You're top drawer, Auntie Mame!

Me entering any museum: man I’m so excited to learn all the things

Also me: GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP

There are two dragons inside of you. One hoards knowledge and the other hoards trinkets. They’re both very excited when you bring them to a museum

college is like. i am the stupidest person in the world. i am a god. i am universally loved. these people only tolerate me because they live with me. everyone in this library desires me carnally. i am repulsive. i am myself. i am as far from myself as i have ever been. i am an adult and i have never left the womb. 

x

For Christmas this year, I got a Jurassic Park Velociraptor toy, and even though it’s now a few days past Christmas, I decided to make this stopmotion video because I couldn’t stop laughing at the idea. Enjoy!

Animated with Stop Motion Studio Pro app on my iPad.

This is a masterpiece

Cum is the 5th humor and brother, I'm about to start acting hilarious

deploying a squadron of transgender werewolves to your location

you can thank me later

Wait what

T minus 15 seconds til transgender werewolf impact

Well I for one would like to thank you

hop

speaking of legacy memes

2003……. .. this meme is almost 20 years old.

this meme could vote. this meme could go to war and die for its country.

I was 2

Don’t do this to me again.

NOOOOOOO

(via @shecannutbread)

Like, a week or two ago, my sibling showed me some HxH merch being sold at Universal Japan. This included a shirt that was “““inspired””” by Hisoka, but it is a shapeless polo shirt. It’s a terrible 50s bowling shirt. It’s the type of collared shirt fast food chains give employees. idk who looked at the character of Hisoka and thought that shirt was acceptable, but whatever. 

Anyway, I made this matching sweatshirt/sweatpants set out of spite and rage. It’s the same silhouette with three different patterns and colorways. The drawstrings on the hood have beads/charms. Also, any designer worth their salt needs to be able to make plus-size garments that are the same quality as other sizes.   

When people get pregnant, they will give up smoking, give up alcohol, give up coffee and soda, give up fondue and raw cheese, give up cold cuts and sushi, all because they have heard somewhere, from someone, that these things can be bad for the baby. They don’t know the research, haven’t looked at the studies, can’t talk about sample sizes and control groups. But their dedication to their future child’s safety is so strong, their caution is so overpowering, that they give up these things just in case. 

So it baffles me when those same people will insist on spanking their kids. 

Even when they are shown the research.

 Regardless of what the experts in the field say. 

No matter who says it. 

Or how it is said. 

People are so invested in this ability to hit their kids without judgement or consequence, that it absolutely confounds me. 

I’m just going to say this- if you come on this post, which specifically critiques spanking children, ignore all the links which provide evidence for why spanking is bad, and argue that you either DO or WILL spank your own children -

You are either an intentionally bad parent and/or a deeply damaged child.

We can forgive our parents for fucking up in their ignorance and acting out on their own damage. You don’t have to condemn them or hate them for it. They loved us, and they weren’t perfect.

But you are your own person and you have an obligation to be better.

I think most people agree that hitting a baby hard enough to make them cry is not OK. In fact, you could be brought up on abuse charges for it. Non-consensually hitting an adult hard enough to make them cry is illegal as well; it’s assault/battery.

So why do some people believe that there is there some nebulous age in which it’s perfectly OK to hit someone hard enough to make them cry? Someone who is too young and too small to even defend themselves against you? Someone who you are supposed to protect?

“When I was about 20 years old, I met an old pastor’s wife who told me that when she was young and had her first child, she didn’t believe in striking children, although spanking kids with a switch pulled from a tree was standard punishment at the time. But one day when her son was four or five, he did something that she felt warranted a spanking–the first of his life. And she told him that he would have to go outside and find a switch for her to hit him with. The boy was gone a long time. And when he came back in, he was crying. He said to her, “Mama, I couldn’t find a switch, but here’s a rock that you can throw at me.”

All of a sudden the mother understood how the situation felt from the child’s point of view: that if my mother wants to hurt me, then it makes no difference what she does it with; she might as well do it with a stone. And the mother took the boy onto her lap and they both cried. Then she laid the rock on a shelf in the kitchen to remind herself forever: never violence. And that is something I think everyone should keep in mind. Because violence begins in the nursery–one can raise children into violence.“

- Astrid Lindgren, Never Violence

This especially true for libertarians and anarcho capitalists. If you center your worldview around not initiating aggression then you cannot accept spanking as acceptable. The evidence of its harm is well documented and unequivocal. Do not strike your children.

I forgot who said it, but if you argue that they’re too young to reason why they shouldn’t do something when asked verbally not to do it, then they’re also too young to understand why they’re being beaten; especially by the same people they love and trust the most.

We all have it in us to break the cycle of senseless violence that we experienced and be better. It should be the goal of every parent to set a higher standard and provide their children with a better upbringing than they had. Every parent should demand that of themselves instead of making excuses to perpetuate the status quo.

The Bible makes it very clear to “Spare not the rod.”

Well, it’s a good thing I’m not taking child development tips from a nearly 3,000 year old collection of moral codes from a religion that I dont believe in.

Like, ok, so the Jewish people believed in hitting children 2800 years ago when the book of Proverbs was supposedly first collected. (Which says nothing about how modern day Jewish people interpret that specific book anyway) Good for them.

That has nothing to do with me, my morals, or how I plan on interacting with children.

Apologies for diving down that rabbit hole, but Biblical interpretation is my niche.

So, first: the Bible doesn’t say “spare not the rod.” But there are, as F&F notes, three partial verses from Proverbs that come close enough for certain people to use as prooftexts.

Second, those three partial verses from Proverbs need to be put back into context - and it’s worth noting that proverbs are inherently poetic. Nobody claims that Aesop’s fables are about literal talking animals, for example. One of the three verses from Proverbs continues on to say that a disciplined child “will not die,” and if you insist on taking that literally then I just can’t help you.

And when you put those three partial verses in the literary context, even just by finishing the individual verses, it’s clear they’re about instruction, not punishment. This is where you start to see translators inserting their own bias, because those verses will continue by saying (e.g.) “the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them,” but the word translated “discipline” is elsewhere in Proverbs translated “instruction” - e.g. “A wise son heeds his father’s instruction,” Proverbs 13:1a.

Then there’s the historical context: how was “the rod” used 3000 years ago? The author(s) of Proverbs never use the word “spank” or “switch” or anything like that. Taking these verses as meaning “hit your child with a stick” is inserting the modern context into the ancient one. Proverbs does not explain how the rod is used, but elsewhere in the Tanakh (Hebrew Bible), a rod is a shepherd’s tool, used to guide the flock - consider Psalm 23, “The Lord is my shepherd… your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” You don’t spank your sheep, that’s just silly.

So, tl;dr - no, the Bible does not “make it very clear to ‘Spare not the rod.’” That’s nothing more than someone who wants to spank their child going out and looking for justification.

An excellent addition!

I’d like to add that, even if Proverbs DID actually advocate hitting children in it’s original context (an assumption which, as you pointed out, is dubious)- trying to transplant a moral action from an ancient text into a modern context without modification is a….dubious activity.

I might agree with The Odyssey that being a generous host and a considerate guest are important morals, but it would be ridiculous to try and transplant the specific hospitality norms of the Odyssey into a 2021 American life.

Using faith to justify hitting children makes you a shit, basically. It reflects poorly on your faith and your parenting.

If Batman and Spider-Man switched rogues galleries none of their villains would last more than ten minutes against the new enemy

Batman takes down all of Spider-Man’s villains with ruthless efficiency and preparation

Batman’s villains are all like “TAKE ME SERIOUSLY DAMMIT” and Spider-Man is like “No 😜”

The Joker would have an intense hatred for Spider-Man because Spider-Man is actually funny

That was the exact thought process behind this post

In Gotham:

“Riddle me this-”

“I like knock knock jokes better.”

In New York: 

Green Goblin is getting his ass beat by 12 orphans in spandex

Life was good when we made dark fantasy films using muppets. No more captain america no more crisp ratt were doing gelflings some more, and those little shits from labyrinth.

The Dark Crystal series was really good but I desperately want to see what kinda fucked up muppets you can make with a $200 million budget

If we give the Jim Henson company $200 million, those felt fucks are going to be sentient

hey can someone give me $200 million real quick? for purposes

yeah, I got some nfts... some nice fucking tits LOL

there should be a club for divorced men to have bad sex with each other