if you actually acted like you loved me the way you say you do i'd be less insecure.

bet you'll go and text him like nowts the matter.

you will never choose me. you will never just choose me.

if you actually wanted to be with me then you would, you'd try. but the fact you don't try makes me think i'm just here because you can't let go. i mean nothing to you in retrospect so why do i bother

you don't care tbh. you couldn't care less abt what i say or what i do, how i feel about you doesn't matter to you in the slightest

you leave me with more questions than answers. i want to know if you want to get back together or not but you seem to deflect and dodge the question every time i ask - this is what makes me think you don't mean what you say :/

i cant read tones. we know this. but i cannot shake the feeling that you don't love me as much as you say you do , like you're only saying you do just because you're worried i'm gonna spiral if i don't. i constantly want to cry, i constantly want you here, or me there. i just feel like there's something more to you that you won't tell me and i can't figure out. it's killing me because i'm overthinking and damaging myself over it.

i fucked up so badly man. i really wish i knew how i was acting so i could've fixed it sooner. i really wish we can just go back to how we were. i wish you were as devoted to me as i am you.

this sucks. i'm slowly killing myself over something that's probably nothing.

crying at work isn't the vibe i wanted today

idk how to get you to love me again so fml

i want to be your first choice. i want you to talk to me. because ik when i sleep you're just gonna talk to him all night and that's where it starts, late night convos. i don't want to be that fucking person.

looking at him makes me want to kill myself

it's all fine and well telling me not to worry but at the end of the day he's your type on paper and i've been nothing but absent for you lately. so im right to be worried , im right to be insecure and feel inferior.

i wish i didn't care so much. i feel void. i feel VOID.

why do i feel like i'm being punished for something.

i think i've always known you.

i think i've always known you, in past lives and in future ones, parallel universe lives and whole other worldly lives. i think it will always be this painful, no matter which life it is, i think things will always be against us, no matter which life it is.

i think i'd be letting down all my other lives by giving up so easily, you said not too long ago you wanted us to get back together but you don't think we will - i think we will, i think we owe it to ourselves, past, present and future to atleast stick it out a bit longer.

i think we both need fixing and we both need to do a lot of growing up, it'd be a shame if our past versions of ourselves were to look at us pair of failures for giving in at this point.

i say, stick it out, i'll work on me , you work on you, i'd love to say i haven't thought about giving up altogether but i have, and each scenario is more painful than the last.

stick with me , my love that's all i'd ask.

part of me wants to actually spin your jaw, the other wants me to hug you and let it all out. tbh idk how much longer i can go on like this.

this is so unhealthy it's actually killing me but i cant let it go

oh that's so rich

i'd much rather actually try and kill myself rather than talk to LITERALLY anyone right now🤠

eeeh mate. you couldn't make this up