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This blog is a safe space for people of all ages, races, and beliefs to ask for guidance or simply vent. Follow for daily graphics, motivational quotes, and gentle reminders!
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kayleebitesback

Supporting Someone with an ED

It can be so difficult to know how to support someone suffering from an eating disorder. I’ve compiled a bit of a list of ideas that help me, and that might therefore help others, to give people some ideas and assist them in reducing the feeling that they are ‘helpless’.

  • Get them out of the house or around company, even if it’s just to run errands or study together. This gets them out of their head and into things that are productive and not centred around food (and being productive means there is inherent value in your actions – important).
  • Let them know when something they say is disordered. It can be really hard to differentiate between one’s own thoughts and disordered thoughts at times, so it is helpful to have someone say hey that’s the ED talking.
  • Reminders that: how they feel is temporary and will pass, they deserve and need to eat, their value is not dependant on weight, they need to recover to achieve all the dreams they have for their lives, they have survived all of their worst days thus far etc.
  • Message them when you’re eating and remind them that it’s a meal time and they must eat because their body needs it.
  • Call them! You don’t have to talk about how you/they are feeling in life, but even just hearing what people are up to and talking about the good things in your week and yarning about the latest life dramas can be really calming and distracting because it feels so ‘normal’.
  • Talk their thoughts through with them. This one is pretty intense so never feel obliged to do it, but sometimes taking the thing you are worried about and (metaphorically) showing it to someone else helps you put that worry into perspective in terms of importance and realistically look at how you can tackle it.
  • Get them talking about something they are passionate about to flood their mind with something so positive!
  • Steer conversations to a new topic when others start talking about diets/weight loss/other things that are likely to be very triggering.

Please let me know if you have any other suggestions! 

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cwote
Your mental health comes before school, always. If it’s midnight, and you have an exam the next day, but your hands have been shaking for the past hour and a half and you’re not so sure you want to be alive anymore, pull out that carton of Ben and Jerry’s and afterwards, go the fuck to bed. So what if you get a 68% on the exam the next day? You took care of yourself and at the end of the day that will always come before a high test score. To hell with anyone who tells you differently.

Anonymous  (via cwote)

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latosblog
legacy-of-hypocrites asked:

To you, what are the three to five most important things in Life? Rank your answer from most important to fifth-most important, and please avoid extremely broad terms like "Love" or "Strength" - be a bit more specific. I'm curious to hear what you value in this broken, yet progressing, world. 👍🏻 And yes, I'm an optimistic pessimist. This world is both beautiful and horrifying.

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latosblog answered:
  1. True Love - Loving is my favorite thing to do in life. I like to make others happy and I like to look at someone who looks back at me, seeing who I am. Ya know, like really looking into you. This is being truly connected. 
  2. Passion - This hits on love to some degree, but you can find passion in all facets of life, like your work, your friends, etc. It’s the passion-filled pieces in life that make it worth living. 
  3. Meaningful Conversations - These help you feel understood. You need to be understood in life. You need to be around those that see you for who you are and care about what’s going on inside your head. Being misunderstood is very lonely.
  4. Honesty - This is how you tap into everything on this list. Be honest with what makes you happy and what makes you sad, who you like and who drains you. We often let friends and family tell us who we are and though they want what is best for us and know who we are pretty well, at the end of the day, no one knows you better than you know you.
  5. Self Care - The best way to add good into this world is to be the best version of yourself. Making sure you are taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do for this world, because it adds happy. 
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bpdzoldyck-deactivated20181014

A note on the topic of trauma that I personally found helpful in accepting the idea that I am a trauma victim is that one of the most widely accepted facts in the field of trauma research is that abuse is often not the common factor in whether somebody will develop ptsd. 

Many people can go through awful things without developing trauma based disorders as long as they receive compassion and support in processing those events as they happen. The most common factor in developing something like ptsd is emotional neglect. And emotional neglect on it’s own can be enough. 

Whatever you went through was enough I promise, you’re not overreacting. Abuse and neglect are traumatic at any level, you don’t need to have gone through the worst possible experience you can think of to develop ptsd. If it hurt you then it hurt you.

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smiles-advice

If you don’t think you can make it through the day, then focus on the next hour. If you can’t make it through the next hour, focus on the next few minutes. If the next few minutes is far too difficult, then just take it one breath at a time.

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cwote
Your mental health comes before school, always. If it’s midnight, and you have an exam the next day, but your hands have been shaking for the past hour and a half and you’re not so sure you want to be alive anymore, pull out that carton of Ben and Jerry’s and afterwards, go the fuck to bed. So what if you get a 68% on the exam the next day? You took care of yourself and at the end of the day that will always come before a high test score. To hell with anyone who tells you differently.

Anonymous  (via cwote)

runforendorphins

Running is running. It hurts, but that’s all it does. The most difficult part of the training is training your mind. You build calluses on your feet to endure the road. You build calluses on your mind to endure the pain. There’s only one way to do that. You have to get out there and run.