Draw this in your style challenge of @Anixie_art on instagram
TODAY IT’S A GREAT DAY BECAUSE IT’S MARCH 15th THE DAY WHEN DENZEL CROCKER LOST HIS HAPPINESS AND IT’S ALSO ANNOY SQUIDWARD DAY
Reblog if you miss these good modern cartoons that have ended
Anonymous asked:
Hello my name is Nancy :) I hope you can understand English! I'm searching for a very good friend named Eleftheria Karagianni / Psathidou who moved to Greece when we were about 11 years old. I just want to know, because who knows how she looks like now, if you lived in germany before and if you are the person I'm searching for. It would be nice if you replied :) have nice evening :)
OMG i’m sorry, actually i’m from mexico, but i hope you could find your friend! and i wanna know if you did
*walks into tumblr without making eye contact with anyone; grabs my bag and leaves*
theyellowbrickroad
Did I ever tell u guys about the time my ex legitimately thought he killed me with his dick???
theyellowbrickroad
Ok so picture this I’m 18 and excited about sex, trying out some new positions. We are having sex in a pretty similar position to this
And my pussy is so wet it might as well be a god damn Slip N Slide ok. And he’s pounding at it fast and hard but slips out and goes to go right back in… But something is wrong. He’s about to enter….
The. Wrong. Hole.
And my eyes widen, I go to shout “noooo!!!!” But it’s all happening too fast. He thrusts right into my unlubed asshole and I scream like murder and leap right up onto my feet.
We had only been dating a couple of months at this time and there was something very important he did not know about me: I am a chronic fainter. If I’m in pain or if I see my own blood, I will pass the fuck out. I get real quiet and turn to him and say, “I am going to pass out.”
He doesn’t know I’m serious, he thinks I’m just being emotional, and he’s like “no baby come here” but as he finishes that sentence i faint and my head ping pongs off my metal bed frame, onto the wall and then finally my whole body falls on the ground.
He has never seen anybody faint before and naturally assumes I’m dead. A couple minutes later I awaken to him sobbing into my naked chest. Like this motherfucker really thought he sent me to the grave with some accidental anal sex.
soorajmakhi
SIMONE I AM YELLING
katielittlejohn
Joining tumblr was worth it just to read this. I didn’t make a terrible mistake 9 years ago, after all.
