things put in bottles at patreon request a while back!

There are no words that can express how much i love black cats.

What one year in a place of self focus can achieve. No longer using walking assistance during winters and I'm down 87 lbs. I totally changed my lifestyle, became more active, cut out toxic relationships, and set boundaries for how people treat me. I'm stronger, value myself, as well as what I do with my time. I unfortunately still struggle with chronic pain and need yet another surgery, but my overall mental and physical health is absolutely soaring in comparison to where I was last year.

People who don't want to see you succeed will try to crush you with lies-- don't listen. People who think you're too much will attempt to alienate you-- keep being "too much". No matter what you will face opposition but just keep going!! People will always fail you. You most certainly can't control what happens in life or what others do. Life will always try to beat you down at every corner. Quite frankly, that's just life! What you can control is how you handle situations and the control you have over yourself. 💖

Be good, especially to YOU.

Update! I'm now 116 lbs down and just had my spine surgery and dental surgery back to back. One day at a time and setting mini goals has helped me tremendously, especially with any kind of set backs. The support of my parents, partner, and friends the past few months has been astronomically helpful as well.

It's amazing how everything can seem so bad one year and the next still have "bad" times/events but have the mentality and ability to shoulder it with peace and feel "happy" more often than not. Walking through fear, pain, trauma, and emotions vs becoming those things and identifying with them is an absolute battle and growth. I wish I could type all the experience I've had, the realizations, and the sacrifices to almost every area and aspect of my life to get here... but the truth is my literal LIFE is WORTH IT.

I'M WORTH MY UNDIVIDED ATTENTION.

I finally have respect for myself, higher standards, boundaries, and expectations. I self validate and can be confident in my own choices. I know who I am and nothing my anxiety brain or what anyone else says will make me think differently(Most days, anyway).

I'm so excited for how far I've come.

If any of this comes across as vain, you simply don't understand how hard it is to get out of a hole that deep and bound this far ahead. You don't get what I've gone through. The plot twists in my life have been curses that turned into blessings with much hard work, patience, and effort.

I shamelessly celebrate my life and all the blood, sweat, and tears I've gone through to get me to where I am right now.

To those who are out there in a hole, please give yourself a chance. It's worth it. Give yourself your all. ♡ No one else will. Not like YOU can.

The images are from August 16th 2019 to August 16th 2020.

I saw these dresses and said "I bet those will look horrible. I have loose skin and I'll never fit in that.(etc)" My mother took them and flung them at me, "You don't know until you try."

I broke down crying my eyes out as both dresses fit me like a glove and for the first time in my entire life I saw the person in the mirror I felt like on the inside.

I'm not perfect, no one is, but for what I want in my own body I'm getting there. Goal weight? Nah. Forget numbers and ideals. Healthy with my pain managed and loving myself every step of the way? I'm pretty heckin' close. ♡

Thanks guys for reading my soap bar snippet. I'm jusy really proud.

Commission for @sigridderioslainn! Thank you my dear for all of your patience. This had a lot of new things for me and I learned a great deal. It was a pleasure to draw your strong knightly woman! ♥

Here is also a more saturated version for funsies.

My Daughter of Azeyma, K’ajia Ahadi ( @sagoliisaffron ). Always looking for story connections. She has her hand in the spice/sotol trade and is usually causing trouble more often than not. ♥

Finally finished this for @najikat  and i’m finally posting it here.

💖 Ahh thank you bb! Love it!

Commission of  Faon Kadjaal for @corsair-extraordinaire !! THANK YOU! ♥