Hiii, so I hope you won't mind my little rant. If you do, feel free to delete this! But I have no one I can comfortably talk to about this at this point, so I thought why not.

So I've accidentally started learning about ADHD just this year. Honestly I was trying to find some info on something else but then I got distracted and, y'know. I never before in my life thought I might have ADHD, but now I think there's a high chance. I'm scared to talk about this to my GP or anyone else really. I'm scared they'll mock me or ignore what I'm saying, or say I'm stupid etc.

Either way, I have some trouble umderstanding hyperfocus & hyperfixation. I always think of excuses why it's probably not that but idk. For example, I love video games. Always have. It's the only interest of mine that stayed with me from early childhood up til now that I'm an adult. I often can play over 120 hours a week, especially when I find a new game I'm really into. Then I won't even finish it and just... leave it. I WANT TO finish it but seemingly I can't. Don't know why. Same goes with books, comics, tv series etc. Once, I accidentally found out there's this flower marigold and I immediately thought it's really beautiful. An hour passed and I ended up ordering seeds, pots, compost etc. for the next day. I got to work and for the next couple of weeks I kept blabbering about my flowers to anyone that would listen (and even if they wouldn't tbh, I was too excited and proud) and showing them pictures etc. It was like my little child. Until a few weeks passed and I grew bored. I wanted to clean the pot but I kind of kept procrastinating and it ended up dying :( Other times I find out a new book or manga series and order a few at the same time (yeah, I have a spending problem) and just end up never finishing it. It's just lying on my shelves, waiting for me to pick it up again.

I don't know if any of these are hyperfocus or hyperfixations but I thought I may as well ask for someone else's opinion or advice. Or just vent at the very least. Sorry for long message!

I ACCIDENTALLY SUBMITTED MY POST. Because i have stupid fingers. Continued…

-knowing your brain - for me, my brain learns best from 5pm - 1am. Which is nuts and people think I’m insane but also i am, but most importantly it works for me.

-know your memory. Studies show that people with ADHD have excellent quick recall and/or sensory memory (minutes to hours in the past), and good long term memory (think weeks to months in the past) , butttt our short term/working memory leaves lots to be desired (think days to about 2 weeks). This means in order to be able to have the info available to you in an exam, you need to have actually encoded it in your brain over time. Cramming does work…sometimes, because you’re putting the info up front. But there’s only so much space there for information. It’s unreliable.

That said, i study long term, small bits every night, every week. Harder/more demanding subjects get more time. And since i have stimulants at hand, i work until they wear off… and then continue through late night without them. If i can perform without my meds and ready to fall asleep, i can perform no matter what (which might seem extreme to others but also the grad program I’m aiming for requires a 3.75 gpa for admittance so…).

With my accounting classes, i read the text, record the lectures (with permission - is a LIFESAVER), and work through problems constantly and i go through them three times - one where i allow myself to check for assistance as i complete them. I mark it, and then do those i got wrong a second time without looking. I mark it, and anything i got wrong the second time i set aside, review that material before bed, and then attempt them the next day. I process new information in my sleep, so by reviewing the info I’m not confident on before sleeping, i can have it pretty well handled the next day. And then once I’ve completed everything and gotten it all right… I go through with new numbers. Or attack the concept from a different angle. Anything to keep it fresh and to thoroughly understand the “why”. Someone can tell me the “how” all they want, but without the why, it will never click.

At exam time, i create a study sheet no more than two nights before to drag the info up into the “relevant” category in my head, and then review that sheet right before the exam to bring it front and center. Then I take a deep breath and head in as soon as i lock my screen.

Test taking itself - earplugs help. A LOT. Comfy clothes. I’m happiest in sweats and a oversized hoodie and tbh, no bra. Not ashamed, because anything that is uncomfortable distracts me from the info on my head. I write down formulas or key concepts immediately, and then read the test through and work it from concepts i know best to concepts i take the most time on (my exams are timed). Usually that goes 1) m/c or short answer that are conceptual, 2) m/c or short answer that are quantitative, and then 3) long answer from strongest to weakest. But that’s not always the order - sometimes a long answer qualitative is so familiar to me that it goes to the front of the line.

Those are my things. Everyone tells me it’s a lot. It is. And that they don’t have time for that…which isn’t true, since i am full time and work two jobs (since i am older). Their priorities are just different. Which is fine! But for me, with a learning disability, that’s what it takes for unchallenged success.

I know it’s a massive wall of text but if you post this i hope it helps someone! And I’m leaving my user visible - if anyone around wants to ask any more questions they’re welcome to :)

tadhdfw making food is actually a permanent hyperfixation of yours so that you don't relate to forgetting to eat but instead you treat it like a hobby instead of a biological need and end up going "I'm not really in the mood for Food right now, you know?" and later the hyperfixation hits you and you end up making 3 separate dishes and two trays of cookies at 3 am even though you're not hungry and live alone (and you don't even eat any of it most times)

hi- i’m the person who asked for advice on what to do when i get assessed! i uhhh forgot to read the faq before i sent that ask. i’m gonna go to the blog you recommended about it, so no need to answer that one! sorry for any inconvenience and have a nice day!

Do you or any of your followers have advice on dealing with the stress of getting tested and the overall waiting process?

I should be getting a call within the next two weeks to book my appointment, and the realization that it's finally happening has me feeling a little nervous. I think it's mostly just coming to terms with how long I've been dealing with been struggling and being able to put a name to it, and the idea that after all of this, my results still come back negative. It's just...then what, y'know?

The only real sense of stability I'm feeling about it is (1) the reassurance that my experiences and struggles are valid, namely by a friend with ADHD who has been my strongest supporter with getting tested since she recognized a lot of what I deal with as stuff she faces and (2) my therapist who said that with my symptoms it's very unlikely that should happen, but we can always get a second opinion and add it into our current plan.

Did you or anyone else deal with similar feelings and fears when you were going through the whole process?

Wanted to share: I was explaining to my therapist how I have a hard time accessing tasks because they live behind walls in my brain. These walls are often built out of shame because I feel like I should’ve already taken care of the task, or I shouldn’t have it to begin with. After the wall is there I have a hard time facing those feelings and it spirals to me having, say, 3 weeks of laundry to do.

She said something super insightful. What is it that tells me that any given task is “past due”? Is it just me noticing that it needs to be done? If that’s the case, I’m never giving myself an opportunity to have a due date and to complete it by then. Seeing that the sink is getting full, for example, doesn’t mean the dishes should’ve already been done, it just means they’ll need to be done soon. I don’t need to feel shame about completing tasks on a need based system, rather than doing each dish as it gets dirty.

So we came up with this: I now have a note on my phone where when I see that something is getting close to “due”, I assign a due date. That gives me time to have the possibility of succeeding and doing a good job. It’s been great so far. I’m finding that I want to do good for myself, so I’m meeting the clearly defined due dates. And then it’s a great opportunity to have good thoughts about myself and the work I do for myself, like, “I’m doing the laundry because I committed to doing it before Friday. I did this because I deserve to have clothes to wear that smell nice.” versus always thinking “this shoulda already been done you piece of shit”

Just wanted to share! I know there’s lots we all can’t change, and a lot of your blog is about acceptance. But it feels nice to work towards having more control and peace. Shame drives so much in the adhd brain and I love ways to circumvent that process.

Hi! As a somewhat young person, what should I do if I’m considering tests for ADHD? Take your time or feel free to forget about this ask if something’s wrong.

Is it normal for ADHD people to get bored of food and eating in general? I'm the person that will try anything just for the thrill of trying something new but I've tried so many dishes now that I'm bored of everything relatively easy to find in the grocery store.

hello, i've been following this blog for almost as long as it's existed and i just want to say i appreciate it being here for so long... when i first followed i had the suspicion that i had adhd but i didn't want to ask for help, and reading the posts here made me feel a lot less alone in my struggle. it's been a long road but i recently, finally, got diagnosed and medicated! things are a lot easier now but i'll always remember and appreciate you guys for spreading awareness with humor and a sense of community, and i hope you're all doing well in your own lives<3

Most people's wedding to do check list: make sure venue has all your details correct, get all rsvps in and send out timely thank yous for early gifts

ADHD bride checklist: remembering to brush your gosh dang teeth so they dont look yellow, crying as you try to arrange timelines for everything, panicking as you realize you forgot to invite your aunts new husband-

That post wasn't funny enough to warrant a caption for the gif....