Prosperity gospel christians when you remind them Jesus literally said no rich people go to heaven

@apocrypals

It’s been twenty-five years of Joyce!  That’s a whole dang quarter of an entire-ass century!  And so:

We’ve put a whole buttload of Joyce on a poster.

She’s been a college student, a SEMME agent, a college student again, and then a college student with glasses!  Just running that whole gamut.

This 11″x17″ cardstock gloss poster will be signed and numbered.  It’ll come to you in a big flat cardboard envelope.  Limited to just 75 pieces!  Get ’em while they’re hot adorkable.

Roomies! is 25 years old today. I made a art.

is germany okay

oh scheiße

This isn’t quite how I imagined the second coming of Christ.

What makes this funnier is that I’m pretty sure that’s at the station for cologne cathedral

It is and everytime I see that hole I think of this video

Remembered to check at the station today and report that

The structural stigmata are still there

@apocrypals

see this is why you get Simon of Cyrene to carry the cross for you

Early Christianity was funny. Imagine being some random Hun trader who wanders into Byzantium and seeing a statue of a dude holding his own skin.

"Oh he's like, your god of leather working? That makes sense."

"Man, you guys must really hate leather workers."

I do the midweek service booklet for my church, which includes a biography and picture (photo, icon, stained glass, whatever I can find) of the saint of the day. Last week it was Bartholomew, and let me tell you, finding an image to use that wasn't nightmare fuel was a challenge. The images of him holding up his own skin (while somehow still having skin on) were bad enough but the sculpture of Bartholomew just standing there with NO skin on and looking like the most fucked up overjacked bodybuilder you can possibly imagine was really...something.

I mean Saint Tits on a Plate and Saint Shot Full of Arrows are pretty bizarre but Bartholomew is in a whole different league.

Here I made a cover for your church service booklet

@apocrypals

https://apocrypals.libsyn.com/41-neo-mary-is-about-to-e-x-p-l-o-d-e-the-questions-of-bartholomew

okay i was getting completely thrown until i realized this was about some random saint guy, because for several brow-furrowing moments i was like "the early church thought jesus christ was skinned?!?!?!?! how'd that never come up before" but then i read through more competently, and did some googling, and WHY AM I DOING THIS WHILE I AM EATING

why

this rules

Yeah dude who do you think catches your freshly cut salmon

the bear catching your salmon

imagine watching Star Wars in theaters in 1977 and pointing at Darth Vader boarding a ship with Stormtroopers and then choking some guy, and exclaiming THAT’S CLEARLY JESUS CHRIST, THAT’S WHY I’M INTO THIS

Love Star Wars. Love the Bible. I love the story about how Jesus *checks notes* cut off his son’s hand.

remember when satan took jesus out into the desert for 40 days to tempt him and satan was like “hey murder these younglings” and then jesus murdered them and then john the baptist cut off his arms and legs

@apocrypals

i guess when apocrypals reblogs your own stuff you should also reblog it again

tfw you contemplate your ex-husband, wilbur weston, with icy contempt

also been like… meticulously screenshotting convos with my boyfriend for two months because i felt like maybe i was exaggerating how often he did one specific thing but no

The Jetsons takes place in 2062, and George Jetson is 40 years old, which means that somewhere right now George Jetson is being conceived.

Actually, Google tells me George Jetson’s birthday is August 27, which means his parents are going to get successfully nasty this year’s Thankgiving Weekend.

Mark your calendars.  

Soon, folks. Soon. The Georgening approaches.

Happy George Jetson’s Conception Eve 

happy george jetson egg fertilization

happy george jetson is an embryo

happy george jetson is an inch long and has eyes 

happy george jetson is almost there, just rapidly putting his lungs and brain together and making sure fat goes where it needs to, one month to go

Hey uh

Sorry I’ve been gone a while

But I’m out quite a bit of money

Anything you can do to help would be great, thanks

So long as I am, unaccountably, prodding at this place again, I do still have about a thousand dollars of debt I could use help clearing up. 

Random Old Comic: Branding, Part I https://www.toyboxcomix.com/2020/11/02/branding-part-i/ Branding, Part I

okay so 4k upscales sometimes make things worse

Too me fair this is less a remaster upscale and keep just an image smoother.

Suddenly I remember that post talking about how game developers back in the pixel days accounted for crt screen fuzz and used it to their advantage in making everything look better. I can't find it atm but Google got my back.

This isn't quite the same thing. Beast Wars often looks way better when it's clearer and sharper! I published this example on Tumblr because it was a rare example that making the image clearer and sharper exposed all the weaknesses. Like, when things are fuzzy (and also it's a split second of models smashing into each other), you can't tell that actually it's like a dozen models all clipping through each other while all their spines break.

But!

Often sharper means much nicer.