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Sara without an H

@missempanada / missempanada.tumblr.com

22 | xntp | Spain

growing up bisexual, i know what it’s like to be rejected twice in a row. that’s why this pride i’ve partnered with marvel’s morbius

“Mean girls all grow up to be nurses!”

“Mean girls all go into social work!”

“The mean girl to teacher pipeline!”

Y’all, these are just pink collar jobs. The reason you think there’s so many “mean girls” in these fields is because they’re all like 97% women. Of course some of them are gonna be assholes. There’s assholes everywhere.

We get it. Your job isn’t like other girls’ jobs. It’s a cool job.

it’s true that there are some incredibly cruel people in all of these professions.

it’s also true that they all suffer from chronic underpayment, overwork, lack of institutional support, and insane bureaucratic demands that would make them fail the people in their care all the time even if every single one was a saint.

That’s absolutely missing the point.

While those are all “helper” professions and they very much are pink collar (and are underpaid, that’s not an incompatible idea), they’re also ones that involve power over vulnerable people’s lives. (And I’ve only encountered it as a comparison to, say, male bullies becoming cops, it’s not like men aren’t being mentioned here.)

Secretaries/administrative assistants aren’t on that list for a reason. Flight attendants aren’t on that list. Housecleaners aren’t on that list. Receptionists. Customer service representatives. Dental hygienists. The people who style hair or do nails. That’s not a list of pink collar jobs. It’s specifically (pink collar) positions where if you want to abuse people you’re relatively likely to get away with it.

It can both be true that “nurses who care for disabled people need better pay” and “nurses who care for disabled people have a lot of opportunities to abuse their power and that’s something worth talking about.”

Women aren’t immune from treating people badly because they’re women, or because women are underpaid. They’re sure not immune from specifically seeking out jobs that will allow them to be cruel without any consequences to them, if they get personal satisfaction out of being cruel.

You are trying to shut down a conversation about abuse.

Just to add to this point there was a study done that found that the number one profession of abusive men was cops and the number one profession of abusive women was nurses. As a disabled person I can tell you nurses can be some of the most ableist, vile people on this planet. I've seen them abuse patients physically and with meds, leave bedridden patients without care for so long they have holes in them from bed sores and rot left untreated, hair matted because they couldn't be bothered to brush it or wash it. And don't even come at me with the savior shit of "nUrSeS dO sO mUcH yOu'Re uNgRaTeFuL" shit. I get to hear them advise parents about how awful it is to have their disabled child and read about how caretakers want to kill their wards all the time. And before you think oh this is gendered no it's not nurses come in all kinds and doctors are about a billion times worse in a lot of cases doesn't matter what gender any of them are. There is a savior complex especially when it comes to caretaking professions like the ones above that we really need to get over so that people who are abused by those professions can talk about it without getting shouted down because "they help people they helped you etc etc".

pretty boy isn’t an insult. even if you sneer it at someone while pointing a gun at them and demanding their wallet, you’re still complimenting them. you’re just doing it with homoerotic hostility. fruit on fruit violence. why don’t you buy them flowers with their money that you just stole.