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Random Acts of Ruthness

@beingruth-blog

No personas, no representations, just me.

2017: the year we become ungovernable

Kali Akuno, an organizer with Cooperation Jackson and the Malcolm X Grassroots Movement talks to Alternet about the first stirrings of the mass-scale civil disobedience we must practice to resist trumpism.

I find great inspiration in Akuno’s ideas, and find them an excellent counterpoint to the idea of “not normalizing” Trump. The reality is that we always normalize everything – read the accounts of survivors of the Nazi concentration camps or Americans tortured for years in the country’s solitary confinement wings and you’ll find that, to a one, their terrible situations become normal. All constant stimulus fades to a background refrigerator hum that we can only notice when it ceases.

But Akuno is talking about normalizing resistance, becoming habitual monkeywrenchers and refuseniks, people whose first response to any trumpist outrage is “no way,” and whose fallback position is “hell no.”

My great aunt Lisa was an engineering foreman in Leningrad during the Soviet era, bossing a crew of surly, drunk, ungovernable men. Her stories about how these men featherbedded, foot-dragged, monkeywrenched and twiddled their days away were always told with a mixture of frustration (at the way they made her life difficult) and admiration (at how good they were at it).

From the Department of Energy bureaucrats who refused to turn over the names of workers who believe in climate change to the California lawmakers pledging to use state apparatus to replace anything Trump removes (up to and including climate-observing satellites), the next four years will require all of us, at every level to do our bit to make trumpism stumble and to nurture the spark of hope for a better world.

As John Scalzi wrote yesterday: “You are more important than you know, if you don’t give in to despair, to complacency, or to apathy. Add to the moral weight that bends the arc toward justice. You can’t do it alone, but without you the work becomes that much harder.”

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merindab

I used to really worry that medications would harm my creativity and it’s part of why I resisted taking them. It hasn’t. If anything it’s allowed me to be more focused and able to complete things. My imagination hasn’t changed just because I’m on anti-depressants.

a lot of my family didnt want me to start medications because they thought it would impact my ability to create, and I believed them. Now im getting better and better with my art because i dont have to fight through the brainfog or the constant panic attacks and can dedicate my energy to my work. Antidepressents didnt take my emotions away, they made them easier to handle.

also Van Gogh was literally in an asylum receiving mental health treatment when he painted ‘Starry Night’. It was one of the most stable & productive periods of his life, despite the fact that wasn’t hugely effective treatment, because they didn’t really have modern understandings of what things work on mental illness. Like, you know. Medication.

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hirakumblr

This is why we don’t romanticize mental illness or chronic disease.

ALSO because I am reading a book of his letters right now, Van Gogh himself addressed the idea that the best art came from pain and said that his art tended to suffer when his depression was hitting pretty hard. So don’t even pull that shit where you give his untreated depression credit for his art. Van Gogh would have hated that, and if antidepressants/better treatment of mental illness HAD existed then we might have even more of his work now.

I have been actually creating things now that I am medicated, whereas before I had ideas but I couldn’t make them materialize.

What people tend to gloss over is that creativity and art are not only inspiration, but also WORK. Lots of work. Refining a technique and developing an idea and editing until it’s actually good, that takes patience and focus and dedication. Yeah, mental illness may give you weird crazy ideas, but it also stops you from making them reality. 

People say that art can be made with mental illnesses but they always forget that art is WORK, real work, hard work, constant work. 

Yeah, real and current talk about depression/anxiety/productivity. I had three 15,000 word-20,000 word fiction pieces due 10/31, 11/30, 12/31. 10/21 someone who was like a dad to me died. So I took 2 days off but I’d done so much already I squeaked in at 10/31. ...11/9, well we all know what happened. I couldn’t feel and I couldn’t write for a week. I lost the thread of everything.

I pulled back together and eventually got that done 12/15, although 12/5 we got another piece of rough news about my husband’s job. I’m working, every day, to get this last piece finished... but my new 1/15 deadline is looking shaky because of the complete exhaustion I’ve felt since the election on top of my husband’s increased depression and being a good partner to him and just doing my own self-care and trying to find joy so I don’t burn out in a beautiful flame and can actually do edits next. Mental health strain slowed my work to a crawl. Also creating from a place of pain is WAY less fun than creating in October, when my medication was meeting my basic needs, was. Medicate your artists, not to make them uncreative zombies, but to make them human beings who can function as humans first and then make the art that fulfills them and that they want to make. 

when i find myself in times of trouble

terry pratchett comes to me

whispering sam vimes once arrested a motherfucking dragon

you are capable of literally anything

Sam Vimes once arrested two opposing armies to end a war.

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pasiphile

Sam Vimes fought an ancient mind-controlling spirit and won. Sam Vimes killed a werewolf with his bare hands. Sam Vimes happily wears the awful lumpy itchy socks his wife knits him. Sam Vimes causes traffic jams in order to be home in time to read his baby a bedtime story. Sam Vimes fought at the barricades— twice. Sam Vimes waited until his interviewee had left and then put his coat over his head so no one could hear him laughing hysterically at her silly name. Sam Vimes is my hero.

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witchylana

Sam Vimes overcame a crippling alcohol dependency. Sam Vimes examines and confronts his internal prejudices. Sam Vimes lived in poverty because he was giving his salary to the widows and orphans of fellow officers. Sam Vimes cleaned up a corrupt police force and made it inclusive of the different ethnicities in his city.

Sam Vimes is my hero too.

He turned to leave, then seemed to have a thought. “Sergeant Dorfl!” he said, turning back. “D’you think you’ll believe in gods now?”

Every eye in the Watch House turned to the golem sergeant. “Not Gods, Yet.” said Sergeant Dorfl. “But Always Sam Vimes.”

do it for the vimes

Sam Vimes once violated his country’s foreign policy to help a group of frightened women, who then launched a cultural revolution.

I wish Sam Vimes were real so I could hug that man.

I have so fucking many Sam Vimes feels it is fucking ridiculous.

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shaddy24

One time Sam Vimes went on a vacation. While away, the entire Watch except for Corporal Colon went on strike, leaving no law enforcement of any kind for a period of time. The entire criminal population of Ank Morpork decided to take a break from crime, because they knew that if anything disastrous happened while he was away, Sam Vimes would be very, very irritated with whoever was responsible. And none of them dared to be responsible.

Petition to replace all the terrible Chuck Norris memes that should’ve died a decade ago with Sam Vimes memes.

Another woman utterly failed by our society’s devaluation of women’s reproductive health. We can’t wait around for male doctors to decide what we need to know. This is why we need to take control and educate ourselves about our own bodies.

and here’s some comments i saw under the post. why is this a pattern?? why is this a recurring theme?? why is this information not common knowledge? what the fuck are doctors doing??

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sora2522

This is news to me so let’s share it so people will know!

Gross tmi: but i passed a pretty big clot after having my daughter. It was about the size of a baseball. It actually hurt worse because while 15 hours of labor opened my cervix, i passed the clot in 30 minutes. I knew it was a possibility because of my midwife and reading, but everyone Ive told after this (mostly other pregnant women) were shocked that this could happen.

In our culture, it’s much more common to do deep research about what family cars we want to buy than we do about childbirth when we ’re pregnant.

Tmi: I passed a huge clot after birth in the bathroom of my hospital room and called the nurse sobbing because I didn’t know it was normal. She treated me like an idiot, but NO ONE told me it was a possibility. And the pain associated with healing for the first couple of weeks after birth was worse than the labor imo. Again, I had no idea. They didn’t tell me a thing besides “sitz bath regularly and change your pads.” Before discharging me from the hospital.

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evashandor

I was most definitely told about this in school. Fucking hell, 4-6 weeks of bleeding? My periods were/are bad enough, why the hell don’t we get told this?

I didn’t know it could last so long, wtf? Is the bleeding inevitable after birth? 

Bleeding is inevitable after birth - your uterine wall is shedding a fuck ton of lining. It can last from three to six weeks (possible longer) and it tapers off.

More TMI - I passed a MASSIVE clot after my fourth birth. At this point I already knew this could happen - it’s normal. What I DIDN’T know, was that I had caused it.

My post birth contractions were so bad after the birth that it felt like full transition labor. And they don’t give you anything for the pain. So I used a hot water bottle, without the nurses knowing, and it caused me to bleed even more. I lost so much blood that by the first time they sat me up to go to the bathroom, I fainted. It took three more tries until I could sit up.

Anyway, that’s not the point. The point is, the next morning I passed a clot the SIZE OF ANOTHER PLACENTA I KID YOU NOT, and I know what is and is not normal. So I called for the nurse and through the door told her I had passed a huge clot, and her response was - “It’s not big. I know what big is.” She hadn’t even looked. So I rolled my eyes and said, “Yeah, no. It’s big, I’m telling you.”

So, sounding extremely put upon, she asked me to open the door. I did, and after a long pause she goes, “Okay, yeah, that’s a little big.”

YOU DON’T SAY.

The point I’m trying to get across is that this shit is so common - women not knowing this stuff is so expected, and it keeps getting reinforced. People don’t expect you to know anything, don’t teach you anything, and then make you feel like you’re totally ignorant and a burden for your lack of knowledge when THEY WON’T SHARE.

Fucking learn EVERYTHING you can when it comes to childbirth, girls. It is the single most empowering thing you can do for yourself. And if you missed something, that’s okay. But the more knowledge you arm yourself with, the more in control of your situation you’ll be.

A few post partum tips:

  • DON’T use a hot water bottle - lol.
  • ONLY pads - NO tampons. Tampons can cause severe infection, not to mention, you probably don’t want to be shoving anything up there any time soon.
  • If you’ve had stitches, sitz baths DO help relieve the pain. Another great pain reliever? Dampen some pads and freeze them. Let one thaw slightly and use it on top of another pad. This will help with the pain as well as reduce swelling. Change the pad out as soon as it’s thawed completely. This REALLY helps on the first couple days after giving birth.
  • If you pass a clot, don’t sweat it. Even the one I passed, which was fucking massive, just required that we keep an eye out to make sure it didn’t happen again. If it does, talk to your doctor.
  • Take a pain killer half an hour before nursing. Because YES - your uterus is contracting after you give birth, to get back to its original size, and nursing causes much stronger contractions. Taking nursing-safe painkillers won’t prevent the pain, but it will reduce it. 
  • Buy disposable underwear for the first few days after birth. They will get VERY dirty. Or use your ratty old pairs that you’re ready to get rid of. Double up on pads - line them all the way up your ass-crack. I am so serious. And wear dark pants.
  • Pee in the shower. You do NOT want to wipe down there right after birth because ow. Peeing in the shower lets you just rinse afterwards. Especially if you’ve had stitches, peeing in the shower, with the shower-head rinsing AS you go, keeps stinging to a minimum. And fuck everyone else - keep on peeing in the shower until you feel ready to move back to toilet paper. Middle of the night and need to pee? Get your pants off - get in the shower and just go.

This is just a few things, but PLEASE feel free to send me an ask if you have any questions about ANYTHING childbirth/pregnancy/nursing related. I have four incredible kids. I’ve done it all - c-section, vacuume birth, episiotimy, stitches, with an epidural, without an epidural. I’m here.

….I know I keep reblogging this but people keep adding super important information.

I feel like no one tells women this stuff because if a woman was even a little on the fence about having a baby before this would kinda make them run for the damn hills.

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kaxen

…..you are correct, typing.

300% EXTRA SURE I’M NOT HAVING BABIES. 

peri bottles, witch hazel or anti-pain anticeptic spray are your friends. Also passing large clots after birth is a WARNING SIGN. Bigger than a half dollar is a sign that you have not passed your entire placenta (this is most common in hospital vaginal births where the mother is not allowed to naturally birth the placenta and instead has it ripped out by the doctor) if there is any placenta left in your uterus you can get extremely ill. This happened to both myself and my mother in law

WOW I didn’t know any of this and I’m terrified of what more I’m unaware of about my own body :( Honestly when will we fucking abolish this taboo about the female body…

I had pretty great sex ed in school (lots of contraceptive information, and totally acknowledged that teenagers might have sex) and all of this is news to me.

And, as a 28-year-old person with a uterus, I’m extremely appalled I’m just learning this.

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deanplease

Long, but very important information, even for those who don’t plan to have children, because you will almost certainly know someone who will, and you might be able to to help them. Or at least increase your level of empathy for them.

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brandx

…HOLY HELL. REBLOG TO SAVE A LIFE, SERIOUSLY.

people loooove to make out like pregnancy and childbirth are this beautiful thing that a woman’s body is made to do, and leave out all this incredibly important and scary info.

the healthcare system fails women in so so many ways, especially around sexual and reproductive health, and it needs to stop.

PSA for those folks who have had or will have babby soon.

Reblogging because fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck the state of education re: reproduction and childbirth in this country/the world/etc. 

Emancipated duels. Photo by Pavel Kurmilev

Baroness Lubinska who presided over the famous duel between Princess Pauline Metternich and the Countess Kielmannsegg in 1892, insisted that the duelists remove their clothing above their waists to avoid infection in the event that a sword pushed clothing into the wound it caused. Being a doctor, the baroness had seen many instances of septic infection in soldiers for this very reason throughout her years of medical training.

“The cause of the duel is reputed to be an argument over arrangements for the Vienna Musical and Theatrical Exhibition.” - I like these ladies.

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m-azing

I arrive at the duel 

sword: sharpened

sepsis: prevented

tits: out

I AM FORCIBLY EJECTED FROM THE VIENNA MUSICAL AND THEATRICAL EXHIBITION

How to call your reps when you have social anxiety

When you struggle with your mental health on a daily basis, it can be hard to take action on the things that matter most to you. The mental barriers anxiety creates often appear insurmountable. But sometimes, when you really need to, you can break those barriers down. This week, with encouragement from some great people on the internet, I pushed against my anxiety and made some calls to members of our government. Here’s a comic about how you can do that, too. (Resources and transcript below.)

Motivational resources: There are a lot! Here are a few I really like:

  • Emily Ellsworth explains why calling is the most effective way to reach your congressperson.
  • Sharon Wong posted a great series of tweets that helped me manage my phone anxiety and make some calls.
  • Kelsey is tweeting pretty much daily with advice and reminders about calling representatives. I found this tweet an especially great reminder that calls aren’t nearly as big a deal as anxiety makes them out to be.

Informational resources: There are a lot of these, as well! These three are good places to start:

i really appreciate low maintenance friendships like those friends that you can go months at a time without seeing or talking to but when you do meet up its like totally normal because you both recognize that you both have busy schedules and you both have your own thing going on but there’s still that bond that holds you together

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arvensis5

These aren’t low maintenance friends. These are your lifelong friends who like you for who you are, not what you bring to them.

Yes and yes and once again yes.

Bae: Tell me something sexy in Spanish
Me: Agua. Tierra. Fuego. Aire. Hace mucho tiempo, las cuatro naciones vivían juntas en armonía. Entonces, todo cambió cuando la Nación del Fuego atacó. Solo el Avatar, maestro de los cuatro elementos, podría detenerlos, pero cuando el mundo mas lo necesitaba, se desvaneció. Cien años pasaron y mi hermano y yo descubrimos el nuevo Avatar, un maestro aire llamado Aang. Y aunque sus habilidades para controlar el aire eran grandiosas, tenia mucho que aprender antes de estar listo para salvar al mundo pero yo creo que Aang podra salvarlo.