This Blog Is A Mess

Just got home from the Barbie movie and wow.

I can't stop thinking about how beautifully the Barbie movie portrays that often times when men (speaking in very binary terms, apologies) are hurt and feel wronged they'll act out in ways that hurt people, may that be purposefully or inadvertently. And society enforces this. Meanwhile women, who are used to living in a hostile world, will often express and process their pains in ways that don't harm others.

But Ken never wanted to hurt anyone. He just was hurt and didn't know how to deal with it. He found the first thing that gave him an outlet and some inkling of comfort and latched onto it. And after Ken has had his supposed "villain arc", Barbie isn't mad at him. She lets him know it's okay to cry.

The villain was never Ken himself, it was the fact that society is built in a way that prevents men from having ways to safely process and regulate their emotions. A society that punishes men for crying and confiding in friends and wanting to be comforted.

The Barbie movie isn't anti men. It's a big fuck you to our society that is hellbent on keeping everyone in an eternal cycle of hurt.

I’m having trouble taking much of the criticism of Barbie (2023) seriously after noticing that alot of the “complaints” being leveled against it are very similar, if not than the exact same as the ones thrown at movies like Turning Red (2022).

These complaints circle around, in no specific order, the film being “weird” / unrelatable, pushing an agenda, having too many women in general, etc.

Movies like Turning Red and Barbie are, to be blunt, not catering to men. Each of them is positioned around women’s experiences; Turning Red honing in on the adolescent world and mind of middle school girls just living, and Barbie (minor spoilers) tackles existentialism, the patriarchy, and womanhood as a whole by examining it as a foreign and over simplified concept.

The second a film doesn’t gravitate around mens’ experiences, the violent rejection by men of that movie is almost comical to watch.

Barbie, to make it worse, condemning the film entirely dares to make fun of men’s ( as enabled by the patriarchy) ridiculousness and obsession with power trips.

Which makes me sort of scoff at some of the “criticism” the film is and will be facing.

barbie is not a feminist because she’s a doll, but your memories are real & they matter & they’re barbie

BARBIE SPOILERS AND THEMES DISCUSSION BELOW

I want to talk a little bit about how the Barbie Movie also showed the pain that patriarchy inflicts on men.

Because in the beginning Ken is extremely excited about it. He’s finally feeling acknowledged and respected in a way he’s never been before. It’s something that every person deserves and something that Barbie acknowledges and apologizes for at the end-that she didn’t treat Ken with real respect.

But the only way to ACTUALLY get and MAINTAIN respect in a patriarchal society is to be masculine the “right” way. You can’t cry, you have to be tough, you have to see other men as a threat in a lot of cases. This is painful. This is a terrible thing to have to maintain-just like it’s terrible to have to maintain the facade of being the “perfect” woman.

I really interpret the main point of the patriarchy as a conflict in the Barbie movie to be a depiction of how gender essentialism is incredible stressful and painful to have to conform to.

And at the end Ken admits that he really didn’t care about the patriarchy all that much and lost interest when he learned it wasn’t just about horses (also we Stan a horsegirl Ken). He hides his emotions and tears because after learning about the patriarchy he believes he HAS to in order to still earn respect.

And yes OBVIOUSLY the patriarchy hurts women (including trans women of course always-fuck off terfs) a lot more in a lot more ways, but a big part of feminism really is about acknowledging the ways that everyone suffers under patriarchy and gender essentialism.

It was actually really nice to see that acknowledged in the movie, along with the acknowledgment that these societal structures are really just made up!

Barbie movie was so good what the fuck. It deserves awards.

Ya know, when I went to see The Barbie Movie, I wasn’t expecting the message of “you have the right to live because you exist.” And if you excuse me I’m going to go cry for the rest of the week-

I can’t stop thinking about how perfectly Barbie portrays girlhood and growing up… How you’re born in a perfect pink world, where you make the rules and get to prioritise whimsies and friendship and beauty, and then you notice something has changed, you discover that something is wrong with you, and you’re offered an illusion of choice, but even if you’d rather keep wearing your heels and go home and be safe and comfortable, you have to choose the Birkenstock, you have to leave your home, you have to grow up. So you’re thrust into this gritty, unfeeling world, where you’re scrutinised and suppressed, where you want to disappear into yourself, because everything is harsh and big and you are tiny and fragile and inadequate. And as overwhelming and impossible as it seems, you survive it. You find truth in the things you believed in when you were young, the inherent good in humanity, connection and love; your friends who look at you while you are crying, and tell you that they cannot imagine what it is that you do not like about yourself.

that one scene where ruth shows barbie what it's like to be human and it's just scenes of humans at birthday parties... humans dancing... humans playing in the park... humans doing mundane and everyday things and having FUN meant so much to me. the fact that it didn't include extraordinary things that only a few people accomplish in their lives but rather things almost every human as experienced, or a FEELING that almost every human has felt - joy, happiness, love - was so beautiful and important. you don't need to be the president or a nobel prize winner to be barbie, because barbie isn't about all that. yeah those are things that several barbies HAVE been and it's not impossible to be them, but stereotypical barbie is just... barbie. and she's enough as barbie. she doesn't need to be anything else. she doesn't need to win an award to be happy. she can just go to the gynecologist with the same smile. she's just barbie and that's everything. and who's barbie if not all of us.

Oh? Oh Greta Gerwig? Putting a Barbie using a mobility aid to dance front and centre? Putting her front and centre for a dance sequence and making her the centre of attention? Just like that? To personally make me sob tears of joy? During July?

The Barbie movie isn't about girl power. It's not about how women can do everything they set their mind to. It's about how sometimes women are tired and average and that has to be okay too, because you don't have to do everything to be worth anything. (And that this is also true of men.)

thinking about the scene in barbie where she asks for permission to be herself and she's told she doesn't need permission, and no one can give her permission for that, because it's just something you start doing

thinking about the scene in barbie where they say you don't need to be exceptional to have worth and deserve love, because just getting through the day is often hard enough

also thinking about the scene in barbie where barbie tells a bunch of construction workers she doesn't have a vagina and the construction workers who have no context beyond her being a pretty girl are like "oh okay that's cool"

go watch Barbie

did do the barbenheimer double feature and didn’t expect horsies to be so prominent in both films. anyways

here to remind u that nico di angelo is a murderer. he's an arsonist. he's an anti-hero character. remember to support gays' rights but most importantly to support gays' wrongs !! ur fav has killed people <3

Big shoutout and thank you to our dear friend @jerk-bending for the delightful meme of Silly Willy being the absolute legendary king he is

Hot take that needs to be said via antiwork

hey, do you all remember that time disney made an entire musical about workers unionizing because of unfair labor practices and striking against the evil rich company owners and it being a massive victory when the workers actually won? yeah, disney sure doesn’t.