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The Marshmallow Nymph

@theangriestlittleunicorn / theangriestlittleunicorn.tumblr.com

I'm a unicorn. I have things to be angry about. Age: 30; Pronouns: she/her, they/them; I mostly reblog stuff I like. Expect a lot of cute animals. I also post about witchcraft and crochet and books and food and mental health and whatever. Check out my craft blog over at thecraftiestlittleunicorn.tumblr.com
Anonymous asked:

Are there any blue roses? Like real ones. Or do they just take the white, green, or red ones then paint them as blue?

no, blue roses don't occur in nature- but they're easy to make artificially. just place a cut white rose into blue-dyed water and wait a bit, and eventually the rose will be blue. also why did you ask me this

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i used to stick flowers in dye as a kid to make them different colors

every month i track down and kill a member of various professions so that i can absorb their workplace knowledge. last june i shredded a florist

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So my cat Ashley has severe seperation anxiety and she was having a Moment so I made a cat sling after googling it how to do it and this is the best idea ever.

She is calm and purring. Sleeping and comfy. She's not running around screaming and destroying my room but she's held against my torso and occasionally butting her head against chest with her eyes closed. I'm cleaning and she'll only ocasionally wake up if I make too much noise doing something then she goes right back to sleep like meowmimimimimimi meowmimimimi

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Sorry for the gross mirror but meowmimimimimi

THISSSSS THIS IS IT!!!

I hate having migraines

My delightful little brother had to take me to the ER for a migraine with CoNcErNiNg SyMpToMs yesterday. He took me to the good hospital. And he did me the various courtesies of driving, being a hilarious conversationalist, making sure I had sunglasses, and at no point in time did he do the silly ass shit of asking me if I was okay or how I felt. These are among the reasons why he’s my favorite. The other one was because when the legit actual neurologist described something they found in my dome as weird and funky, his wife looked at me and said “it’s the gay. They found it.” He picked a very fantastic person to marry.

Yeah, that one is funny.

Imagine being buried alive and then seeing this little guy with a backpack suddenly arrive

It gets better. The little backpack has a two-way radio.

So you’re trapped under rubble, and then a rat shows up. Flicks a switch on its little tumtum. And starts talking to you.