Bless whatever I was going through in 2019 that merited me to leave this review for domino's pizza

i think we can all agree it's a bit of a missed opportunity electronics don't have a "milk socket" you could plug some sort of milk battery into, which would slowly disperse milk into the body of the machine, possibly ruining it.

Do you ever forget that you have a gender to most people….. meaning that random people at the grocery store see me as a woman and not just a little internet guy

not even kidding when I say I should look like this

It's that time of night, have my favorite tiktok of all time

ICP's new beer says "slap his pussy, slap her dick, slap this down it'll slap you lit"

... Trans rights 🤡 woop woop

hired a galapagos finch at my burger joint and after 2 generations it evolved to take peoples orders

gambling with angels is easy. they can't lie but they have addictive personalities; it's easy to clean them out then make them divulge secrets about the business of heaven to call your bets. my dad used to say "hey, watch this" and summon angels to play poker with him with a sort of bone flute he inherited from his grandpa, and they'd be holding horseshit and still want to call him. i'm talking "raise on a two pair" level bad at it, but they couldn't stop trying to win. my dad taught me all the secret names of God before i was out of grade school and i would use them to curse my enemies so they came down with leprosy. you can cure leprosy these days but it still sucks, especially for a child. but they had it coming for pissing me off

Hey you know that really disturbing thing where you yawn and your salivary gland shoots a concentrated spray of saliva out of one of its horrid nozzles like you’re a venom spitting snake for some godawful reason

this is the most distressing post ive ever read because not only have i never once seen or even heard of this but there are dozens of people in the notes reaffirming it with shit like “yeah i do that all the time” “i had a friend who could do this on command” what the real, genuine fucking fuck

okay do yoh guys ever think about the fact that “high quality” is an actual descriptor like theres high quality tea leaves high quality fabrics high quality espresso beans etc but because of advertising everything that is said to be “high quality” on the package is just because it supposedly sells better. but not everything is high quality so it is a lie. a descriptor becomes meaningless because it sounds good. what if we were just honest. why cant you say this coffee beans arent the best but they will do the job. i would be happy with okay if it didnt lie

my autism diagnosis has nothing to do with this

artistic rendition of my act 3 wyll

its not my fault if he is literally dionysus ok