I'd rather see you with someone else than me, I know you'll be happier, I know you'll be in better hands, I know you'll be getting the love you deserve, I just know I'm not good enough for you. I never will be.
It hurts so much but I love it
bad-stuff-is-good-stuff reblogged
a dream
you know when people ask me if i’m okay i say i’m fine. i tell them it was mutual. but when the moon is at its heights and im looking out the window of my apartment i’m not looking through the dirty window of my 1 bedroom; i’m looking through the clear glass of what could have been our house. i look onto the dimly lit city where we could have lived. and when i turn around i want to turn into our room. i want to see you laying in bed cuddling the pillow i put there so i can get up and open the window and let the cool october breeze into our house. as i finish my liquor and pack the sun comes up, i feel a warm breath behind me asking why i’m up this early. i want it to be you. your warm body over my cold soul but it’s just my fucking imagination. and as i wake up in a cold sweat i realize that the dream i just woke up from was just that. a dream
Thought this was the homerun, the final stretch, the last time I ever played this game, oh, how wrong I was. It ended and I was craving more, I wanted you back so bad, I was a mess, no one to love, no one to talk to, no one to turn to when I was lying there, broken, a complete fucking mess. You were my game, love was the ball, and I was hitting the ball further and further away, each time I took a bit. I didn't realize, how important that ball was to me, and how important it was to the game, it was too late
I never thought it would end, a roller coaster just full of emotions like love and lust and hatred. I never knew that we would go from being the closest we've ever been to not talking at all. I never knew that you were the one who wasn't trying. I constantly blamed myself for not being good enough and just gave up on you. I don't regret it. I'm happier now.
It hurts to see you with someone else. It tears me apart to know that you're happier with them than you are with me. I can't take the fact that you've forgotten about me, I can't take the fact that you've replaced me. It's all a bit too much.
Love's a twisted game, one that will kill you if you can't handle the pressure. It's a spectator sport for maniacs, an alamanac of heartbreaks once the games over. Each play has consequences. Each play has fouls. No one wins. Ever.
Shit always brings me down no matter what. Whether I'm happy, sad, pissed or just in a weird mood swing sort of situation, the smallest things you do put me off. You just left me for no reason and decided to start a new life, thinking that I was gonna ruin it. Little did you know that your secrecy would cost you dearly, and now you're paying the price.
I'm drowning in my fears, my weaknesses, the negativity that surrounds me. It's a black curtain, coming around from the sides of my vision. I gave in, I gave up. It was too much to take in, too much to accept, too much to forget.
bad-stuff-is-good-stuff reblogged
You’re so fucking blind it pisses me off. When are you going to realise your actions have fucking consequences. When are you gonna realise I’m not gonna stick around for someone who doesn’t even want me let alone respect me.
Aight, you do you Hun, I'ma give up on us, it's all that's left.
It's hard to have someone who expects a lot from you, especially when it becomes a bit too much to handle. It's difficult to cope with the pressure and the pain of knowing that you failed them. It's hard to know that she's sitting there, dissapointed, angry. It's hard. It really is.
Living in a dream, thinking about the nightmares. Looking at how it scared us all, how it made us weaker, how it helped us grow, into people we thought we could never be.
I just don't know anymore. I feel like I have no one, no one at all. My life's a complete mess and there are so many reasons to it. It's like people aren't really my friends and that they don't care about me. It's like I'm surrounded by fake people who just want me for something I have or want me to be someone I'm never gonna be, only because I'm scared that I'd hurt someone who won't approve of me. I'm just in a massive blackhole of thoughts that surround me and haunt me everyday. I'm just giving up on life as each second passes by. I'm just not gonna care anymore.
You turned into something I never thought I'd see, literally changing right in front of my eyes, and all you did was hurt me in the process. You found fault in everything I did, when all I was trying to do was turn you back to your oldself, you forced me to give up on you, you drove me to the point of insanity, I couldn't take it, I had to let go.