What am I even doing anymore?

i think dumbledore was growing weed in the forbidden forest the whole time and that’s why it was forbidden. that’s also why he acts the way he does.

i think we need to bring back calling people internet famous instead of calling them influencers like there needs to be something borderline derogatory injected back into it

suho in the exo gc: wrap up all the solo shit before september ends, i’m so fucking serious

months -> years

I truly hate the word "unalive." There are so many other euphemisms that fictional Italian mobsters worked so hard to provide you with and you just ignore them.

beautiful compilation from @orc-sign-language

"Joined the great majority" is a good one that I practically never hear.

Heard another good one in an old radio drama the other day - "He slipped out of my arms and stopped paying taxes."

Me, age 10, doing an essay on the pharoah’s curse for school: huh. So this archeologist that died and everyone thought it was because he disturbed the pharoah’s tomb actually died because he used a rusty razor to shave and it infected a mosquito bite. I can see how people could come to that conclusion, but it is a bit silly

Me, today, shaving my mosquito bite-ridden legs: I must tread carefully lest I incur the pharoah’s wrath

When I say “I love this artist” I either know 5 of their songs that I play on repeat or I know their entire discography and you just have to guess which one it is

making every conversation into being about The Character with the same reliability and conviction of a youth pastor going “you know who else partied? our lord and savior”

if god is real then how come younger siblings can grow taller than older siblings

Grounding techniques don't really work for me especially in public... "five things I can see" I see a bunch of people pissing me off

So, my sister is having surgery today, and as I’m pacing through the hallway, I find this.

what

People who call u without warning for non serious reasons are so scary like if you call me without texting me first im fully assuming you’re in a saw trap or something

"We have a new AI feature!" "With the power of AI..." "Our AI..."

I am going to abandon technology and start only inscribing things on clay tablets

*giant wind gust outside*

Me: “Don’t say it.”

My Brain:

mens thighs!!!!! in slutty shorts!!!!!!!!!!

that pose

Marc Spector in Summon the Suit [4/?] ↪Countdown to Moon Knight's return in What If...? Season 3

rip to all the “fuckyeah___” blogs that carried our society at one point </3