Bird

scooby doo mold poisoning episode

they still do the villain reveal at the end but instead of unmasking some guy they just lift up the wallpaper

The ORC DJ blocks your path

The ORC DJ plays a LOWKEY VINTAGE HOUSE SET with your VINTAGE HOUSE VINYL

The ORC DJ finds the vibe MID!

The ORC DJ delivers a PUNISHING ROUNDHOUSE

You are DEAD

girl helppp

forcefemmed future self

the replies are even worse

Scottish government currently has a bunch of ads up to get screened for lung cancer, but for some reason they’ve decided to personify cancer as some sort of gothic butch milf and I’m obsessed with her

googledocs you are getting awfully uppity for something that can’t differentiate between “its” and “it’s” correctly

oho and now you’re questioning my adverb usage? you? you?

you fucking dare?

you try to change ‘tears’ to ‘years’ for no reason but don’t catch ‘imporint’???

hey quick question gdocs

what the fuck

querched up white boy

Put your height in the tags

it fucking sucks how you can do all the therapy and self healing in the world and you still have to wake up living under a capitalist death cult that's killed community and crushes your soul

congrats you want to live and be happy

bad news the world doesn't want that for you

I'll still love fully and crawl to hope until my body gives out anyway I guess

via

Learning about edible plants (and eating them) has given me a lot of insight into the problems with the USAmerican food system

It's incredible how a supermarket gives you the sense of being surrounded by immense variety, but it's just the visual noise of advertising. In reality almost everything around you is just corn, wheat, soy, and milk, repackaged and recombined and concealed and re-flavored using additives, over and over and over again.

I'm also 10 billion times more Done with honest conversations about food having been totally obliterated by diet culture, the repugnant American emphasis on "personal choice," fatphobia, and veganism-the-ideology

The problem is not that Americans don't want to eat vegetables something something burgers obesity mcdonald's

The problem is that like 95% of the calories we PRODUCE in this country come from the same 6 or 7 crops/livestock that are easiest to minimize human labor in the production of, through automation and industrialization.

Americans eat so much ultra-processed food because it is easier for a corporation to shove a bunch of corn through 5 machines in a factory and dump additives in it, than to pay farmers and laborers for the highly skilled labor of raising a wide variety of crops and cultivars with the personal, non-mechanical, human attention that is required to grow every crop that you can't just floor with a combine harvester

Americans don't eat vegetables and fruits because vegetables and fruits in supermarkets are all of cultivars that taste like ass because they are bred to produce a lot (profitable) and be able to sit on a shelf for weeks after having the crap beat out of them being shipped in a truck. They're usually picked prematurely (so they can sit on a shelf for weeks) meaning they're unripe, mealy and sour, and half of them are approaching "actively rotting."

The main "plant based" meal that is served at almost any restaurant is a "salad" which means iceberg lettuce that looks like it was dragged across Texas by a bungee cord in a styrofoam cup of ice

We cannot make-better-choices our way out of just not having a variety of good quality food. Sure you can try to hork down the flaccid carrot sticks and strawberries that taste like pee on a tarp at a strawberry farm, but if you pretend to enjoy it everyone can see the pain in your eyes

It should be so damning of our food system that so many people legit think sugar is basically cocaine and that having access to candy and ice cream desensitizes your taste buds because they're being overwhelmed with an "unnatural" stimulus.

Buddy. You just...rarely have access to fruit that's actually fresh and ripe. Strawberries and apples aren't "sweet" in your head because the ones you've been eating usually taste like aquarium gravel.

That's so sad.

I'm just saying that one time I was lucky enough to eat ripe pawpaws in the woods still haunts me and I'm craving them just thinking about it

And sometimes you are lucky to pick up a perfectly ripe fruit from the walmart and those fruits are the fruits that live in your longing fantasies forever.

I literally still think about this one pineapple that I ate like 4 years ago I'm not even joking

We had a tangerine tree in our backyard growing up (and a few other flavors, but this story is tangerine specific). I've never tasted better tasting fruit in my life! I'd go out there when they were ripe and eat tangerines like I was afraid of catching scurvy. I already knew back then that store fruit was picked unripe, I knew even as a teenager that I was spoiled forever on tangerines. Half the peel stayed on the tree when I plucked them, the juice ran down my cheeks when I bit into the slices, I loved that tangerine tree.

A friend brought a bag of store bought tangerines to school and was sharing them around, swore up and down they were the sweetest tangerines he'd ever tasted, that he'd lucked out and found a bag that was actually ripe. I tried one slice and immediately spit it out, shaking my head, it was sooooo sour. Everyone else didn't understand, they thought I was crazy, they were the sweetest tangerines they'd ever had.

So yeah, the fruit you ate from the store you thought was ripe? That you long for? That you crave to have again years later? Probably still not as ripe as picking it fresh from the tree. Store bought strawberries, no matter how in season they are, are never as good as the ones we bought off the side of the road next to strawberry farms. Growing up in California spoiled me.

I believe it.

I ate fresh wild pawpaws in the middle of the woods last year and it literally changed me forever as a person

Okay I do not give a shit about this article at all but where did they get this picture of the skeleton wearing prescription pill armor

Like this is the coolest fucking thing I have seen in a while who made this

is he also in front of the white house?

He's the president

wait ok mutuals what do you guys call your parents???????

anddd…. SCENE! thank you to everyone who participated

Here’s a photo of the band evanescence playing donkey konga in 2004.

so that was the secret to their beautiful music…

And they’re not alone

olympics pictograms come to life | tokyo 2020 opening ceremony

+ pictogram-san at the post-ceremony presser 🥺

i think that if squirrels had the capacity to use and understand language they would constantly be saying shit like "I'm such a nutpilled stumpcel" and so on

how do i delete someone elses post

u have to gather seven sacred objects of power and shit. it's a whole quest. sorry

I get how the whole "listening to music as a dick-measuring contest for who can listen to the most obscure band" thing can get grating sometimes but I don't think people realize just how vital that phenomenon is for new up and coming bands to get a foot in the door. it's understandable to be annoyed by hipsterism but unless you want all music to be industry plants and former child stars you're just going to have to accept it as part of the social ecosystem.

most of your friends probably won't go around hyping up your amateurish self-released bandcamp project, but you know who will? the most insufferable hipster jackass you'll ever meet.

[your best friend playing your music in front of someone else]: yeah haha this is my friend's band... i know it's kinda weird and rough around the edges but i'm kinda into it... if you're not tho i'll turn it off.

[pretentious music guy you've never met before playing your music in front of someone else]: yeah so i found this on bandcamp and it completely blew me away, no one is making music like this today, it's so raw and experimental and interesting, i can't believe they only have 3 listeners on spotify, they're brilliant, frankly if you don't like this music you should kill yourself,

Writing fanfic as a non-US citizen like

In case anyone actually wants to know the answer: it’s the plot of Cars. The difference is literally the plot of Cars.

Highways are usually two-to-four (at the widest) lane roads that meander the US landscape. Think Route 66, dinosaur statues, mom-and-pop diners, southern gothic. There are state-level and national-level highways. Some run for a 100 miles, some, like US HWY-17, run most of the East Coast:

That red line is US HWY 17. If you follow it, you will go through tiny towns. You may hit stoplights. I kid you not, you will see spinning cows on poles. Businesses exist along highways that you are encouraged to pull over and visit. They were designed to let you see America.

Yeah.

Now, interstates were made in the 50s and were made to get people from Point A to Point B. These suckers range from four lanes to eight lanes around big cities. They cut through everything. If you want to get to a business, you have to take an exit ramp and detour. They are great for getting places fast. You can still have weird experiences on them, but usually at night, when your eyes start playing tricks on you. Or there are deer.

I-95 is a massive corridor that runs from the Florida Keys to the Canadian Border. You can see the difference just looking at the maps.

As far as writing goes:

If you want quirky character development inside the car, you’re looking for an interstate. The majority of Americans take interstates to go on road trips.

If you want mysterious and/or supernatural hijinks, you’re looking for a highway. They are weird, weird places, and they’re surprisingly easy to wind up on if you leave the interstate.

(Even in America, no one’s really sure what a freeway is. Just ignore it.)

Freeways exist in big cities where cars are more prominent than public transport, such as LA or Atlanta. You’ve year of liminal spaces? Freeways during rush hour are a physical manifestation of hell.

Awesome! Now what the hell is a turnpike?

If you find out, let me know. Maybe ask someone from New Jersey.

A turnpike is a highway with a toll. Turnpikes are special highways where you drive really fast and it’s usually linking big cities with each other and you keep going until you hit a toll booth.

They’re called “turnpikes” because in the olden days, there were pikes or barriers up and you had to pay the toll for them to be raised or turned to let you in.

Also, just for the record, Hawaii does have interstates.

For everyone who didn’t want to know, expressways are a form of highway that connect both suburban areas and major interstates to a city They often have both an alphanumerical name and a colloquial name In Philly we have the Schuylkill Expressway (I-76)

Would like to add that highways and mainly interstates were made specifically so THE MILITARY could get from Point A to Point B. This combined with a post-WWII boost in the economy and car industry gave Americans the ability to tour the country on their own for the first time ever. A whole chunk of American culture was created by just expanding the road system.

Think about road systems and other systems of travel when worldbuilding!

All this being said, most East Coast US people will refer to all of these things interchangeably as “highways”/”the highway.”

Another note for non-USians trying to write a road trip story – if your characters would definitely be taking the interstate, but you want them on a highway in order for the supernatural shenanigans to start (or whatever), the solution is very simple: they hit a traffic jam. Could be due to construction, could be due to an accident, but traffic slows to a crawl and they say “there’s gotta be a way around this” and take the next exit. Then it turns out their cell phone has no coverage in that spot so they can’t just pull up a map, and VOILA. Into the Twilight Zone! One of the things about an interstate is that USUALLY, there’s an exit and an entrance right by each other, so you can exit, find a gas station or a place to grab lunch near the exit, then get right back on, but this is not always the case. Sometimes there’s an exit, but nowhere nearby to get back on.

I just want to add that there’s a slightly different vibe if you’re in the midwest. Because cities on the coasts are closer together, the interstate is just a super efficient point A to point B, city to city, no interruptions.

In the midwest, and I expect the southwest, to the interstate can get some real wonky vibes because YOU ARE ALONE. You are on one black strip of neverending road across hours and hours and hours of alone. You can drive very fast for a very long time and not see signs of another human being. Sometimes the alone-ness is added to by the sheer flatness of the land around you. You can see for forever and there’s nobody here. You sometimes see dead gas stations or billboards with only scraps of paper left on them.

You are in tornado ally and there is NOWHERE to hide if a blizzard or thunderstorm or twister comes for you. If it’s winter the snow is BLINDING.

It’s beautiful. But it’s horror is less small-town-gothic and more existential threat.

For clarity: the term freeway literally means it’s an interstate with no tolls. It’s free for every driver to use.

The West Coast of the US doesn’t have tolls on our interstates, but some of our big important bridges have tolls.

Seconding @leebrontide’s bit about interstates in the mid and southwest. I have Seen Things doing cross-country moves through the southwest and midwest. One experience that we refer to as “Silent Kansas” we literally went across the entire width of Kansas without seeing a single other vehicle, open gas station, or sign of life, while shrouded in a blanket-thick fog that dissipated essentially immediately upon crossing the border into Colorado. Or the time we were driving south on the I-17 in Arizona after midnight, and there was something following us for a full hour that was a pair of glowing lights that looked like headlights but, I swear it’s fucking true, was not another car. they disappeared in my rearview on a stretch with no exits just outside the Phoenix city limits, and to this day I have no idea wtf it was.

weird shit happens on interstates away from the coasts.

Highway: a high-speed and long-distance road, but without limited access. You will have occasional stop lights or stop signs, and you’ll go through small towns. Most likely place to see a cryptid. (also a generic term for all of these roads)

Expressway: a high speed road with limited access. There are no stop signs or lights. There are entrance and exit ramps. These usually cut through the landscape to a greater degree than highways.

Freeway: an expressway without tolls

Turnpike: an expressway with tolls. So called because they had a long stick (a pike) on a pivot that blocks the road until it is turned to let you through after paying the toll.

Interstate: a (usually particularly long) expressway built as part of the interstate system. Has a designation I-## (eg, I-95). There are also local expressways that are part of the interstate system that get a third digit (I-495). These generally connect Something™ to the larger two-digit interstate (so I-495 connects to I-95). 3-digit interstates are most often freeways. A two-digit interstate may be a freeway or a turnpike and will probably switch back and forth over its length.

Also, everyone will use most of these terms wrong most of the time! You can call any of them a highway and no one will bat an eye. You could call a turnpike a freeway and people will literally not notice. If you call anything an expressway you’ll sound like a nerd or a politician. We usually only say interstate to differentiate it from some other similar road. But if you call something a turnpike that doesn’t have turnpike in its name, even if it is a toll road, people will look at you funny.

Additionally, sometimes “turnpikes” are called “tollways.” Like the Tristate around Chicago.

Really love that these explanations, while they technically explain everything, have even left me, a born American, more lost than before. Rip in pieces, non-American writers, we did our best.

All that stuff about driving through the Midwest is entirely true, FYI. Shit’s haunted out there.

Oh, and Interstates are numbered. Odd numbers are primarily north-south roads, and they start numbering in the west and move east (so “Highway 5” is in California, and I-95 is on the East Coast.) East-west roads are even numbers, and numbered south to north… I-10 runs from LA to Jacksonville, Florida, and I-90 run from Seattle to Boston. Smaller, local, parts of the Interstate will have three digit numbers… 610 is part of I-10 that goes around Houston, while I-10 itself barrels through the middle of town.

While it does not seem to be nationwide (at least, my Bostonian first wife did not know it), exits are numbered by the number of miles from the border… if you’re heading east or north, the numbers get bigger. South or west and they get smaller.

But I want to reiterate the above… if you’re in the Great Plains, from Texas up to Nebraska, at least (I haven’t roadtripped further up), you have fucking SPACE. You might stop somewhere, and the emptiness is beautiful in a way, but you cannot photograph it because the beauty is in the vastness, which disappears when you put it in the frame of a photo.

i’m a FAGGOT and a WHORE

I sell BAGUETTES at the STORE

everybody wants to rule the world

This captures everything I love about being online

This reminds me of the time that I asked if anyone had resources on the history of Shinto and while nobody had book recs, turns out an actual Temple Maiden followed me on Tumblr and was down to chat.