anyone else know what you’re supposed to talk about with other grown adults after work has been covered
we were roses together. roses and sunflowers.
Thanks all who reblogged those posts about my friend. Her funeral was on Thursday. Harry Potter music played as we walked in, her coffin was Gryffindor themed, and apparently she was buried in her Hogwarts uniform with her wand. She was mad for Harry Potter, obviously haha
It was a good send-off. One of our friends missed the service, a baby cried and had to leave, a few phones went off, two people speaking got the university she went to wrong, the vicar compared Dobby to Jesus, one of the songs had a verbal introduction, and the last song was What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger 😂 There was a lot of giggles from me haha though it was mostly crying, as you’d expect. To be fair, us lot from uni all had a few jokes and laughs, it was nice.
A few of my memories were read out, and at the burial I got to throw dust on her coffin. A few people from uni came including our lecturer and a guy from Finland I never thought I’d see again. It was really nice to see them all. The theme was odd socks so I had a knee-high Hufflepuff sock, and a regular Hogwarts one - loads of people went Harry Potter! One of her cousins I think came in a Hufflepuff uniform, I think someone else had a wand and raised it at her grave.
I met her family who were lovely and so like her. Her mother thanked us for coming all the way we did (for most of us it was over a three hour journey) at the wake and we were applauded which was a bit odd haha
There were a couple balloons people could write on that were released. I wrote “mischief managed for now, love you always bae” and other people wrote nice things too. Our friend said “bye Felicia” - ‘cause she’d always say that.
When we were leaving someone that knew her from home offered to take our picture, and said that she knew we were Ash’s friends because we all looked quirky and weird. She said she saw us and was like “yep. they’re Ashleigh’s friends”. I don’t know why but I really treasure that.
Wizards Unite was also released a day early so it coincided with her funeral. It was a heavy, heavy day, but of course, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times - if only one remembers to turn on the light.
This is Ash and I (she’s on the right). The first picture ever taken of us and one of the last.
She failed her first year of uni the first time around, and God am I glad she did. Because that meant she was held back and joined my class. We immediately hit it off and had a friendship based on taking the piss out of each other, bitching about other people, and laughter.
The last time I saw her was the day of that second photo in July. We had a tearful bawling goodbye, slow-dancing to some pop song in a nightclub. The same club the first picture is from, actually, the first place we met. I will regret for the rest of my life not making more of an effort to speak and meet up with her after uni. We spoke a little and had some plans, but I’d often leave it a long time to respond (as I do with everyone) and the plans just never happened. The last we spoke was in January. Never in my life did I think I wouldn’t see her again.
I can’t do anything to change what’s happened. I just needed to let out a fraction of what I’m feeling, because this vortex of emotion inside me is confusing and suffocating and it just hurts so much.
Her family is trying to raise money for her funeral. A 23-year-old healthy woman isn’t exactly a funeral you prepare for. Please, please donate and share if you can.
Rest in peace, Ash. I love you. Always.
I’ve made a couple posts about my friend who died. Her name was Ashleigh, or Ash. Ashers, as I’ve recently found out some of her family called her.
She was 23, this obviously came as a massive shock. Her family is trying to raise the funeral costs. She was such a unique, amazing, hilarious, beautiful, and loving girl - she really does deserve an @ashmazinglyonfire send-off.
Please share or donate if you can.
I wish I could have beliefs that bring me peace and hope. But I don't.
the fact that other people are just... happy when you're not here anymore is a knife to my chest with each of their smiles
and i know you wouldn't want me to think that.
This guilt will weigh on me like a paperweight of my own design forever.
"i'm always trying to improve!" i tell myself.
until i die.
I’ve made a couple posts about my friend who died. Her name was Ashleigh, or Ash. Ashers, as I’ve recently found out some of her family called her.
She was 23, this obviously came as a massive shock. Her family is trying to raise the funeral costs. She was such a unique, amazing, hilarious, beautiful, and loving girl - she really does deserve an @ashmazinglyonfire send-off.
Please share or donate if you can.
i've never dealt with this kind of grief before. what do i do with all this guilt inside me?
It's so hard to see everyone else go about like normal.
How is it fair that you were taken so soon?
i hope that this deep sense of aloneness and unaccomplishment that we all seem to be feeling is just a "twenties" thing. i can't cope with this my whole life.
i didn't know you long or well but i'm heartbroken you're gone. i know now we connected on a soul level.
Have higher standards for the people you surround yourself with.
i wish i read more, like i used to.
i wish i wrote more, like i used to.
i wish i had money. i wish i had a job i loved.
i wish a lot of things, like i used to.
stopjoshdun
Send me a URL anonymously and I'll tell you
Do they follow me: Yes | No
Do I follow them: Yes | No | Now
What I think about their blog:
everything goes downhill once you hit double digits, basically