the oceans no place for a squirrel

this video is a red wine stain on the white carpet of my brain

TOAD TUMMY TUESDAY!!!

How do I even respond to this

these were meant to be private

twitter is fun hehehehhe

nvm im deleting

I just wanted to use the microwave

Put it back quietly, go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, and practice your surprised face.

Put what back

hey does anyone know the fastest way to clean up milk that’s covering every goddamn i nch of the  kitchen floor

i know a gal……she’s on her way

thanks

dick starts sputtering like a cartoon car coughing out exhaust before seizing up and falling limp

two gays sharing an orange

this post made by aquarium gang

search WITHIN your local trash and you WILL find a friend and boy 

umm thats his blanket now

man this is weird but imagine being an ancient doctor who believes in humours etc and surgery doesn't exist but you perform the first legit autopsy to learn about anatomy and you're like.. wtf there's like objects in here and shit

- Andreas Vesalius, 1543

my bf texted me a picture of a mysterious big black roach looking bug on the floor and hasn’t answered me since… rip

dam u think that roach givin him the succ?