here's a transcript:
>walking home from a party late one evening >several guys were following me, as my drunk ass managed to piss them off by existing >try to walk faster, to no avail, as I'm drunk as shit >catch me in some random student neighbourhood >oh shit, my ass is about to be beaten >still in talking phase >lights flick on in a house >three guys in full musketeer garb walk out >leader is some blond guy with a beard, eyepatch, and some weird-ass accent >"What sort of ruffians would be accosting someone outside our residence? Stand and deliver!" >guys start yelling at them to fuck off, that I deserved to get my ass beaten >"Very well, then. Draw steel, you blackguard!" >all three of them draw rapiers on their belts >guys run >"I know not why those foul men sought your harm, but come and tell us the tale, stranger!" >spend remainder of evening drinking mulled wine with lunatics >bunch of Swedish re-enactors live there >blond guy is actually missing an eye; lost it in an machine shop accident >stagger home completely drunk with a hat
I had no idea people like that existed. Or had the money to rent a house.
in addition to two comments reading "FUCKING EPIC" and "THIS A THOUSAND TIMES THIS" op elaborated further in another post:
Holy shit, is this still being posted?
I figure I owe /tg/ a bit of an update on these guys.
Their leader, O he of one eye and little common sense, nearly had his visa revoked for these kinds of shenanigans. One too many arrests meant that his right to stay in the country was contested, and he had to go to court to defend himself and prevent his visa from being revoked.
I was his ride to court, and had to testify to the board that he shouldn't be deported for lack of common sense or social normality.
His defense? A written speech, about three pages long, about the rights of man, the education he has received here, and the opportunities for a one-eyed machinist. The spirit of his crimes were all in defense of people who would otherwise suffer. For other witnesses, he had some of the random people he'd helped out, including one memorable point where a woman, nearly on the verge of tears, pointed out how he'd taken on a guy threatening to rape her and carrying a knife by whipping out a fencing saber, disarming him, and mocking him in his thick Swedish accent so that the girl could call the cops. Something like a dozen people all showed up, explaining how this dude, despite his eccentricities, made the country better.
He was not deported, and lives here to this very day, stalking the streets in musketeer garb, rescuing drunks, and dispensing his own brand of justice.
Oh my God
Mother and Calf. Grand Teton National Park. Wyoming. It was truly a special moment watching this Cow Moose and her Calf cross this river with The Grand in the background. (at Grand Teton National Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/B10KgU9gpTb/?igshid=1hsdkigkhqazy
aw man... i love threepio and now i kinda wanna see an au where his memories WERE preserved somehow. partitioned away before the memory-wiping process, maybe, or perhaps he leaves copies of them with artoo...
You know, I get a lot of variations on asks like this every time I make a post about Threepio and his memory wiping.
I get people suggesting that Artoo must have made a backup of all Threepio’s memories. People suggesting that Anakin built in some kind of backup program, or some kind of work around in Threepio’s programming, that would preserve his memories if they were ever wiped and create a file that could be recovered. People suggesting that there was a failsafe somewhere in Threepio’s programming that the memory wipe didn’t touch. And so on and so forth. I have, at this moment, seven separate asks in my inbox to this effect, as well as several more comments on the original post.
And I get it. I do. We don’t want Threepio’s memories to be gone. Maybe even moreso, we don’t want the heroes we love to be responsible for the permanent destruction of Threepio’s previous self. In all honesty, fans see Threepio as more of a person than the characters in the story do, and we don’t want to think about the fridge horror of memory wiping, and...yeah. I get it. I absolutely understand the urge to headcanon our way out of this.
But I also just...don’t think that urge actually holds water in the canon universe as we have it. As an AU idea, sure. But in canon no.
There is not a single character in the original six Star Wars films who expresses any kind of sentiment that could be interpreted as an argument for full or even partial droid rights. Not a single character, and that includes the droids themselves. The closest any of the characters get to something like that is probably Anakin himself, and to a lesser extent Luke, but even they are only really concerned with the personhood of individual droids they know and care about, and at no point do they universalize those thoughts to encompass all droids, or even all droids of a certain type (astromechs or protocol droids, for example).
I think the most that makes sense to suggest, in canon, is that Anakin and Padme never would have wiped Threepio or Artoo’s memories so long as they owned them. (And they did own them. They may have regarded them like people, and even considered them somewhere between pets and friends, but there are no characters in the films, not even Anakin or Luke, who would ever have suggested that a droid could own themself, or should have complete autonomy in their life. That’s just not something on anyone’s radar in canon.) And because they never planned to sell Artoo and Threepio, it was enough simply to choose never to have them memory wiped. It just doesn’t make sense, given the attitude toward droids displayed by the characters in particular and the universe in general, to think that they would have made any kind of contingency plan to prevent their droids from hypothetically being wiped in the future.
#this is one of those Star Wars things I try hard NOT to think about, #because it's absolutely heartbreaking, #and it's difficult I think for most of us to really wrap our minds around the concept that the Threepio Anakin and Padme knew is dead, #because he has the same voice and mannerisms and personality; all the same likes and dislikes, #but memories are what truly define us; what make us who we are, #it's not like amnesia where an organic person has a chance of regaining their memories, #the memories that he lived are gone, #so while the core traits of Threepio remain it's like he's a different soul, #and now my heart hurts a lot
I know everybody wants to headcanon their way out of that. But for me personally, I just don’t think any of those headcanons are sufficient, and they don’t address the reality that the Star Wars universe is just...entirely unconcerned with the ethics of droid memory wiping. As much as it hurts not to, I just can’t imagine that anyone would have planned ahead sufficiently to preserve Threepio’s memories, because there is literally no one in this story who devotes any amount of real thought to what it means to wipe a droid’s memory.
This is also why the droid revolution is only a thing in one of my AUs. Because most of my AUs are focused, to a greater or lesser degree, on Anakin, and I genuinely cannot imagine Anakin coming to the realization he has about droids in DAV in any universe where he is not “more machine than man” himself. He finally sees the droids as fully people in DAV in part because he first sees himself as a droid. And yes, that’s fucked up. That’s kinda the point. Because there is no basis whatsoever in the culture of Star Wars canon for any organic person to view a droid as a fully realized person in their own right. Even as a slave, Anakin tells Threepio, “I’ll make sure Mom doesn’t sell you or something.”
Fall colors are already spreading across Alaska. It’s a great time to be a photographer there, spotting wildlife and snapping scenery. Photographer Nate Luebbe says “Lake Clark is by far my favorite National Park. Massive, glaciated peaks tower over turquoise lakes, while bears, eagles and moose roam the forests. There’s nowhere else I’ve been that has such amazing photographic potential in every direction.” Photo at Lake Clark National Park courtesy of Nate Luebbe.
Well DAMN. Luke is serving sass big time here, Padme would be proud.
Quick research is telling me Mike James Horgan!
In your au's, did Anakin program Amatakka into C3PO when he built him? Because I kind of want to see Luke's wft reaction when the protocol droid from the wealthy "Core-worlder" planet of Alderaan, of the Royal household no less, suddenly responds to Luke in the secret slave only language. Or even more, Threepio quietly but unthinkingly translating something Luke is saying to Leia, and providing cultural context, unintentionally being a bridge to the culture for her.
Anakin did program Threepio to speak Amatakka, yes. But Threepio underwent a full memory wipe and factory reset at the end of ROTS, which means that OT Threepio not only doesn’t speak Amatakka, but isn’t even aware that it’s a language that exists.
Threepio is physically identical to a number of other protocol droids we see, which likely means that Anakin didn’t build him from scratch, but rather refurbished an existing protocol droid. My personal headcanon is that he found the shell of a defunct protocol droid in Watto’s junk shop and rebuilt him (made him stronger, faster, better…).
Who Threepio was before Anakin rebuilt him will probably never be known. I don’t think he has any memory of his previous existence, and it may not have been much, as he was likely regularly memory wiped in his previous life. (That seems to be common practice with droids in the GFFA, and maybe especially with droids who are involved with potentially sensitive work, as protocol droids would be.)
The droid that Anakin brought to life, though, was an fully realized individual. Shmi and Anakin allowed and encouraged Threepio to define himself, and they certainly never would have considered wiping his memory. He spoke Amatakka with them on Tatooine, and retained that knowledge after he went to live with Padme. (In fact, Padme may have learned as much Amatakka from Threepio as she did from Anakin, and possibly more, since she saw Threepio every day.)
When Bail Organa had Threepio’s memory wiped at the end of ROTS, he was given a full factory reset, which meant that he retained his knowledge of every language and mode of communication he’d originally been programmed with…but not Amatakka. Amatakka is a secret language, and therefore not part of any standard programming package. It’s very existence is secret, so Threepio isn’t even aware that it’s something he’s missing.
I’d like to think that, at some point either during or after the OT, Luke programmed Threepio to speak Amatakka. But there’s no way for Threepio to know that’s something he once knew and lost, and, unless Anakin’s ghost told Luke, there’s no way for Luke to know Threepio once spoke his language.
And knowing a language doesn’t necessarily mean knowing all the cultural context that goes with it. If Luke does program Threepio with Amatakka, that won’t mean Threepio suddenly regains his memories of his time with Shmi and Anakin and the culture of the Quarters in which he had his formative, now lost, years. Those memories are gone, and there is no way to recover them. Whatever knowledge Threepio has about Amavikka culture in the OT and beyond will be filtered through Luke’s knowledge, and not through the lens of the Mos Espa slave quarters.
for a droid to be programmed in Amatakka, the language programming had to either already exist, or be created for the purpose. Which either means that someone decided to create an entire dictionary and grammar chip and disperse it widely enough that it was available to a less-than-nine-year-old boy, or that baby Anakin programmed it himself.
Which means that baby Anakin sat down at one point and programmed an entire language translation, including cultural context. Grammar, parts of speech, vocabulary, down to a basic enough level that a computer program, of all the idiotic things that exist, was able to construct legitimate sentences from it.
Now, assuming that he did this, we have several corollaries:
1. Anakin is a word nerd and able to utilize multiple languages to make jokes, and doubtless incorporates them into his puns.
2. Baby Anakin looked at this protocol droid that he wanted to help his mom just as much as it was possible to help her, and he saw all the languages it could do, and he resolved that he was going to do whatever it took to make it also speak their language. On some level, this was making the droid culturally his family, which is not really surprising for baby Anakin. On some other level, it was also recognizing that droids are also enslaved. Artoo would love Amatakka, but it’s Threepio who had it.
3. Baby Anakin sat down for the months or more likely years it would take to make this dictionary/grammar and did so. That’s an incredible degree of attention span for a nine-year-old - although also one who is simultaneously building a protocol droid from scrap-and-scratch and a pod racer from, most likely, also mostly-scrap.
4. Threepio was originally programmed with not just Amatakka, but nine-year-old Amatakka. Fart jokes. Simple sentence structures. Little to no knowledge of swearing. Whenever Threepio was around, no matter where Anakin was, Shmi could hear Anakin in his voice, his phrasing. Wherever Threepio went, there too was Anakin. That’s all very pleasant for Shmi; but in some sense, it’s also his verbal soul, pre-Jedi, preserved in dictionary form. He passed that to Padmé, whether he realized he was doing so or not. Padmé could learn a lot about Anakin from Threepio.
5. Whatever Luke puts into Threepio for Amatakka, it’s not just a regional variation, it’s a generational one, and an age gap, and a personality difference. The Amatakka that Luke programs - if Luke is even the sort of person who sits down and writes a vocabulary and grammar for a language that people oughtn’t know exists - will be strikingly different from whatever Amatakka Threepio spoke before.
6. Assuming that Luke is the sort of person who wrote a vocabulary and grammar for Amatakka just so that Threepio could speak it, at some point, at least in DAV-verse, adult Anakin is going to hear Threepio speak it, and it will be like coming home and seeing the house painted a different color, and having to wonder if that is, in fact, the color it always was?
:D :D :D
I am absolutely delighted that someone put all this together.
So: yes, you are absolutely correct, I 100% believe that baby Anakin sat down and created an Amatakka dictionary from scratch so that he could teach his new friend his language. And because, yes, on some subconscious level he did perceive that Threepio was in the same situation as himself and his mother. That it was right for Threepio to speak Amatakka, to be part of the Amavikka community, because, well...he was.
I’d quibble a bit with the idea that Threepio’s Amatakka in the PT era is limited to baby Anakin’s vocabulary and understanding, though, for two reasons: 1) Shmi completed Threepio’s programming after Anakin left, and was probably involved with the project before he left too, so Threepio likely owes as much to her as to Anakin, and 2) Threepio is a fully sentient machine, and therefore both capable of and programmed to continue learning independently. And he’s a protocol droid specializing in languages, so he probably has a number of programs dedicated to language acquisition, as well as the ability to build a new dictionary etc when he encounters a new language.
All of which means that the Threepio of the OT could probably teach himself Amatakka, provided he became aware that it was a language that existed in the first place, and that he had a native speaker willing to assist him to some degree. So I think that if Luke were to teach him, it would probably look a lot more like that - because I agree with you, I can’t see Luke sitting down and creating an Amatakka dictionary and program just for Threepio. That’s the kind of nerdery that’s much more Anakin than Luke. But I can see Luke working with Threepio to help him create his own log for this new language.
But yes, this is the most important takeaway here: The Amatakka that Luke programs will be strikingly different from whatever Amatakka Threepio spoke before.
If I ever get to that point in DAV, I am probably going to have to dedicate an entire fic to the Anakin and Threepio reunion because there’s just...so much there. And it’s all painful. :(
Being in a long-term fandom really makes me wish we had like, Fandom Supreme Courts, just so that every time the same stupid discourse rears its ugly head for the umpteenth time in ten years, we can just be like, “Actually this argument was settled in the 2006 Fandom Supreme Court ruling in the case of AngelPotter vs. Xx_goth1c-r0se_xX, so everbody can shut up about it now.” Imagine the wank reduction.
If you think that would reduce the wank at all I’ve got some bad news for you about...kind of a lot of actual Supreme Court cases.