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月影

@elan-ra-blog / elan-ra-blog.tumblr.com

~ I'm ELMIRA & this is an untamed No.6 blog. I only post fanart authorized for share by the artists. Do not repost any image you see on this blog without permission. Do not reupload images from this blog to WeHeartIt.
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I hope you don't let those people who totally missed the point of your post get to you :( it isn't fair that others can ruin the fandom experience. I've always been a fan of you and thesexymaid and I hope you feel better soon

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This whole thing is literally the final straw for me. I am so sorry for putting you guys through this. I really can’t do it anymore. Too much is expected from just a few people in this fandom and then they are alienated for being ‘elitists” or some bullshit. I am tired. It’s been three years and I am really really tired. I have 95 pages of pixiv inbox messages from artists, filled with replies to the mails I’ve sent them for permission for posting their arts, old and new, growing everyday (though much less slowly now). I have a folder full of incomplete No.6 scripts left over from Project No.6 which everyone involved abandoned but me and thesexymaid before it was even half-way through. I have near 10K arts on my computer that I have to sort by artist so I know which art belongs to who just so I can source them easily. I have five Japanese to English and Japanese to Turkish translation websites bookmarked on my browser just so I can talk to the artists whose arts I wish to share with you. I go through the tags EVERY. DAMN. DAY. to make sure I don’t miss anything. I reblog all the new art. Try to read all the new fics. Do my best to answer everyone. Go through Twitter accounts of Hinoki Kino and Ishino and two dozen artists in case there is something, anything the fandom hasn’t seen yet. I have 25 thousand posts on this blog devoted only to No.6 and No.6 alone and 4K followers that chose to follow me over the course of three years. I wrote 14 fanfictions and tens of thousands of words in roleplaying for this fandom. These are my numbers. I have given my entire soul, my whole heart into this blog because it made me happy, it kept me focused, it kept me safe, it kept me alive. I have never loved a story as much as I love No.6. It has always been personal to me for reasons I cannot even begin to tell you. I found a job thanks to this story. I met three incredible people, all of whom helped changed my life drastically. I met the love of my life and a kind of friend you can only hope to find in your wildest dreams. No.6 changed my entire life in a way only miracles can change a person’s life. Three years in and I am spent. My blog is no longer mine but belongs to the fandom itself, it has been for a long time. It didn’t bother me before because I was allowed to be myself on my blog and I didn’t have to refrain from speaking my mind or daring to have feelings. Yuneyn says in her reply that her feelings are a reflection of many and she only happened to rant in reply to my post. Similarly, I came home and read hers, Ahiku’s and Vox’s replies and that was the final straw for me. Apart from Vox’s, neither Ahiku’s nor Yuneyn’s replies were antagonizing or disrespectful. But I am immeasurably tired of having my opinions and / or feelings being shut down every time I express a fraction of attachment or show any sort of nostalgia for the past of this fandom. Yes, I was here when most of you weren’t. Why is it so hard to accept there may have been people here before you, just as good as you are, that I’ve shared beautiful months with? Why am I, as a person, NOT allowed to cherish those moments and miss those people? I can count with the fingers of my single hand the number of times I’ve made a post about missing my old friends or the old artists, writers, fans. How can anyone look at my blog with 25 goddamn thousand posts, see only those handful of personal spills of nostalgia and tell me with a straight face that I never give any chance to the new in my longing for the old? Are you even serious? This will be my final post on Elanra. After this, the blog will be be inactive indefinitely. I will not password protect it or prevent access with a hiatus theme or anything. My blog has been a resource blog for many people for a long time, so I’ll let you use it as such. I truly apologize to anyone I might have offended unintentionally within these three years in the fandom. I still love No.6 more than anything and it kills me that I have to abandon this blog that I’ve given so much to but I really don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t. I know there are some of you following me who has been in love with No.6 for just as long as I have been, maybe even longer. And I know there are some among you who has just found out about the series and are still giddy with feels over the story. I always thought of the fandom exactly as this unassuming harmony of continual co-existence. I’ve never segregated among any sections of this fandom and even had many arguments with thesexymaid about my idealistic faith in it. I guess in short, I am just too hurt to keep doing this and Tumblr isn’t worth getting myself sick over. I have written ‘reunion will come’ with every NezuShi post I’ve made for three years and I still believe it will but maybe it’s better if I witness that on my own where I don’t have to feel guilty for my feelings. Please look after your fandom. Cherish your artists. Look out for each other. Don’t let unsourced arts spread around. Thank each other. Be excited. Don’t be afraid to think of the past, it’s in human nature to ‘remember’. It is okay to remember every now and then. My blog is yours.

iwatch-theworld made a very smart, well-written post that attacked the real problem and then was made too uncomfortable to leave it posted. This is the problem with, not some bullshit of new or old fans. It’s the fact that the fandom has become a mess of people all shoving their thumbs up their asses until someone else says something or tries to do something. This fandom itself is toxic as fuck, and it doesn’t matter if you’re new or old, what matters is that you are just as to blame for how it is as anyone else, and this whole idea of let’s pretend these people are the spokespeople of the fandom and fucking turn it burning them to make ourselves free of blameelanra and I are not the entire fucking fandom. WE HAVE FEELINGS AND WE MISS OUR FUCKING FRIENDS. ARE WE NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE FEELINGS ON OUR OWN GOD DAMN BLOGS? This is why I’ve gotten more and more hateful toward the No.6 fandom. The bad outweighs the good, and it has nothing to do with new or old, it has to do with the people now not giving it a sense of community. Do I love some people here? Yes. But I’ve always been able to hate more than I can love, and with elanra and I both going through personal issues but then constantly having to deal with this bullshit mentality, ha, it’s no wonder we both feel like the fandom is dead. There’s no heart to it anymore. Every single person who posted on elanra's personal post isn't some unknown person. You aren't working for our approval, so if you want to do something, fucking do it. I wasn't looking for approval when I started. No one starts out popular. Overall, yeah, this fandom is unwelcoming, but only to everyone who isn’t on the side of the people making everyone scared and feel unsure. Here I thought all those people were gone and we were on the mend. Guess not.

I honestly can’t make any new No.6 posts anymore.. there is no new content. Right now, the only on-going No.6 content I am following is the occasional red-eyes-gold-eyes arts and lookwrittenthings's The Best Laid Plans fic. The Pixiv tag is dead. All the major and minor artists of the fandom has moved on, included but not limited to Aruko, Lancha and even Zxs1103. Waka will sometimes succumb to her feels and draw something No.6 but its really really sad how little is left of the fandom that used to fill me with inspiration and excitement everyday. Every post that appears on my dash has either been posted by me or are things I've already reblogged several times… I can't give you guys anything new. Working two jobs and barely getting 5 hours of sleep a day, I can't do much anymore either OTL I still love No.6 as much as I did at the fandom’s creative peak. I will never get over it. I will never not be moved immensely with feeling at the sight of Shion and Nezumi and all the others I’ve grown to love so much.  I guess I just wanted to rant a little and express how lonely I feel lately in this fandom and how sad it is that everyone has left and is leaving and it’s of course natural, nothing is permanent and time stops for no one. I understand this as I have also moved on from countless things in my life but I am just so, so sad that this is happening with No.6… As childish as it may be and as idealistic as it may sound, I wish the No.6 fandom had stayed the same. It was home to me. I miss everyone so much...

yuneyn and ahikuboruchi, I just saw your replies to my little rant and I'd like to reply because you have both missed what my post was intended to express by a large margin  and took it as something entirely different. Nowhere in my post have I compared the "old fandom" to the "new one". I have not said anything about the current anything. I was talking about the content of my own blog and my personal feelings regarding people I used to talk to everyday. I was talking about not being able to talk to or share content from people like Aruko and Annamirka, Waka etc. I was talking about people leaving now as much as those that have already left. There was no distinction. Am I supposed to not give a damn about my friendships and the hardwork of people I admired just because they are not here anymore and that there are new people providing fanwork? What kind of mentality is that? If I didn't give a damn about the 'new fandom' why am I freaking out about every new fanart? Why do I try to read every new fanfic I come across? Why do I try my hardest to answer and help everyone who has questions that I see in the tags? To be honest, I am very upset that you have taken my post like a complaint about what the fandom 'is' now compared to what it 'was' then and completely disregarded the fact that I've been (from the start) keeping a close eye on both your blogs and sharing your content with great appreciation and respect. Ahiku, you are the most active Tumblr artist drawing for No.6 and I reblog nearly ALL of your art with great excitement. Yuneyn, I have read the majority of your fanfics and have had great pleasure discussing things with you .You are both people I've not only enjoyed being a part of the same fandom with but also people I respect. This never had anything to do with when you have joined this fandom or who had been here before you arrived. I am hurt that you made my personal post about missing people that have moved on about your not being appreciated in this fandom by the 'old fans' because you are a part of the 'new' in your opinion and the fact that you have decided to express your distaste regarding this on my post and thus, put yourselves and me on opposite ends. I do not appreciate this at all. Also, Vox, it's apparent you haven't even read my post before replying if you are honestly lecturing me about not appreciating red-eyes-gold-eyes. I honestly feel sorry at how devastatingly wrong you are. I am not acting like the fandom is dead. The sheer number of followers I have on this blog is enough proof that the fandom is greater than it has ever been. My post, again, was nothing but my expressing sadness about the way people move on, old or new, without distinction and about losing inspiration. I have been here for over three years and I have loved every single day I've spent fangirling over No.6 and conversing and sharing with the people that love what I love. I still do. Are you saying you want me to forget about the 'old fans' and stop talking about missing them just because 'new ones' are here? How is that going to assure 'new fans' about their permanence? How will that make anyone feel important when I change 'favorites' like I change underwear? 

I also need to point out that the language in your reply is exceptionally distasteful. If you don't know who Aruko and Lancha are (let's not even mention Zxs1103) you have absolutely no right to complain about people not paying any attention to you (which isn't even true) because you apparently pay none to anyone else. They aren't even 'old fans'. They have stopped posting No.6 arts just a few months ago. The former is an artist that has drawn over four hundred fanarts for this fandom while the latter is one of the most popular anime fanartists drawing for several fandoms whose last No.6 art was on August 19th. In short, I have noticed that whenever someone who has stayed in this fandom for a considerable amount of time expresses any sort of longing for certain people or a certain kind of content, their feelings get shut down by a group of people that call themselves 'the new fans' dubbing anyone else 'the old fans'. It is this group of people that draws a distinction between the fans. Our feelings, my feelings of attachment and deep appreciation for earlier content has nothing to do with my feelings for the later content. It is these people that make comparisons. It is these people that alienate the 'old fans'. It is these people that jump at every post of nostalgia and reminiscence with their latecomer complex and becoming the actual 'elitists' against those they accuse of being 'elitists'. 

I have personally shown nothing but excitement and support to any new provider of fanwork whom I had a chance to talk to. Ahiku, not only you are quite far from being a 'new fan' you are also not the only person who has tried to make attempts for this fandom. Before you, several others including me have tried countless things to encourage discussions among fans, bring them together and create together as a fandom. It didn't work out in the past for the same reason it doesn't work out now. And you know as well as I do that it has nothing to do with any discord between the old fans and the new. This is the reason so many of the older fans chose to fade out in the backdrop of things. This is the reason I've stopped making personal posts on my blog. This is the reason I can hardly bring myself to discuss anything on this blog anymore. You took my post, my personal post of longing of old friends and sadness for losing inspiration and used it to make a scene for your 'new vs. old fandom' war. I hope you got the attention you so desperately needed now and that my post was of help to you. 

Topics that will never die in the No.6 fandom:

  • Inukashi’s gender
  • Nezumi and Shion being in love
  • Where’s chapter 22 of the manga?
  • the needle was safu’s grandma’s!!1!!1!
  • safu was a thirsty bitch who tried to ruin nezushi 
  • NO.6 IS SHOUNEN-AI/YAOI LOLGAYBEES! it’s not shut up
  • reunionwillcome when will reunion come? where will reunion come? reunion plz.
  • oh my god do not talk to me about no.6 or i will cry on you for hours.
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jellyfishprincesse

and we can’t forget the ever popular “ummm i hate to break it to u guys but… NEZUMI WAS ABUSIVE!!” bullshit that riles up the fandom every few months 

..haha.. ha.. ha.. please never again.