The other day I was with a new friend and I casually mentioned I preferred He/Him pronouns but didn't mind others and they said "love it when Im right" and I was like "what?" And they said "genderqueer vibes" and I was so happy I busted out a dumb lil dance, forever ruining whatever street cred I may have otherwise had.
Love to see folks picking up what you're putting out
Saying this here because it's important:
When Queer people have to start going back into the closet, you all are going to need to stop accusing random people of shit just because they wrote a queer story or drew two same sex people kissing but don't "look" or "act" queer enough for your own liking.
You aren't owed any insight to people's personal lives let alone their personal relationship with gender or their sexuality and when you question people about shit like that you are risking putting these people in dangerous situations.
You can get people killed. You can get people outed and ostracized. You can get people's entire lives blasted on public for everyone to see making them, their family and friends unsafe for most likely the rest of their lives.
With how America specifically is going, it's a very good chance that being queer in public or openly is going to go away again and you have got to keep it to your fucking self when you're given the right to know someone is queer or not. Just because they don't preform queerness to your expectation or the way you like to see it doesn't mean you get to out them.
Some people don't have the ability to go back in the closet either, so keep your mouth shut when talking about queerness that isn't directly related to you.
You will endanger people. You will hurt people and if you do this knowingly or uncaring, then you are exactly like the fucking fascists who are aiming to run this country very soon.
One thing that's funny about being a big retrotech nerd is that I sometimes completely forget that for many people, this is so absolutely alien.
Like people will be like "oh man I haven't seen a VHS tape since I was like 5 and we visited my grandparents who still had a player and I said 'memaw, why are your dvds so big and square' and everybody laughed" and I'm like... I have a VCR in my living room. I found a random VHS tape in my car on Sunday. I have betamax tapes in my living room. I bought laserdiscs THIS WEEK. This shit is so normalized to me that I'm just amazed when people are surprised to see a 3.5" floppy disk. I mean, I love them too (obviously) but ya'll get pretty excited for them. Not even a 5.25" or something weirder like an 8" or a zip disk? Okay!
Like when I did that THE BIG ONE post I knew it'd get some response but I was surprised how much people just loved seeing & hearing a dot matrix printer. I have like three in my garage! They're just normal for me.
I dunno. It just makes me happy to see people amazed and excited for all the stuff I take for granted these days
Correction: I have two VCRs in my living room. I don't know why the second one is there
It’s more a Tiktok thing but I went to outside. To a PARK for this.
hey since i’m occasionally giving out adult advice. anyone wanna know my very adult and very boring and very sensible suggestion for grief gifts for friends and family when someone close to them dies
alright. this is shamelessly stolen from my godparents when they did this when my grandma passed about ten years ago, and since then i’ve been on both sides of this and it’s surprisingly thoughtful and useful. this is particularly important when people are like, in charge of funeral prep, but anyone who just heard someone close to them just died is gonna be in a certain headspace, so it probably works regardless. people are gonna be sending cards and flowers and other very nice, but ultimately useless gifts.
don’t do that. go to the grocery store and order one of those deli party platters. the ones with like, four different kinds each of meats and cheeses, maybe some sides, and veggies, and bread, and condiments. get the vegetarian version if you know they’re vegetarians. whatever. you know better than i how many people are gonna be eating it, but guess maybe, like, four day’s worth of food.
because, here’s the thing. cards and flowers are very nice, and remind you that you’re in people’s thoughts. but you know what you just. don’t even want to think about when someone dies? making dinner. going to the grocery store. ordering takeout. whatever. you don’t want to have to think about food. you just want to eat in between planning a funeral and working through your grief.
without getting too into it, when my grandma died, we were thrown for a loop. and we ate nothing but what was on that goddamned deli platter for days. because it was quick and easy and fresh and tasted good and we didn’t have to think about food. and ten years later, i don’t remember those cards or flowers, but i sure as hell remember the deli platter.
so next time someone’s going through something, when a family member or close friend just passed. go to your nearest grocery store, and if you can, walk a deli platter over to their place. as soon as you can after you hear. they may look at you weird when you hand it to them, but trust me, in the long run they’re gonna thank you.
^^This
Food helps. I don’t remember the cards & flowers. What I DO remember is the amazing lasagna somebody made me. It fed me for a week during a time when I was simply incapable of finding or preparing meals. The deli platter is an interesting twist on that and I’m filing that away for sure.
honeybaked ham delivers
When my dad died, everything was a black blur of grief and nobody could even really approach taking basic care of ourselves. A family friend made and brought over a HUMONGOUS batch of jambalaya, and it is basically the chief reason nobody fainted from hunger.
When my father died 18 years ago: I remember that friends and family had flowers delivered and that was nice - but I don’t even remember what kind of flowers or colors.
I remember my mom’s best friend at the time landing on our doorstep with BAGS of groceries that fed us for a couple of weeks.
When my mother died nearly a year ago: I know that a cousin ordered a bouquet of flowers and they were lovely.
What I remember is my mom’s friends landing in my doorstep with bags of groceries that kept me going for a while so I didn’t have to think about feeding myself because I was absolutely lost in a sea of grief and being suddenly Alone and just in a daze of “What the fuck just happened? Why am I alone? Where are you? WHY AM I ALONE? What do I do now?”
When my body finally DEMANDED I ingest sustenance - I didn’t have to think about it; I just went for the easy stuff and got it done with.
This is why Jews sit shiva. You have to take a week to grieve and have people bring you food and emotional support, it’s honestly something I wish more cultures had. We don’t need flowers we need people to help us hold ourselves together, and sometimes that means just bringing a plate of cheese and crackers so the grieving person doesn’t have to cook.
Yes! If you or the person who is grieving lives in a Jewish area, you can usually find a Jewish deli that offers Shiva Platters.
If it’s a good one, they’ll call the grieving folks and work out what they need and when to make sure they are helping the best way they can.
My mom and I both work for the state, specifically in IT in different but related areas; almost everyone in our units knew both of us pretty well sometimes for years or decades, either having worked with one or both of us, worked near one or both of us, or in a couple of cases, changed my diapers.
When my dad died, my unit’s condolences were a MASSIVE MASSIVE MASSIVE variety sandwich tray from Jason’s Deli and all the things that hygo with giant sandwich platters (chips, fruit tray, cookie tray, potato salad maybe? some other things, this is like the BIG PARTY PACK or something). I mean, even with me, mom, two sisters, four kids, a BIL, and a sister’s boyfriend, that was five days of food at minimum. Mom’s unit, on the other hand, sent both cash–not loose cash, someone took the time to convert it into practical tens and twenties–and one or two extremely generous Visa cards.
(I”m ninety-nine percent sure this was a collaborative effort between our units.)
Simple food that required no effort whatsoever even in ‘washing dishes’, just pick up and chew; cash so we’d have that on hand if we needed it without having to go to an ATM or the bank or remember where the debit card is; the Visa gift cards because we work for the state, our names and salaries are not only public knowledge but PUBLISHED IN THE NEWSPAPER EVERY YEAR, and funerals and incidentals are expensive, especially when you don’t see them coming and you’re a public servant.
It was the most intensely practical and also utterly personal help we could have possibly gotten: it was exactly what we needed in exactly the form we needed, and so incredibly kind. It said “we’re sorry for your loss”, but it also said “we grieve with you”.
Grief is always hard and nothing can really help that, but what they did made living with grief so much easier, and I’ve never forgotten that.
dr who’s on first, doctor strange is on second and doctor house is on third. theres no way theyre getting through a single inning
so who’s on first?
That’s right 👍🏻
that’s strange
No, he’s on second.
Well how’s he on second if he’s on first?
No no no, House is on third. Second base is Strange.
Well this whole darn thing is strange but what I’m asking is who’s on first?
Naturally.
Naturally.
So Naturally is the first baseman?
No. The first baseman is Who.
Well I don’t know that so how’s about you tell me?
House is on Third.
I’m not asking you about third base I’m asking you about first base.
Who’s on first!
This is horrible
Dr Horrible is the pitcher, not first base
That’s not what I’m asking about! No!
Scientifically the most pure thing on our wretched mess of a planet.
Bambi and Thumper!!!
What’s great about this is that rabbit is totally ‘binkying’, which is that really high jump they make when they are super happy and excited! He loves his deer friend! <3
don’t you rather mean, he deerly loves his friend?
fuck you
While others may have learned different terms upon starting, unless you're the Pope declaring this it ain't valid!
my favorite thing about this post is all the people who chose to use the default icon defending themselves in the notes like no stop it just put a picture up
Loving this energy
*wipes tear* they learn tumblr culture so fast . . . the spite . . . the malicious compliance of it all . . . I'm so proud
reblog if you wear glasses. too many mutuals don't know they have glasses wearers in their midsts
reblog this post to fill the person you reblogged from with hope and let them see the better side of things
Is this true, am i punk
I feel like I don't wear enough leather jackets to be punk
Well I do hate fascism and I am transgender and I left the tech industry because I couldn't bear being a part of that capitalist cesspool of human rights violations but also I really really care about my mom
really caring about your mom is extremely punk as well, don't worry.
Oh okay
some observations on color coding eyewear in ficton and their meanings
