Pretend I don’t see you in the corner Trying to ignore me, like you could forget What it feels like to have me in your bed, tried to erase it; it’s permanent the mark I left, like a scar formed from a memory you regret. You Regret It.
It was just liked you promised We were better off in time Your memory is softer round the eyes and I’m mostly being honest when I tell you that I’m fine Until I wake up in the middle of the night On the wrong side
You’ve known since a young age
people aren’t what they seem.
Behind their beauty and their bones
lies a human without reason.
Life continues to teach us
to give and give, keep giving
until there is nothing left but empty.
How do we survive it?
Hold on to the memories:
the shallow truths, the heavy lies;
all the questions that went answered
with nothing more than silence.
Remember what you fight for
even if you’ve never seen it in the flesh.
Don’t let go of hope and wonder
despite feeling there’s none of either left.
It doesn’t define you when they say
you’ve done something wrong.
In the end it turns out you’re all
you ever needed after all.
You are never alone; you can always find me in the skyline, 10/25/2017
Anonymous asked:
What is Love? What does it feel like and how do you know how when you’re in love ??
I don’t believe that love can possibly be unitarily defined - everyone experiences it differently, refining it with their own expectations and desires.For me, love is about trust, openness, patience, and communication. If you have these things, love feels like happiness should. You don’t worry about the hard days because your partner isn’t there to judge you for them, they’re there to support you through them, and vice versa. You don’t worry about not seeing eye to eye on everything because you shouldn’t; fall in love with someone that pushes you to grow and expand rather than stay comfortable in where you’ve always been. You should feel like you can be at home with your partner, even if you don’t always feel like you’re at home within yourself. You’ll know you’re in love when you’re not afraid to be honest about the hard days; when you want to share the worst things about yourself because you know that person won’t run. Love isn’t about finding that one perfect person for you. No one is perfect. Love is about finding someone and saying “you are the best you that you can possibly be, but together, we can learn and grow and become better every day”.
The sun on my neck reminds me that it is okay to feel like I am not okay. It soothes the pain that is always saying I should be embarrassed because I am human. Who is she? Who is she? That woman there collecting leaves. More variant colours than mixed emotions; the leaves are free.
Mean when drunk. Spills secrets with a sour tongue. Bitter when the bottle's down. Wishing my stomach was empty; the less I eat, the faster the release. A feeling I know all too well coming from a family well versed in how to disappear the liquor. It’s worship.
Asking you to carry me
I stayed ignorant to your needs.
Love wasn't what I gave you
it was weight: a heavy dose
of sorrow and pain to blame
for my mistakes. I wanted
to be better, and some days
I think maybe I was. My love
was never for you; it was selfish.
It was rushed. I wanted you
to need me; I'm afraid I always will,
but you've seen real love now.
Selfish just won't do.
You've done better than outgrow me;
you left me high and dry.
You knew exactly what I needed
to open up my eyes.
My Love Was Never For You, by Mariah Gordon-Dyke
I know we’re better off this way but God, forgive me for missing you still. It’s all burned down. I know, I know. You’re no longer alone. I wear more masks now. I cannot will my heart to forget you. It will be fine. I’ll see you in the sunrise. You’ll still burn holes in my eyes. I won’t cry. I won’t talk to them about you. I’ll be alright after you.