ratties in the rain

a dtyis for thebeanbaguette on instagram !

here's some stuff from the horror comic I've been working on for the past couple years!! it's about a girl named Alice who has a strange reoccurring dream and finds her town the spot of a bunch of mysterious disappearances after she and her friends, Magdalena, Tansy, and Petra, find a weird sewer tunnel at the creek. it's inspired by my own reoccurring dream that I had as a child and also the sewer tunnel at the creek that me and my friends used to hang out at every day after highschool so it's very personal to me <3 I wrote the script in three months last summer and I've been posting the comic pages over on my patreon as I finish them :) I've never been this excited about a project before and I'm super excited to start talking about it!!!

coming soon this October~~~

I just wanted to let everybody know the Kissinger Death Tontine is a thing. idk when it's gonna happen, but it has to be within the next few years, right?

I tried to Blaze this and Tumblr denied it. I don't think it violates the community guidelines because I'm not advocating for anybody's death or encouraging hate because of any protected class. It's definitely tasteless and tacky, which is still very much allowed, so.

Anyways, I don't want to appeal it, so just help me spread this organically? 😘

they’re opening up a new sister store in a different province and they asked me to do some email correspondence with my joint health and safety counterpart out there to help him get set up and run the team, but they warned me before hand that he was “notoriously difficult” so i was absolutely dreading this thinking “shit, he’s gonna be one of those guys who thinks taking direction is an insult to his masculinity and he’s gonna be rude and suck”

but it turns out he’s just really autistic and needs super clear direction + he writes his emails like a 1911 telegram. i LOVE this guy. i’ve never worked with someone who wrote so clearly and in such detail, and absorbs everything i say. plus whenever he gets an email he responds immediately with “received. response to follow. thank you.” top 10 coworkers of all time. top 5 even.

Ohoho now let’s get into this shit, shall we? Time for some numbers!

Estimates actually put the death toll between 30 to 60 percent of the European population, there were so many dead and so much variation from area to area you can’t accurately estimate how many it really was

People who got infected by the “Black Death” were to 80% dead within 3 to 5 days, the population was reduced so dramatically that it took between 80 to 150 years to regrow to where it was before, varying from location to location

Some places were almost entirely depopulated. Over 60% of Norway died within two years, China’s population was reduced from around 125 million to 65 million in the late 14th century, at its peak Damascus reported around 1000 dead every day, between 75 and 200 million people died overall in a time where the world population didn’t even reach 500 million.

And let’s not even get into the persecution the Jewish had to face. No wait, let’s do that actually. “The Jews are poisoning our wells” was something people liked to say because they couldn’t think of anything else and hey, why not blame the Jewish? The Jewish communities in Mainz and Cologne were completely annihilated (not a lot of character development happening in Germany, hmm) and about 2000 more people were killed in the Strasbourg massacre. Simply because they couldn’t figure out where the disease came from and hated the Jewish enough to blame them without evidence

Fun fact, the word quarantine originated in the time of the first global outbreak. It comes from the Italian word for 40, which was the period of time people were isolated if they came from infected areas.

The world didn’t survive the Black Death, too many people died for the disease to spread effectively

And then it came back several more times, including two more major pandemics and many more outbreaks. The most deadly one in modern times was, buckle up, 2017 in Madagascar where it killed 170 people and thousands more were infected.

Now, before someone starts worrying, here’s the good news: thanks to modern medicine the fatality rate was pushed down to around 10%. I think we can all agree significantly better than before.

So next time someone says “the plague went away without vaccines”, now you have numbers. Have fun.

So basically it only stopped because it got the Plague Inc game over screen for being too lethal for the infectivity to keep up.

That’s terrifying.

We do not want another scenario like that.

How to Argue Like an Asshole

Good evening, friends, let me tell you some Secrets on how to argue like (and with) assholes. I’m writing this because I keep running into a particular asshole, and I need to stop engaging with them, and so this is an instruction sheet for myself as well as you guys. 

First, try to avoid assholes; they don’t deserve your time and energy. But, if an Argument is unavoidable, here are a few tips on how to emerge unscathed. 

Let go of the idea that you’re going to win. 

You’re not gonna win. Nobody wins in an argument with an asshole. But, on the other hand, you can make them lose. You can deprive them of their entertainment and their triumph. 

How??? 

Do not present your side of this debate. 

This is so counter-intuitive for most of us who believe in things like, oh, science, or real facts, or the idea that real facts can be determined by science. Here’s a cool terrible thing about humans: certainty has nothing to do with facts. And when people are certain, that is when they become assholes. 

When someone’s only goal is to win an argument, any real evidence or facts you give them is just ammunition for them to turn against you. 

You will not convince them. So what should you be doing? 

Destroy their arguments.

This is a thing of joy, because it’s what assholes are used to doing. They are, at heart, morons who don’t know how to construct, only how to destroy. 

I used to be super emotional about arguments like this. I couldn’t think of anything to say while the other person ranted on about their horrifying bigotry. Now I’m a lawyer, and I’ve learned to weaponize my essentially nitpicky nature. For money. 

So here are some easy tactics you can remember and deploy: 

- Make them define the words they use. Nitpick the definitions. 

- Turn questions back on them. If they ask you “why do you believe x”, ask them why they believe y. If they pull some “I asked first” shit, ask them why they’re afraid to defend their beliefs. 

- Call them emotional.  If possible, pick out specific emotions. This is especially devastating when you’re debating a man, as he will get more emotional as a result. 

- “Why is that funny? I don’t get it.” Making people explain mean jokes can be a delight; they just wilt the more you question them about the underlying assumptions. 

- Laugh at any especially dumb shit. Like they use some slogan or catchphrase that’s obviously untrue, due to science, or essentially ridiculous, like “we’ve made America great again,” and you just blurt out laughing. If they get mad, tell them – oh, so sorry, I’ll shut up, I’m giving you the floor to talk about your beliefs. I’m respecting you. This is a goddamn power move. It gives you the high ground, and also the implied control over the situation. The floor belongs to you, but you are yielding it to someone because you can. 

- If they make an awkward exit, let them. Especially if they call the discussion “political.” It means they’re feeling attacked. Graciously allow them to retreat with their tail between their legs. If they storm off, allow them to do that too. Congratulations; you’ve ended the argument and you don’t have to deal with it anymore. 

Basically: hand the asshole a shovel, and let ‘em dig. Relieve yourself of the burden to convince them they are wrong, and just sour their fun instead. 

–

Additionally, these are the tactics that assholes use, consciously or subconsciously, all the time. Recognize them. Once you know what they are, you can become immune to the intimidation and belittling tactics. 

Good luck. 

Good to know.

Oh, of all people to use that phrase for....

what if there was an alien . and it was really scary 

one of the few things nope has made me realize is that compared to most movies that have animal-loving characters being all on their snow white bullshit and say “i love all animals they all talk to me and i understand all of them” while being surrounded by dozens of birds and deers and squirrels that somehow tolerate their stuck up asses and all that shit, nope has someone who understands the wild, unpredictable nature that many creatures have in the form of OJ.

he doesn’t suck up to the “animal” (in this case, the alien) and claim to be buddy buddy with it. he doesn’t try to convince everybody around him that the “animal” can talk to him and communicate with him. he doesn’t try to make it his best friend and make it his newest show pony for everyone to come over and see and go like “wow!” at (unlike a certain unlucky mf starting with j and ending with upe).

he treats it as it is, an animal, and keeps his distance. he knows how to because of his experience with his family’s horses and because he knows the importance of treating them with respect while also regarding the fact that they are capable of anything disastrous (like the incident with lucky at the hollywood set).

OJ sure as hell isn’t snow white, but maybe that’s a good thing.

angel torres, king cringefail

Percy jackson teaser + text posts 

I just saw someone accuse a lesbian author of queerbaiting for her book series that’s chock full of canonically queer characters just because no one ever kisses or explicitly says they want to kiss anyone of the same gender in the first book, So here’s a reminder that not all queer media has to be romance, queer characters can still be good representation if they’re single, and it is literally impossible for a piece of media to queerbait with canonically queer characters.

This post is me acknowledging that some people go onto tumblr to escape the real world and to soothe themselves after stressful experiences, so if they block or ignore social justice and news stories so that their decompression isn’t interrupted with yet more stress, it is not only no one’s business but it makes perfect sense.

Never judge people for not reblogging something.

I want the megacorp that is disney to die as much as the next guy, but before it does I want it to pump so much money into percy jackson that by the sheer power of disney media domination they actually replace hp's cultural relevance with PJO in the global consciousness of important children's book series and media

Shoutout to boringcore queers. Shoutout to queers who just want to wear comfortable clothes that aren't particularly interesting or attention grabbing. Shoutout to queers who don't think about clothes as this huge canvas of exploration and just want to wear shorts and a t-shirt. So much of queer culture, especially in spaces like tumblr, puts an emphasis on clothing as Evidence And Expression Of Queerness and it has got to be so alienating to be a person who just wants to wear regular clothes constantly getting that preference associated with "the boring cishets (who are losers)". Your queerness is not stored in your wardrobe and you're still cool and interesting even if you don't want your clothes to be.

I hate that as Indigenous people, we have to slowly explain the concept of LandBack to basically every colonizer.

Like no we're not going to just throw you out, or put you in camps, or any of that shit. We just want to be able to take care of our ancestral land and be the ones in charge of protecting it.

Like I know these people were raised with a colonial mindset but after a while I just start to lose sympathy.

Like oh you're worried about having your home violently ripped out from under you?? What a fucking tragedy.

I wasn't gonna add to this, but like, no, I wanna add to this.

What will change for you, Whitey McWhiterson, if LandBack takes place?

Not a whole fucking lot.

You might be incentivized to switch to less-polluting modes of transportation, such as biking. Gas might be discouraged.

The environment might be prioritized.

You might become a citizen of, say, Mi'kma'ki instead of the USA.

Your kids might be taught an Indigenous language in schools.

History class would be a lot more up front.

But your day to day life? Very little will change. You're not gonna be kicked out if your house. You're not gonna be rounded up and put into a camp. You might be required to have the minimum basic decency towards the environment. It will be the Sovreign Peoples running the show.

But you, Joe Shmoe, will be left alone to live your life.

Which is more than we can say your people did for us.

Fuck Yes. Grew up next to the Seneca Nation and never understood why this concept was hard for people to understand except colonialism fucks up your brain so bad you can't conceptualize anything like this that DOESN'T involve literally destroying the other culture/peoples. Same way a lot of scared white people are worried black people will get violent or aggressive with them because they know how their ancestors (or, often, they themselves) have treated black people in the past and they're worried about fucking retribution.

idk who needs to hear this today, but don't go lurking on ex friends and partners. nothing you see or read will make you feel better there. all you're doing is hurting your own feelings. leave them in the past and do your best to move on with your own life, to make what you have now happier rather than dwelling on things that used to be (: