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AK FEDEAU: THE BLOG

@nihilnovisubsole / nihilnovisubsole.tumblr.com

it’s crazy how i don’t know what any of you do for school/uni/work? who are you guys outside of tumblr? what do you work as?? 

I’m shook at prev tags ur a CHEF?!? Was NOT expecting that tbh-

i was legit thinking about this today - what do you guys do (if you are comfortable sharing) - are you in school (if so, what are you studying) ? taking a break? figuring things out? working (if so, what?)

i genuinely want to know (it makes me feel like i know you all that much more)

@euxiom replied to your post:

oh my god do you have a cat AK, or is this a cat that randomly chilled on your porch?

nah, we just have several neighborhood cats that come by once in a while. i think this specific one might be a neighbor's outdoor cat. i snapped some other pictures of it about eighteen months ago - it seems to like to talk to me and rub its head on my leg.

i'm too allergic to cats to ever own one, so it's fun to have creatures that i can enjoy for brief enough periods that they don't make me sick. i think i've mentioned before that it's like i'm the animal in the zoo and they're the guests that come to observe my habitat. who knows, maybe one day they'll see me getting fed up with arknights and throw me a pumpkin lmao

Anonymous asked:

MADAME! I apologize for the significant wait, right after I asked that my summer went to hell, but I'm back and YES! I too was transformed by Big O and it's Dark Deco aesthetic! I was reading this and was like hahaha someone gets it! Down to the hair and clothes! Listen, I created my own love letter with a whole OC world that involves a murder mystery plot, mafia, Gastsby parties, and slow burn. Is my man Savio just Roger with a gray honor code and the ability to read minds? Hell yes he is!(1/2)

(2/2) I found electro swing/jazz again and I've been LOSING it. Creating whole playlists for OCs like it's 2004 and I just learned about FF net! Do I have a whole trailer in my head of that OC world that's accompanied by "Nightlife" by Amon Tobin because it sounds exactly like an AS/Toonami bump that would have worked for Big O? Yes, yes I do, and if I could animate...but for now, I write/draw. "Vous êtes si gentil" stays in my mind forever, just forever. And with that, we have come to terms!
PS: One quick thing! You know, it's funny. I got into your blog because of Saint's Row and the absolute fondness I had for your Boss/Player. I was always like "oh if this was a whole DLC with Oleg explaining his origins and Rosie was his boss in the Bratva, I'd play the hell out of this!" And then I found Dangerous Crowns and, quite frankly, lost my shit. You are a fantastic writer and I love the way you develop characters and intrigue! Stellar! Just wanted to share that too. ~ Big O Anon

omgg this is wild. i can't imagine doing a story without picking out at least a few songs to associate with it. in the past, i tended not to share those playlists with people, because privacy gave me permission to put, you know, ~cringe~ songs on them. but the VOW writers all shared our playlists when we were working on longsummer nights, and it was so fun to see how other people paired music with their work. 10/10 would subject my social circle to it again

you know what amazes me? people who can connect a song to a ship or a character based on the meaning of the lyrics. i take the coward's way out and pick on instrumentation and vibes, but the lyrics people? poets. modern-day philosopher-kings. also thank you about rosie, please have a song she has subjected the entire neighborhood to from her car speakers

i love it when you read multiple works from a writer and you start being able to pick out the things that stick with them. like the themes they keep thinking about, that can’t be satisfied with just one poem or novel or story. or the motifs they like to reuse and recycle throughout their works like an extradiagetic thread. it’s like drawing a map through a writer’s collection of all the things that keep them up at night

As a fic writer this terrifies me but I support you.

finally made it to LE2 with irina! gosh i love this game. i remembered why it's my favorite in the trilogy in like ten minutes.

  • right from the start, it's harder to stay paragon with her dialogue. this may ease off later, but in the first hour or so, you can't express cautious neutrality about cerberus or your new squad without earning at least a couple of renegade points. the paragon line doubles down on "cerberus is evil," which is certainly what irina would think, but not what she would say. when you've just woken up and you're surrounded by world-class killers, you want to stay frosty. play it close to the vest and figure out what you're dealing with.
  • on the other hand, it's nice that - at least for now - your dialogue choices with joker don't seem to net morality points. putting the boot down and ordering him to stop complaining about EDI was a pure Irina Roleplay Moment™ lmao. she may have gotten herself spaced trying to save his life, but she's still determined to knock some discipline into him.
  • omega has a sky! i don't know why it never occurred to me to look up on omega, but i noticed it this time. it completely changes the atmosphere of the place from a claustrophobic bunker to a sprawling cyberpunk city. next time you're playing a game, look up and admire the skybox for a while.
  • in LE1, garrus was the dark horse of irina's squad: the one whom i had mostly ignored on my first playthrough, but discovered an interesting dynamic with upon replay. in LE2, i wonder whether it'll be jacob. i think it really bothers irina that the alliance disappointed him, that they're letting talent like him and joker defect to cerberus. that speaks to deep, institutional issues that she might never have reckoned with if she hadn't seen them from the outside.
  • which is to say, i really need to mix up my squadmate choices this time
  • i love dragging zaeed around for the whole game but we're playing for story here!!

@euxiom replied to your post:

oh i love this idea. playing destiny, a fair number of lore entries are audio logs and such, im glad you're having fun AK!!

journal entries, audio logs, book excerpts, emails, etc. make up a big day-to-day part of many game writing jobs. [obsidian calls them "examinables," i'm not sure what the term is elsewhere.] we joke about the skeleton with the "this amulet isn't cursed!!" diary next to it, but the fact is, it makes a world feel more lived-in for very little resource cost. besides, if you look back at the historical record, people could be surprisingly meticulous about documenting their lives.

but yeah, i mean - what do i lose by trying it? it's more enjoyable for me to write out irina's terrible, socially-awkward run-ins with her squadmates than to just have her recount them. "showing vs. telling" means a hundred things to a hundred people, but that's gotta count for something, right? [okay, i mainly want to write her and zaeed's fights lmao]

over the course of picking at irina shepard's log, i decided to throw in a new ingredient: audio transcripts. they show up every now and then between journal entries as recordings pulled from various security systems. they're mainly between her and squadmates, but i didn't want to leave the old guard like joker, chakwas, or anderson out either. [i used to be a transcriber before i got the job at voltage, so it's funny to dust off those timestamping skills again.]

when you're trying to tell a story through a person's diary, you're limited to that person's interpretation of events. it didn't feel right that no one on the normandy would get to speak for themselves - mass effect is such an ensemble cast, you really lose a lot. between that and emails, you've got voices that contrast with irina's. they show that her perspective on the trilogy's missions is not always charitable, or even accurate.

i've wanted to do some serious writing in this format for years, but talked myself out of it because i worried it'd seem lazy. now more than ever i figure that fanfic is supposed to be fun, and i'd always touted it as a good place to experiment anyway. you have to practice what you preach.

listen, i love shipping as much as the next girl, but you know what can be just as much fun as a slow burn? a burn that never ignites. years of chemistry that the characters never, ever act upon because the writer knows it would deflate the tension they've built up. maybe they have lifestyles that would be incompatible, or maybe they work together and don't want to be unprofessional, or maybe they don't even realize it. it's about the fact that sometimes, the suggestion is more satisfying than any resolution would be.

@tobbycat replied to your post:

i follow so many arknights blogs at this point i didnt even realize it was you

the greatest tragedy of arknights is how good it is. it's been my go-to "keep me entertained while i exercise" game for months now. [standard warning still applies: it is a gacha game, so if gambling gives you trouble, i wouldn't recommend it. it's easy for me to avoid the slot mechanic for months at a time and only pull when there's a character i really want. know yourself.]

why?

  • the worldbuilding. arknights takes everything but the kitchen sink, throws it in hideo kojima's blender, and adds magical tech. i mean, i compare it to death stranding and metal gear solid as a joke, but i see a clear influence on both its writing and visuals. you've got reluctant soldiers fighting for the cure for a nano-disease. you've got a world marred by natural disasters, unethical science, and old wars. you also have dragons, eldritch stuff going on in the ocean, masquerade balls, and knight tournaments as a corporate-tainted sport. every corner of every country has something to dig into. half the fun of the story is seeing what they'll chuck in next.
  • despite what i said earlier about it being a gacha game, it's easy to stay free-to-play. i've never spent a cent on it. you earn the slot machine currency through ingame activities, and i'm told the odds are more generous than most others of its kind. [in fact, the game allows you to buy high-end characters outright with another free currency, which removes the gambling element.] if you're willing to save and be patient, you can still rack up a very comfortable roster of very powerful teammates.
  • but you don't have to. most of the game's stages are beatable with common, low-end squaddies, and if they're not, you're allowed to borrow a unit from the community. game articles tend to cite this as one of its biggest strengths. it feels like it wants you to win. the most punishing content is optional.
  • and, since it's me, the clothes. you can tell the artists are fashion nerds, because while most characters' clothes are fanciful, they look wearable. cosplayers say they're more comfortable than other costumes from that genre, and they'll mash up several aesthetics at once with interesting results. [seriously, if you've ever wondered what "knight sportswear" looks like, check it out.] there's even a teammate who used to edit a fashion magazine, which is a funny, meta nod to the game's cosmetic skins.

the "people with animal ears" thing is a little goofy for me, but like, i've watched anime before. i know the drill. i have no idea what the fandom is like, and frankly, i'm content. all i know is that it's fun and the girls are my sailor moon friends