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hello folks hello folks

@cakehorse / cakehorse.tumblr.com

30s, he/him, SFF, games, Henson Company, animals, assorted ridiculousness.
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i literally think of that "polynesians first to discover antarctica, not news to maori" headline so much it's so fucking funny

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highly skilled ocean voyagers living close to antarctica who have oral history of heading south and discovering a land full of ice sheets and mountains of ice and snow were first to discover antarctica, not news to said group of people

airline customer service: hello this is SAS how can i help me: ok so i booked a flight with you just now and i’d like to reserve a space for my pet in the cargo hold, i’m bringing a cockatiel SAS: (audibly worried) uh… uhm… i’m not sure we can… transport that kind of um… pet? me: oh, huh? i did ring to check before i booked and the guy on the phone said it’d be fine? SAS: (”dealing with unhinged customers” voice) uh. ok. well, i guess i can try to check… just give me some cage dimensions. how big is its cage me: well i got him a teeny tiny travel cage, so… 50x30x30, at most SAS: centimeters?? me: yeah? is there a problem? SAS: can you tell me exactly how big is this crocodile??? me: COCKATIEL SAS: …OH

My favourite Wikipedia page of all time is definitely the one of aptronyms - aka, names that suit the person who has them. Here are some gems:

This page also contains a section of IRONIC aptronyms, AKA inaptronyms. Here's a sample

the townspeople: ah, this poor fellow! clearly he is a symbol of heroism most noble, locked in battle against the inevitable evi-

*dracula, as a dog, runs by*

the townspeople: DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG!!!!!