Avatar

IIIII'VE GOT NO FRIEEENDS

@hellonheelys / hellonheelys.tumblr.com

And neither do u
Avatar

its gonna be unreal funny when absolutely nothing happens tomorrow

Avatar
sophietwilight

longtime users after december 17th:

Our gods are not dead.

The old spirits never vanished. They were never driven out mass chritianization. Instead they were masked. They were given cloth and cross and called saints. They took our holy days, our symbols, and gave them a foreign name, a false origin. No, our gods were not killed. Their stories live in the very fabric of our culture, hidden away from their children. So open your eyes, tear away the veil, and behold the old gods.

Me: I love Smash! It’s such a fun PARTY game! :)

Competitive Smash Player Still Using a Gamecube Controller in 2018:

image

Listen I’m still pissed that Smash which started as a fun party brawling game got co-opted by a bunch of dick bag “git gud” assholes who literally took it and tried to turn it into every other fighting game out there.

I just wanna point out that all the “No items, stock only, no stage effects” crew all are complete trash at the game. They’re great at FIGHTING GAMES, but complete Garbage at Smash Bros. Because instead of trying to learn the game, learn to play around the items, learn which stages do what, they just turn it all off (when you first start the game all the items and stage effects are on and you can’t turn them off in any of the modes except multiplayer melee).

And then if you do wanna play with items they try to shame you and claim that you’re “ruining the game” or “cheating” because “you can’t win without using items.” Guess what asswipe the intention is to play with the items that’s why they’re their in the first place for free with the base game.

It’s not my fault you had to dumb down the game to succeed cause you don’t know how to use the fire flower or metal bunny ears correctly.

lmao I love this reply I get so heated about this but I’ve never put it into words. this is a hill I will die on

Avatar

truth coming out of her well to shame mankind (tumblr safe version)

Avatar
crewdlydrawn

This is it… this is the height of what memes and memetic culture can do and the purpose they can serve, and why it’s so important to have this freedom of expression and exchange. Protest, reference, the instant connection of ideas, heavy weighted messages conveyed by the simplest of means. This image speaks volumes about the state of internet politics right now, and it does so by omitting the most important and recognizable part of itself.

Also, look at the quality here and the effort the artist put into making Truth’s erasure so disturbingly seamless. 

What true love looks like.

OKAY SO I had a coworker who was otherwise a standard clueless Straight White Guy, but this dude loved his wife and he knew her real good. And his wife LOVES shitty grocery store icing. So the first thing she’d always do with any cake is shove her fingers into the corner and scoop off whatever abomination of a flower was on there and eat it off her fingers. SO THIS DUDE GOES TO THE STORE AND HAS THEM MAKE A WHOLE CAKE OUT OF FROSTING Brings it home to his wife for her birthday She shoves her fingers into it and then they just keep going FROSTING ALL THE WAY DOWN He said the look on her face was the best thing he’d ever seen in his life It gives me hope that even a clueless Straight White Guy knew and loved his wife enough to give her the perfect birthday present cake frosting abomination

And I love to imagine the conversation he had to have with the grocery store bakery.

That’s disgusting, what a good husband

things that still freak me out: those sinks americans have in their kitchens that you can destroy stuff with

Avatar
rorgers

wait… y’all don’t have garbage disposals? 

Avatar
one-fandomnerd-to-rule-them-all

No, we just have a garbage can, nice and friendly, not trying to eat my fucking hand

Are they real? I mean, I assume the films aren’t making them up. But WHY.

Avatar
anderz-zombieslayer

So you ain’t got rotten rat attracting food in your garbage can. Did the black plague teach y'all nothing?

I was a little late to the Hozier party. I mean I loved Take Me To Church and I laughed at the dark forest prince memes and I even reblogged them, but I figured it was all kind of a tumblr exaggeration.

Then I listened to his album, wherein he sings about:

  • decomposing in a field with his love and getting eaten by foxes
  • being dug out of the dirt by his love, who he implores to kiss him “like real people do”, implying that neither of them are real people
  • observing the world as an outsider (“happy to lie back, watch it burn and rust; we tried the world, good god it wasn’t for us”)
  • rising from his grave to crawl home to his love
  • “the bog man”

and I realized, no, he’s just Like That.

are you telling me all of those are real songs and not just aesthetics tumblr made up

Listen, I didn’t believe it either, but that’s absolutely what I’m telling you.

Avatar

listen you all can bitch about detective pikachu all you want im just happy it isnt afraid to just have a story set in the pokemon setting that doesnt do the usual thing video game movies do and provide some kind of “explanation” bullshit ie. mario traveling to another dimension where dinosaur people rule or chun-li spending an entire movie learning how to throw a fireball or whatever the FUCK sonic is doing

Avatar

for the love of fucking god let me reblog ads tumblr

is that a fucking game boy cartridge case?

Avatar

this is a legit lifehack because keeping a condom in your wallet is bad news. the friction from it being in your pocket or jostled around wears down the latex and can cause it to tear. if you keep one on you in a gameboy cart case that won’t be an issue because no one will have sex with you