Child walking into animal shelter and walking out with a single ant on a leash
mr evil man: im going to kill you! hahaha 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪
terrified woman: ahhhhhh!!!!!
the sauropods outside:
hey what are they doing
imagine if aliens found the dead body of a human being exploded in the vacuum of space and they started making fun of the mutilated corpse calling it “splatter alien” and saying it was the ugliest alien in the whole galexy. and then made stuffed animals of it to sell to their alien kids. that’s what happened on this planet to the blob fish
fight the slander. post pressurized blobfish
still a bit of a weird looking cunt if I'm being fully honest.
just because someone is your favorite character doesnt mean theyd have the same moral alignment as you. wheatley from portal wouldnt say "my pronouns are he/him, thank you for asking!" hed say "what uhh. what does that mean. um. you mean the nouns im most "pro" at is that what youre saying? i like to think im pretty pro,, at all nouns really. umm lets see... apple, kazoo, bubble, happy, door, umm... cake. not too fond of cake really i think its alright but. not my Favorite. if it were up to me though id eat a whole cake in one sitting. if i were a human. not a human, clearly. also not sure if id, know what cake even tastes like. if i tried it. no tastebuds. no Mouth... no. hole. anywhere on my body. haha um,, well anyways id. id say im pretty Pro Nouns. dont see why anyone wouldnt be... what? you mean what i Go By? what do you. ohhhh. ummm. the male ones. the male pronouns. if i can remember what they are... definitely the ones for guys. manly men. like me. pretty sure im a man,,," and you need to accept this
im like if a girl was {undefined variable}. im like if a girl was [fragment missing]. im like if a girl was (editor’s note: the author’s invocation of the word “girl” in this context is idiosyncratic, perhaps metaphorical) im like if a girl was im like if a girl draft deleted! im like if a girl You have reached your free article limit! Subscribe now to continue reading. im like if a girl was [THREAD LOCKED] im like if a girl (ENDING EXPLAINED!) im like if a girl Unusual activity detected, please highlight all the pictures of bicycles. im like if a girl I don’t respond to prompts that could be deemed offensive, and so I am unable to carry out the request. im-like-if-a-girldeactivated03092023. im like if a girl we are unable to take your call at the minute. im like if a girl isn’t registered under that name. im like if a girl could give you her date of birth. im like if a girl oh yes we have you under […]. im like if a girl LOST CONNECTION
judy hopps is a cop who leverages a strangers felony tax evasion to get him to put his life in danger and work around the clock so that she can keep her job
she then presumably helps him cover up his crime to get him a job on the same police force
judy hopps has some very nice feet but we need to remember that she’s still a cop
just fyi for everyone out there using tumblr on this day that you can reblog a post without the extra commentary by clicking the OP’s URL on the original post
She is a cop and all cops are already unsexy
I’m sorrynotsorry to everyone in the notes just learning that Tumblr is a place for horny furries to blog about acab.
Unfortunately, Judy Hopps is very sexy AND ALSO a cop and therefore a bastard, and insisting that all cops are automatically unsexy is still attaching appearances to morality. Remembering that things can be sexy and evil, or ugly and good is imperative! Forgetting this derails and disrupts the conversation.
So I went down to the Marianna Trench the other day and took a bunch of pics!! There were so many cool critters down there check these out:
I fucked up so badly on this sudoku page no ones ever gonna wanna have sex with me
my dad refuses to watch breaking bad and i asked him why once and he was like "i dont like how mean he is to his wife :("
i shouldn't be surprised because this is the same man who refused to be in the room when my brother and i watched zack and cody as kids because "zack doesn't respect women"
im glad yall think my 60 year old father is based I'll be sure to tell him that the gay people in my phone think he's cool
*after you confess your love for me* .....oooohkay lol *looks up at the night sky* Moon looks like shit today
White boy shocks staff at chinese restaurant by ordering in perfect ancient sumerian
that onion headline that's like "whatever. the emo kids are all sitting on each other's lap" is their realest one yet
Therapy is not enough, I need to eat pasta with the person I love on a sunny afternoon in an Italian vineyard.












