the end of men in black is so funny. your boss trains you for two days on interplanetary relations then says "ok I think you can take it from here. I'm wiping my own memory so don't bother calling me if you have any questions"
Everyday people wake up and they are so sure they are not in an [insert genre] movie today, but just remember, you only need to be present in one day of a Godzilla movie to be sure that you could wake up in any genre of movie.
Condom machines off for the royal period of mourning💔💔💔
#Bareback4Lizzie
pay your respects to me by doing the things i loved
#Bareback4Lizzie
#GOATthroatLizzie
You were so fine how'ed your sons turn out so ugly?
the magic of incest
Anonymous asked:
So... can we have the six counties back now? - Ireland
““Hell is other people” is only one side of the coin. The other side, which no one seems to mention, is also “Heaven is each other”. Hell is separateness, uncommunicability, self-centeredness, lust for power, for riches, for fame. Heaven on the other hand is very simple, and very hard: caring about your fellow beings. And that’s possible on a sustained basis only in collectivity.”
— Jean-Paul Sartre; in “Talking with Sartre” (p. 130) [edited] (via insearchofwisdom)
Get you a guy that is so grabbable. Get you a guy that is a stress toy
a stress boy
"if mushrooms are the superior lifeform that really calls the shots on this earth, why haven't they destroyed us yet?" listen to yourself. have we as humans gotten rid of every mountain on the planet just because we are smarter than big rocks? no!! because they don't pose a threat to us. sure some people die rock climbing or skiing and that's tragic but mountains aren't dangerous to us as a global society. do you see where i am going with this. it's your misplaced hubris that makes you think that humankind is worth destroying to a mushroom. we are a part of the mundane landscape on the surface. we pose no threat to the mycelian era. humble yourself
I hate when I tell people how flying cars will never be the way they want them to be (if they ever become a thing at all) cuz they always say "well people said that about cars and stated that horses would stay and look at us now!" Yeah exactly look at how idiotic 80% of drivers are, now imagine giving them the Y axis
business men meeting for the first time will sniff eachothers cards
sure. business men will sniff eachothers taints i guess. whatever. im going to dairy queen
"Phonoaesthetics isn't my thing so I can't explain why, but German is an inherently funny language," exhibit A
I love it because it was a choice. They could have put the whole title in English, THE QUEEN. They could have put the whole title in German, DIE KÖNIGIN. Anyone writing at the spiegle speaks English proficiently, it was not an accident they choose chaos.
I think now that queens dead they should have her stuffed and put on display in Cairo for the next 150 years.
BLAZE REJECTED MY POST WOW LOL
We'll make sure at least 100k people see it for free then.
whadda
@tazerpagan did an experiment and tried copy/pasting and submitting to blaze again and it worked. So, just goes to show blaze has… inconsistent moderation to say the least.
Science side of Tumblr lives
"what drugs was op on when they wrote this lmao" none. due to the tense economic situation i've resorted to having weird thoughts for free