(goes to the palisades) (suddenly remembers im gay) oh god the fucking wasp
*girl desperately trying to scrub a stain of blood off the key to her husband's forbidden room voice* of course he had to have blue hair and pronouns
A bunch of worms rolling down a hill one after the other (horizontally)
Somehow they figured out its faster than crawling underground. Smart worms.
mrfunksandwich
can they roll vertically? curl themselves up into a wheel and just go?
what you are describing is against god’s design
oh so when a bunch of roman senators kill their leader it's #girlboss but when i, macbeth,
I think it's very fascinating that a lot of medieval gender was directly tied to your position in the bedroom and whether or not you were filling your respective gender roles - so much so that one could argue being a virgin was an entirely different gender identity. There was a lot of anxiety surrounding sexual encounters that could be construed as "deviant" regardless of hetero or homoeroticism.
I find this even more fascinating when it comes to negotiating Gawain's gender in SGGK.
—Vulgate Cycle, Lancelot II, 52. The End of Galehaut’s War with Arthur; the Meeting of Lancelot and Guenevere
This is a perfect example!! I don't have my book with me right now but in SGGK, he is consistently taking the physically lower position in his interactions with Lord and Lady Bertalik - the Lady tends to be on top of him in bed while they talk to each other while Gawain has to physically reach up to Bertilak to kiss him each day. All the while being interrogated about an identity he finds himself struggling to keep up with and situated in a liminal castle that sits on a border territory. The gender of it all!!
me thinking about shakespeare normally: mercutio was gay
me thinking about shakespeare at 3 am: romeo and juliet is underrated as a story. why? because everyone treats it as a love story when they should be treating it as a commentary on how children are too afraid to come to their parents with a problem or even voice their opinions on things without fear of facing repercussions. juliet didn’t want to marry paris, some old guy she didn’t know. so OF COURSE she was going to choose romeo, some hot young thing that talked nice and looked nicer and probably made her feel special. she had had at least a conversation with the guy. but no. she can’t tell her father that she doesn’t want to marry and would rather try to get to know that nice montague boy that was chatting her up while crashing her party. but of course she can’t. both of because societal expectations and because of the whole blood feud. and then there’s romeo. we all call him an emo fuck but the fact remains that it is highly hinted that he had depression and while finding someone “to love” doesn’t automatically fix that in a person, him “loving” juliet definitely did seem to improve his mood while his parents just brushed him off. and in the end of the story, they’d both rather kill themselves then tell their parents that they’re going to be disappointing them by telling them who they “love” and that’s just fucked up. these were teenagers. and while this may have not been old billy shakes’ original message, it stands that this interpretation could benefit being taught to a lot of students and even some parents.
me thinking about shakespeare at 3:30 am: also know what was fucked up? mercutio and tybalt died without even knowing what they were dying for. they literally say in the beginning of the play that no one remembers why the blood feud started. and mercutio wasn’t even an capulet or montague. this wasn’t his fight. but he died anyways, under romeo’s arm, by tybalt’s hand. sure, they were fighting because tybalt was pissed about romeo seeing juliet and shit, but mercutio didn’t know that. he thought tybalt was just starting shit just to start shit. he didn’t know what he was dying for. “a plague on both your houses” indeed. and then tybalt. fucking firey tybalt. like i said before, no one knows why the blood feud started. he essentially just died because his family hates another guy’s family probably over something like the 13th century equivalent of a sports rivalry. that’s so fucked up. while i don’t remember what their exact ages were, i’m pretty sure they were teenagers too. what the fuck.
me thinking about shakespeare at 3:35 am: and then benevolio. oh god benevolio. what even happened to him??? first, he watches this guy who was always a jackass to him but he’s probably known all his life get killed, then his (boy)friend dies all because of something his cousin does, and then his cousin is exiled/flees before he’s exiled. he’s then all alone for like the rest of the play, until he assuredly walks into the mausoleum at the end of the play and sees his cousin dead on the ground with some girl he’s maybe seen twice in his life dead on top of him. what the fuck. what the actual fuck. poor benevolio just lost his two best friends and now he’s all alone. and you know they never even say if he’s in the play for the rest of the thing. you just assume he is. for all we know he could’ve skipped town, or killed himself as well, or died in a duel, or anything. i always headcanoned him as the youngest of the group. and like, that just makes it worse. poor benevolio, the guy that was left all alone at the end of the play with all his friends and acquaintances dead. “for never was a story of more woe / than that of juliet and her romeo”???? bullshit. for never was a story of more woe than that of our poor fucking benevolio.
doriangrey
me thinking about shakespeare at 3:50 am: mercutio was gay
hey sorry your boyfriend was mistaken for the king and stabbed through the curtains. yeah he was wrapped in cloth and left to rot. he’s at supper now. no, he’s not eating. the worms are feasting on him now. oh and - yeah the prince just called him a dumb bitch. sorry.
“Fate,“ Blue replied, glowering at her mother, “is a very weighty word to throw around before breakfast.” ― Maggie Stiefvater, The Raven Boys
she franken on my stein til i 'hateful day when I received life!' I exclaimed in agony. 'Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust? God, in pity, made man beautiful and alluring, after his own image; but my form is a filthy type of yours, more horrid even from the very resemlance. Satan had his companions, fellow-devils, to admire and encourage him; but I am solitary and abhorred.'
My cat has to wear a cone this week and it made me think of an angel whose halo is a cone.
Local idiot is cone-free and back on his regular sillyzone nonsense.
I am obsessed with the theological implications of this
um i went to night we met island and there was all and then most of you some and now none of you
I’ve been told I should post the collage I made of fanfic authors bullying Jon Sims lmao
[ID: A collage of screenshots from AO3. Each except is on its own line. They are from the text of a fic unless specified otherwise. They read as follows:
Jon is very good at repressing things that make him feel things,
Realizing that, in addition to being profoundly unobservant, he was also profoundly stupid.
It’s for his own good, and it makes him feel… itchy.
(Note: this was a normal progression of events traditionally known as becoming friends.)
He should do that. He will do that. He absolutely doesn’t.
“That’s a lie.” “It’s not,” Jon lies.
Jon isn’t boring. He might dress like someone who inherited their entire wardrobe from their grandparents, and he might look like he’s constantly on the verge of passing out from exhaustion, and he might laugh like he’s only heard about laughing as a concept but has never actually tried it himself, but he doesn’t seem
(Tag) Jon has the emotional intelligence of an amoeba,
instead he says, “I’m making tea. If you want some, that is.” Martin doesn’t immediately reply, which makes Jon go through a whole array of emotions between Of course he doesn’t want tea over Why would anyone ever want tea from you right to No one is ever going to love you and you’re going to die alone. Then Martin says, “I’d love a cuppa, thanks.” Jon thinks, Right.
(Tag) love is stored in the Jon but it must battle for dominance with the stupid,
(Fic summary) the mortifying ordeal of being forgotten in a tesco car park, by vennix, The Magnus Archives (Podcast). Jon gets left in a tesco car park. That’s it.
Jon would have resented the implication that he looked like the sort of person who would let a cat make off with his lunch if not for the fact that he absolutely was that sort of person. He considered resenting it anyway, just on principle.
And he couldn’t seem to get along with any of them, for reasons which were… varying degrees of his own fault.
Not even Jon, whom Martin had once seen mention offhand that he had an orange and then eat an entire lemon without noticing his mistake, was that oblivious.
Carol texted him a link. Before he could respond, Jon burst out of his office, looking like the God of Drama had pulled his very soul from his body and committed it to tape, leaving him a hollow husk of a man. That, or maybe he just needed a nap.
God, Jon was almost expressing genuine human emotion.
“Um, can I help you with anything?” Martin asked, the kindest smile back on his face. And Jon yearned. For what? To punch him? To wipe that goddamn smile of his face?
“Jon wouldn’t know a feeling if it hit him with a brick,” Tim said, and Sasha nodded. Jon looked back at him. “Are you making fun of me?” Martin blinked. “Um. No?” He was praising him. Quite shamelessly, in fact.
Jon isn’t…great, with displays of emotion. It usually makes him feel sort of itchy.
Jon is well aware that he’s kind of allergic to being a person.
They were having a cup of tea, their second of the evening, and they were just talking. Like regular people who like each other’s company. Jon was pretty sure there was a term for that.
Maybe he has a type, and Jon is just the latest in a long line of ‘men who look like they avoid sleep for a living’.“
Jon can almost hear the “I told you so” chorus from everyone who has ever warned him to think before he speaks.
They go through self-checkout and begin to make their way back towards the Institute. Jon sneaks a glance at the shopping bags. There is a comb sticking out of the top. “What’s that for?” he says, pointing at it. “Er… your hair?” Martin gives him a sidelong look. “Let’s be honest, it does need it.” Jon tries to say thank you. What comes out instead is, “I don’t… use combs.” “I really, really believe that,” says Martin. Jon decides that this is the last time he will try to do anything nice for another person.
Jon had never claimed he wasn’t stupid.
(Tag) jon’s lack of self-care is its own character,
Jon has seen him raise his voice exactly three times, and each of these was related to minor things such as Jon fainting from low blood pressure, Jon fainting from blood loss after being kidnapped again, and Jon not drinking the tea Martin made for fear of poison.
Martin stares at him. This in itself isn’t that weird. Martin frequently stares at him, usually either after being given what Jon calls Clear Orders and what Jon has once overheard Martin refer to as Incomprehensible and Unreasonable Requests, or, alternatively, when John microwaves tea.
busy at the moment, try next year if i’m still alive.
- Don’t go and sabotage this just because you felt an emotion.“
/end ID]
edit: anyone who’s looking for fic through the excerpts here should avoid the fic with the amoeba tag (titled “Temporary Reprieve” on AO3), as it has Georgie call Jon the r-slur
don’t joke about “horny jail” it’s actually a very serious topic and it happened to hannibal lecter
came back from death wrong trope? you can easily avoid this by just never dying at all (stays alive wrong stays alive wrong stays alive wrong stays alive wr)
King Hamlet: Brief let me be
Me: come on man
i went to Hate You Specifically island and there was the whole supernatural cast & crew there and i think they were filming an episode