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Starlite

@starlitesymphony / starlitesymphony.tumblr.com

Science fiction writer | tag game friendly | header image by @spacetimewraithwrites 
neurodivergent-noodle-deactivat

it is perhaps more helpful to move the conversation away from “it’s okay not to be productivetowe need to have a long hard think about what counts as productivity”.

if you’re ill (chronic or otherwise), it is productive to spend a day sleeping and resting up. your body needs you to rest so that it can heal.

but something that is true for everyone is that things like healing from trauma, learning new things, practicing hobbies, building relationships… are all productive ways to spend your time. just because you’re not making money doesn’t mean you’re not being productive.

looking after yourself is productive. looking after others is productive. hell, playing with your pet is productive.

productive means being in a state of producing something. that’s all it means. and when you’re doing the things your body needs you to do… you’re producing your own well-being. you’re producing neural pathways. you’re producing happiness.

if you can feel a sense of productivity from non-traditional productive actions… I think that’s a lot more helpful for your mental health than just claiming that productivity isn’t important. of course it’s okay to not be productive. but I know I feel better when I think of happiness as something I can produce.

If you’re not writing so well at the moment:

Remember you are not a bad writer!

Many writers go through slumps of motivation due to health issues, or other factors they just can’t control. You can’t expect to always be working at your best!

If you need to take a break from your writing to do something else and get your brain working again, go ahead and do whatever you need to! Try doing something else creative like drawing, crafting or music! Try doing some normal household tasks or just spending time with somebody you like. Get your creative juices flowing by finding your inspiration!

You can always try new prompts, methods or genres to get interested again, too! If you normally write romance, try writing an action scene or something comedic. You never know what new ideas might come to you. If it doesn’t work out, at least you will have learned things from it.

Everything you write has some kind of value! If you write something and later think it isn’t very good, you can always redraft and edit it until you find it satisfactory. To get extra value out of works you’re not so fond of, maybe take some notes on what you want to improve and what you’re not satisfied with so you can do some research on how to combat the problems you face!

Writing, like all forms of creativity, requires growth and improvement. You can’t grow and improve if everything you make is perfect. Everything you write is going to be better than something you have written in the past.

Sometimes you just need to be okay with something not being your best work. As long as you’re writing and enjoying it, and your writing is positive for you and others, you are writing in a healthy and productive way!

You are not a bad writer! Every writer has bad drafts.

hey writeblrs, tips for writing good parents and healthy wholesome parent-child relationships?

  • They can joke with each other without it being mean spirited because they respect boundaries.
  • The child knows that they can go to their parents when they’re in trouble. They might be angry with the bad decision but will still unconditionally love the child and help get them to a safe place (either physically or mentally)
  • Parents try to maintain a good work/home life balance, they might have mandatory family fun on weekends or prioritize a family dinner together no matter how busy they are
  • Parents turn out for the kids activities even if they’re not personally a fan, driving them to clubs and school events
  • Good communication - if they drive, kids make sure to text when they get to the destination safely and check in often if they live away.
  • If it’s a big family with multiple siblings, parents take time for all of the kids, and while older siblings might help raise the younger kids, the burden of parenting isn’t on them
  • In terms of discipline, when a kid messes up, the parent will explain why they’re in trouble and deserve a fair punishment and leave room for making it up. It becomes a learning experience
  • Children look up to and respect their parents. Little kids might try to mimic them. They know their parents aren’t perfect but appreciate that they try their best and work together to make the relationship strong
  • Parents try to act as overly-affectionate in public and it kind of embarrasses the kid but they secretly appreciate it and know that if they need someone to kick up a fuss in their defense, their parents will have their back.
  • the parent(s) speak frankly with their kids about their own flaws, personal history, and trauma. they may wait till the kids are older to acknowledge severe traumas, but they are clear and honest with them, and willing to admit to their own mistakes.
  • parents actively listen to their children, gain an understanding of their interests, and attempt to relate. this is usually extremely embarrassing for the child.
  • they give their child space to be alone and privacy with their friends and online. they do not feel the obligation to involve themselves in every aspect of their child’s life, especially when they’re a teenager.
  • parents trust their child to tell them what the child needs to tell them. they may experience anxiety over what their child hides from them, but they don’t put pressure on them to reveal their secrets.
  • parents allow the child to experience natural consequences for their actions, rather than punishing them for every misstep.
  • parents help their child to become financially responsible at an appropriate age.
  • if the child is involved in activities, like clubs, sports, or extracurriculars, the parent tries to be involved as well.

keep in mind that a parent-child relationship is a *relationship*. a healthy relationship has rapport; inside jokes; a consensus on what’s ok to say and what isnt. older children especially ought to have near-equal say in these relationships, and even a very young child should feel as though their needs, wants, and passions are being considered :)

it can be tough if you haven’t had very good parents to model, so my advice is to keep in mind the dynamic of a pair of very old friends. only one has known the other since uhh.. pre-birth!

ironic-points-of-light-deactiva

Lord of the Rings was published in the fifties, and largely written in the forties. Tolkien’s opinions on society and morality and technology are at some points genuinely more conservative than what I’m comfortable with. And yet, the more I think about it, the more sure I am that Tolkien actually deconstructs most of the clichéd fantasy tropes he supposedly originates. Some examples.

  • The long-lost heir is not the hero, he’s a side character who deliberately uses himself as a decoy.
  • The real hero actually fails in his quest, his goodness and determination and willpower utterly fail in the face of evil, and the world is saved by a series seemingly unrelated good deeds.
  • The central conflict is not between destroying the world and preserving it. An age of the world will come to an end, and many great and beautiful things will perish, whether the heroes win or lose. The past may have been glorious, but preserving it is impossible, and returning to it is impossible, time has passed and the world has moved on. The king returns, but the elves are gone and magic fades from the very substance of Middle Earth. The goal is not to preserve the status quo, the goal is the chance to rebuild something on the ruins.
  • Killing the main villain seems to instantly solve the problem, eradicate all enemies and fix the world, except it doesn’t, not wholly, since the scouring of the Shire still has to happen.
  • Also, the hero gets no real reward, and what he gets, he cannot really enjoy. He is hurt by his ordeal, and never fully recovers.
  • There is a team of heroes, a classic adventuring party, except the Fellowship is together for less one sixth of the series. The Fellowship is intact from the Council of Elrond to Gandalf’s death, four chapters. The remaining eight are together until Boromir’s death, an additional six chapters. This is nothing compared to LOTR’s length of sixty-one chapters, if I count correctly.
  • Tolkien is not classic high fantasy. If you actually think about it, there is very little magic. The hobbits’ stealth is not magical, most elven wonders are not unambigously magical, wizards are extremely rare, and even Gandalf hardly uses magic if you compare him to the average DnD wizard. Most magic is indistinguishable from craft, there is no clear difference between a magic armor and a very good armor, between magic bread and very good bread, between magical healing and competent first-aid plus a few kind words.

TLDR: Stop praising recent fantasy for deconstructing Tolkien if they’re “deconstructing” something Tolkien has never actually constructed.

It is increasingly concerning to me to see more and more “sustainable” and “cruelty free” food alternatives & legislation that aims to ensure that small farmers cannot raise and/or hunt their own food. So many of these alternatives focus on corporate sold/lab made foods and legislation that will ensure only large corporations are the only ones that can afford to keep producing food.

Food is a human right. You should not have to pay a massive corporation to be able to eat. Legislation that makes it harder for poor people to keep and raise their own livestock is harmful. Legislation that excludes indigenous peoples from their native hunting lands & food species is harmful.

Reader: wow! I’m so curious how you’re going to fit everything you’ve been foreshadowing in here!

Me, frantically flipping through my notes, trying to figure out if I’ve accidentally foreshadowed something I Shouldn’t Have: ummm, yes. Right. Uh, just for fun, would you mind telling me what, that would be… exactly.

*sweats*

I don't know who needs to hear this, but you don't need to "perform" on tumblr

Don't apologize if you disappear for a few weeks, months, or even longer. We've done it too. You probably didn't even notice, and that's okay. Take your time.

Don't feel guilty if you had a regular posting schedule and you can't make your self-imposed deadline or if you can't keep up that pace and need to start posting less frequently. We understand, life gets in the way and the muses can be fickle. You don't owe us anything.

Don't worry if you don't reply fast enough. You'll get to it when you'll get to it. You probably haven't even seen it yet. We will not think less of you.

Don't feel bad if you don't want to reply to something at all, ever, because it triggers you, because you don't want more drama in your life, or because you just don't have the energy to reply. Whatever they are, your reasons are valid. And the other person has probably forgotten about it anyway by now.

Feel free to add other things!

<3 oh