why does kylie jenner even need to darken her skin isn’t she dark enough already standing in her sisters’ shadows

white professors be like

Yooo

The Disgusting Story of My Life in The South

does anyone else have “the chair”

(345/365) by (DS)

"like, 9/11 was an inside job scoob!"

Government Secret #192

The Joker was just playing pranks that always seemed to backfire - he didn’t really mean to hurt anyone

Government Secret #185

There is a giant barbecue sauce factory in Austin that powers the entire state of Texas

Government Secret #172

Years ago the U.S. replaced the Earths’ crust with pizza crust

Government Secret #133

Hilary Clinton was also having an affair with Monica Lewinsky

Government Secret #117

Billy Mays is alive and is the reason the White House is so clean

Government Secret #89

Chopping down the cherry tree was just a euphemism and George Washington was actually caught diddling himself

Government Secret #82

The US Government has made it illegal for Taco Bell to deliver. They would become too powerful.

Government Secret #81

The moon landing was staged, and so was every official space expedition until NASA developed the technology to safely explore outer space in the late 90s. The first real successful space voyage was shown to the public in disguise as Britney Spears’s Oops I Did It Again video.

Government Secret #74

the government is secretly controlled by Bill Nye the Science Guy

Government Secret #54

We’ve already rigged the election of 2056 so that Blue Ivy Carter would win

Government Secret #47

We created meninism to figure out which men shouldn’t reproduce

Government Secret #45

Josh Peck ran over Oprah and she actually died. Everything involving Oprah since that incident has been done by a stunt double. RIP Oprah 2006

Government Secret #39

National Treasure: Book of Secrets is historically accurate