TUMBLR peeps be like

This but I also am truly obsessed with myself

babe are you okay? u watched a movie and didnt reblog its gifs onto your blog? just thought i’d ask …

that’s just a regular platypus???

PERRY THE PLATYPUS ?!?!

I work in retail and I long for the day I don’t have a blackout card before lunch.

Either wear it properly or stay home. -.-

Someone should add “The Bolsonaro” when the mask just goes over your eyes

I have an absolutely horrible addition which is that before the mall closed my husband witnessed a woman walk in wearing a mask with a hole cut in the front because “we’re required to wear masks but it’s easier to breathe this way.”

should i get my life together or should i just keep being sexy and chaotic

Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.

i thought id try my hand at one of those motivational pictures of nature with google text over it

oh u like me?? funny .. i didn’t see ur pupils dilate??

employer: so how do you like working here!

me:

a cat: *touches me with its small hand* me: *eyes tearing up* thank you

me: *makes an unoriginal and unfunny shittypost*

my three loyal followers: