandpa dude. fuck you
Miku family reunion
