my favorite scene in LotR as a kid was when Sam started miserably freestyling in the tower of Cirith Ungol and the only reason he ever found Frodo was because he deliriously tried to join in

…i did read some of the novels, but i couldn’t get through them entirely…

…and so i genuinely have no idea whether or not this is serious. coz i mean, obviously, it could be a joke. but it could also have legitimately happened. people who have only seen the films underestimate the amount of random things that happen in the books that could come off as utterly silly and ridiculous if removed from their context.

Haha, well, it is pretty much what happens. Sam is looking for Frodo in the tower of Cirith Ungol and is despairing that he will ever find him. He sits down and does what any self-respecting Tolkien character does during their moments of hopelessness and bursts into song.

It’s a really good song (ten year old Ship had it memorized) and as he begins the refrain a second time, he hears Frodo’s voice answering weakly from above. Frodo is poisoned and despairing and beaten but he is still a Hobbit and cannot resist a singalong even while on the brink of death.

Rating band names by my likelihood to obey them as commands

Train: 6/10. Not very specific, but regardless of context, I do need to do it more. However, I dislike effort.

Maroon 5: 2/10. Not sure what I am marooning five of, but it seems kind of impractical to do remotely, and I don’t particularly want to be stuck on an isolated coast with these five entities.

Journey: 6/10. Only if I’m not tired.

OK Go: 5/10. I’m a big fan of leaving situations. However, if I am already unburdened by the horrors of situations, going might bring me INTO a situation, and that’s the opposite of what I want.

Fall Out Boy: 4/10. I don’t like conflict for no reason, but thanks for the gender!

Walk Off The Earth: 0/10. Gravity makes this difficult.

Elbow: 11/10. I am always ready to commit violence with my bones.

Meet Me @ The Altar: 9/10. Like the wedding type or the ritual sacrifice type? Either way, I should change outfits first.

Dropkick Murphys: 1/10. I only know one Murphy who I would want to dropkick, but she’s probably old enough now for that to be immoral.

Mother Mother: 8/10. I’m told I have a chronic case of mom friend.

Panic! At The Disco: 7/10. The disco is difficult to find these days, but I am constantly in a state of near-panic, so I think I could make it work given the opportunity.

Rise Against: Not sure what we’re rising against, but I’m typically down for a good rebellion. 8/10

Smash Mouth: 9/10. Smash someone’s mouth? With what? My fist? My own mouth? I’m usually down for one or the other.

Seal: 3/10. Not very specific. I’ve licked too many envelopes in the past month and I have no desire to repeat the experience.

WALK THE MOON: 3/10. I do want to do this. However, my opportunities to do so have been severely limited by NASA’s security.

Spoon: 9/10. Yeah, I’ll cuddle.

Foster The People: 7/10. Depends on the people.

Kiss: 9/10. Depends on who or what I am kissing, but usually there’s someone around who is up for it. If not, I will kiss the nearest stuffed animal on their soft little head.

Cage The Elephant: 0/10. Cruel, unethical, and unwise. How dare you.

Rage Against The Machine: 1000/10. Fuck yeah, I will.

Imagine Dragons: 1000000/10. Ohohoho, don’t mind if I do.

there’s no way

I’m crying

my friend who works in theatre just pointed out to me that WICKED is still showing tonight and the first line of that musical is "GOOD NEWS! SHE'S DEAD!" i really don't know how they're gonna work around that one

Important update

Im not my blorbo's defence lawyer. I'm their rich mom at parent night and for the money I'm paying this place, my little darling treasure gets to bite as many classmates as they like

recommending media to people not on the basis of "it's gay" because that could honestly mean almost anything but with the much more informative and enticing promise that there are two men with something really really really really really wrong with them

diversity win! this time it's two WOMEN. and YES, there are more things wrong with them than you could possibly imagine!

my friend who works in theatre just pointed out to me that WICKED is still showing tonight and the first line of that musical is "GOOD NEWS! SHE'S DEAD!" i really don't know how they're gonna work around that one

Maybe tumblr isn’t the best news source, but it is the funniest

John Boyega Answers the Web’s Most Searched Questions | WIRED

okay here’s my favorite ship dynamics or whatever

the chris pine thing is so funny

like here's chris pine living his absolute best life reading books and loving film and definitely not writing erotica and he's dropped into a movie that seems like it's going to be fine like you've got florence pugh and former boy band superstar harry styles and nick kroll (??) and shia labeouf (?????) but whatever it's fine olivia wilde is directing except whoops she falls in love with harry styles and pisses off her boyfriend (ex boyfriend) who's been having his post-snl renaissance with an apple whatever tv show and so then olivia gets served custody papers while she's on stage at a film convention and then it turns out florence pugh is actually friends with jason sudeikis and was going to cameo on ted lasso because florence's ex (zac braff???) was directing some of it and here's chris pine and living his best life but he's in a movie where the director is dating the male lead and the female lead isn't talking to the director because of the everything and then shia laboeouf leaves the film and it's probably because he's a pos and the director implies it's because he's a pos but then shia posts a vague video showing olivia wilde calling florence pugh miss flo and it's from month's ago over nothing but it's chaos and it's the venice film fest and you're chris pine and you're trapped in venice with these people and harry styles kisses nick kroll on the lips and harry styles is saying the movie is a movie that feels like a film like a real film and florence pugh is fucking gone and it's just you and then harry styles spits on you (????) and it's caught on film and you're chris pine and all you wanted was to be in a movie and write some erotica on the side

this is exactly how this scene went and no one can convince me otherwise

The progression of the first few episodes of Leverage is so fucking funny bc it's like:

Episode 1- fairly standard pilot, does a lot of legwork of establishing what the show is about and who the characters are, sets up the series well

Episode 2- the US government is inherently corrupt senators are bought and sold at the will of corporate interests

Episode 3- Eliot is a horse girl

remember when you were 10 and you would hang out with your friends in order to Look At The Computer together like you went to their house and experienced the information superhighway together. and then leave

How fucking old are you people?

normal amount

flips the fishbowl like an hourglass

He’s literally me

This man would have done numbers on Tumblr

My roommates boyfriend is a cis male business student who is still figuring out the whole "having a trans partner" thing. He struggles with the whole they/them thing but we don't really mind because the boy is clearly trying is heart out, and we all appreciate that.

He recently told me that he puts "nonbinary" on his insurance forms because, and I quote "they give you a lower premium if you're not a man."

He thought it was funny in a "I found a fun insurance loophole that I shall share with these be-prononed folks!" Kinda way.

I was losing my shit because this cis man is literally Transgender for insurance reasons.

Also I have absolutely zero idea if being nonbinary actually gets you lower premiums but he told me that was true and thats funny enough for me.

[Image: tags that say, "#what do you identify as? #insurance fraud". End description]

dream on his way to meet hob gadling every 100 years