i want you guys to GUESS what this anon says. because seeing this notification itself could not have prepared me for the full thing

all wonderful guesses!

but alas, no, it was:

As a biochem student and certified nerd, I feel the responsibility to bestow this knowledge upon as many people as I possibly can:

You do NOT need to "earn" meals through exercise.

You know why?

Because exercise only accounts for about 20% of your calories. The majority of the calories your body burns, it uses to keep itself alive. It uses them to power your brain and metabolism. In fact, your brain ALONE is responsible for spending about 20% of your calories.

Your BRAIN, just to keep itself going, uses up just as many (or even more!!!) calories than all the exercise you do.

Your RESTING metabolic rate is responsible for burning between 60 and 75% of your calories.

You don't just deserve food because you're working out. YOU DESERVE FOOD BECAUSE YOUR BODY NEEDS IT TO STAY ALIVE.

As a nutritionist, I confirm this is true

beast

guy at blizzard watching the companies stock tick down: its time for desperate measures [hits the big red OPERATION FURRY PORN button on his desk]

not even an actual foxgirl, just a human girl in a hat

for those keeping score, this means the japanese characters are a samurai, a ninja, and a foxgirl

you need to get it out of your mind that psychosomatic illness is just “making up symptoms” when it’s actually much more like your body is being actively poisoned by chemicals released from your brain

if you’re so stressed that you’re puking your guts up every morning, are unable to eat or keep anything down, you can’t look at light without feeling infinitely worse and feel exhausted and in pain all the time (or whatever your particular stress induced symptom set is) you’re not just feeling like that because you’ve willed it into being. your body is begging for relief from the constant barrage of stress hormones and it requires the fundamental source of stress to go away, not just distracting yourself from the symptoms

just because the root is psychological doesn’t mean the result isn’t an entirely physical process.

I’M

Dear (physically) abled people: the accessible bathroom stall is NOT for you.

And no, I don’t care if you’re neurodivergent.

Acceptable reasons to use the accessible bathroom stall:

Unacceptable reasons to use the accessible bathroom stall:

Let me emphasize: your panic attack, eating habits, social anxiety, or whatever, is not a justification for using up a limited resource that isn’t for you.

I do not care if you’re neurodivergent or mentally ill or whatever. You’re occupying a space that isn’t meant for you. You’re appropriating a finite resource that some people have no choice to need.

Physically disabled people, such as myself, are not just annoyed, but materially harmed by neurodivergent people who think they have the right to occupy the accessible stall for their panic attacks or what have you. We can get UTIs, other infections, rashes, and pain from not having access to a useable bathroom… waiting 20 minutes for you to eat your fucking salad in the accessible stall while we are in wet underwear/diapers is not ok.

Don’t use the accessible toilet if it’s not for you. End of story.

I originally said don't look at the notes but if you want a free blocklist of people who hate cripples the notes of this post bring them out like you wouldn't believe it. <3 I hate able-bodied people. <3

A sudden, terrifying thought

When you see an animal with its eyes set to the front, like wolves, or humans, that’s usually a predator animal.

If you see an animal with its eyes set farther back, though—to the side—that animal is prey.

Now look at this dragon.

See those eyes?

They’re to the SIDE.

This raises an interesting—and terrifying—question.

What in the name of Lovecraft led evolution to consider DRAGONS…

As PREY?

I know this isn’t part of my blogs theme but like this is interesting

i know this isn’t part of my blogs theme but like this is interesting

^Haiku^bot^8. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. | @image-transcribing-bot @portmanteau-bot | Contact | HAIKU BOT NO | Good bot! | Beep-boop!

@howdidigetinvolved

The eyes-in-the-front thing (usually) only applies to mammals. Crocodiles, arguably the inspiration for dragons, have eyes that look to the sides despite being a predator.

hey what up I’m about to be That Asshole

This isn’t a mammalian thing. When people talk about ‘eyes on the front’ or ‘eyes on the side,’ they’re really talking about binocular vision vs monocular vision. Binocular vision is more advantageous for predators because it’s what gives you depth perception; i.e, the distance you need to leap, lunge, or swipe to take out the fast-moving thing in front of you. Any animal that can position its eyes in a way that it has overlapping fields of vision has binocular vision. That includes a lot of predatory reptiles, including komodo dragons, monitor lizards, and chameleons.

(The eyes-in-front = predator / eyes-on-sides = prey thing holds true far more regularly for birds than it does for mammals. Consider owls, hawks, and falcons vs parrots, sparrows, and doves.)

But it’s not like binocular vision is inherently “better” than monocular vision. It’s a trade-off: you get better at leap-strike-kill, but your field of vision is commensurately restricted, meaning you see less stuff. Sometimes, the evolutionary benefit of binocular vision just doesn’t outweigh the benefit of seeing the other guy coming. Very few forms of aquatic life have binocular vision unless they have eye stalks, predator or not, because if you live underwater, the threat could be coming from literally any direction, so you want as wide a field of view as you can get. If you see a predator working monocular vision, it’s a pretty safe assumption that there is something else out there dangerous enough that their survival is aided more by knowing where it is than reliably getting food inside their mouths.

For example, if you are a crocodile, there is a decent chance that a hippo will cruise up your shit and bite you in half. I’d say that makes monocular vision worthwhile.

Which brings us back to OP’s point. Why would dragon evolution favor field of view over depth perception?

A lot of the stories I’ve read painted the biggest threats to dragons (until knights with little shiny sticks came along) as other dragons. Dragons fight each other, dragons have wars. And like fish, a dragon would need to worry about another dragon coming in from any angle. That’s a major point in favor of monocular vision. Moreover, you don’t need depth perception in order to hunt if you can breathe fucking fire. A flamethrower is not a precision weapon. If you can torch everything in front of you, who cares if your prey is 5 feet away or 20? Burn it all and sift among the rubble for meat once everything stops moving.

Really, why would dragons have eyes on the front of their heads? Seems like they’ve got the right idea to me.

Worthwhile cryptozoological discourse

Holy shit

The official Sonic Twitter is a gift

apparently you can use an acorn over water in Super Mario Odyssey to jump infinitely and the community has unanimously decided to call this the Wet Nut Glitch

ohhh im so microwave safe im so fucking microwave safe please put me in the microwave

They don't seem eager for a sip of contamination smoothie!

The UK government has just unbanned fracking while everyone's distracted by the royal circus

im trying to go to sleep but i cannotttttt stop thinking about this and laughing

Listen, we have to keep this thing circulating on the internet for at least another two decades, because I have to believe that one day that little girl will be grown enough to stumble upon it and She Will Explain

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tumblr BLAST. for 5 bucks a month, whenever a blaze post of yours would be blocked by tumblr shield, it instead appears in all caps at the top of the shielded person’s dashboard for an hour and flashes violently whenever they try to block it

tumblr POSSESS. for 200$ a day you can post using another person’s blog, though you cannot change their blog in any other way nor delete their previous posts. at the end of the day they receive half of the 200 dollars

tumblr TRUE SIGHT. for 6$ monthly you can see when a blog is possessed. tumblr SCRY. for 30$ a day you can read other blogs’ private messages

tumblr POWER WORD KILL. for a one time payment of 6,666 bucks, you can delete another blog entirely. tumblr notifies all of that blog’s mutuals that you killed them. each user can only use this feature once, and thereafter loses the ability to use any of the other tumblr spells. you must have been a user for at least 10 years to use this feature

tumblr UNDENIABLE SUMMONS. for 35$ you enchant a blog such that they cannot post again until they answer your ask. alternatively, you can simply set a price point of your choosing which they will receive if they choose to answer the ask (though they are not obligated to)

tumblr ENTHRALL. for 4$ a month you can use gifs as your icon again

tumblr FAMILIAR. for 5$ a month, you summon a small, cute familiar—such as a crab, snail, owl or frog—which can carry small messages onto your mutuals’ dashboards for you. owning a familiar also protects you from being tumblr POSSESSed by anyone but your own mutuals

tumblr REFLECT. for a one time payment of 100 dollars, the next time someone attempts to use POWER WORD KILL on you, they are deleted instead. there is no way of knowing whether someone has this feature active

I’m never not gonna find it funny that the “lgb” which claims to fight for gays and lesbians and bisexual under oath admitted the group was majority made up of straight women

So bassicly it a group of straight women who can’t keep out of lgbtq+ business