then I freaked it

Bigfoot is fake

he only calls me when he needs money or snacks or a place to hide

i’m having a stroke

Extroverts:

Introverts:

rich people paid 100k to go to trump’s 1 year anniversary party and he’s not gonna even be there because he has to stay in DC to deal with the government shutdown

some rich people even paid 250k to sit at the same dinner table as trump……… 

this is like dashcon but for the super rich power elites I’m screaming

Fyre Festival

Super rare to hear someone sound exactly like the track

Fellas is it gay to fall in love with another man and spend your life with him 🤔

I think that is the literal definition of gay

Just found out neanderthal passed on the DNA for depression and now we know why they stayed in caves and painted horses all fuckin day 

Reblog if you’re a depressed neanderthal who stays in their cave and paints horses all fuckin day

do men like…..realize that working out and growing a beard isnt a substitute for a personality

do women realize that….

what kind of snake is this

A vicious one

pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of sex education. we’ll do it properly. public: applause pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of snow plowing. we’ll do it properly. public: confused applause

pornhub: chaotic good

what timeline is this

wh….

2018 is the year we revive cereal guy

it begins

apple facing action lawsuits for purposely slowing down older iphones with their software updates. i’m tryna eat off this too might throw a wild claim in there myself

“Slow iphones killed my father”

my armenian father getting angry at a squirrel

“you are. stealink…. my nuts…”

friendly reminder that russia illegally annexed crimea

seduce me with ur history knowledge 

vikings made their woman handle the finances because they thought math is witchcraft

During a military campaign, Vlad the Impaler, the basis for Dracula, once pulled his troops out of a major engagement in a valley at dusk so that the sun was in their enemies’ eyes. Once they were over the hill, they set loose a bunch of rabid bats who flew away from the sun (towards the enemy) and attacked them, leading to significant infection in their ranks, and Vlad’s eventual victory. Because of how the bats appeared from where Vlad’s soldiers appeared to be at dusk, myth stated that the soldiers turned into bats at night, which is where the “Dracula can change into a bat” thing came from.

raphael, the renaissance painter, literally fucked himself to death

during the Ottoman Empire, the Sultan Ibrahim I had 280 of his concubines drowned in the ocean after ONE of them slept with another man.

The earths carbon levels fell by 700 million tons because Genghis Khan killed so many people

King James (the one known for revising the Bible) liked to watch women give birth. That’s where the “tradition” of women laying on their backs to give birth comes from.

Previous to that it was common for women to have chairs with holes in them and straw underneath, so they could sit on this special chair and let gravity help with the birthing process.

Spicy foods were thought to increase libido and cause children to masturbate. To prevent kids from touching themselves at night, a man named Kellogg invented the blandest combination of cereals, marketed it at kids, and called it Corn Flakes

At the Battle of Gettysburg during the American Civil War, a small group of Union soldiers had run out of ammo against a large group of the Confederate Army. In a panic, the Union soldiers sprinted at them, screaming, with only bayonets drawn. The entire Confederate Army that was present turned and ran away in fear, not knowing that they had literally no ammunition.

When the Roman Emperor Caligula went to invade Britain he stood on the coast of Gaul with his army and suddenly declared war on Neptune, God of the Sea. He had his men collect sea shells from the shore as “spoils from the Ocean”.

Oh and he appointed his horse to the senate.

During the Austro-Prussian war of 1868, Liechtenstein sent over an army of 80 people, but ended up coming back with 81 people because they befriended a guy on the other side.

People refused to send art and sculptures to be displayed at the Chicago World’s Fair because of Chicago’s history with fire. They had to fireproof the Fine Arts building to get people to agree to loan them their art. A year after the fair closed most of the grounds were destroyed by fire but the Fine Arts building survived. It’s now the Museum of Science and Industry.

The carbon emissions thing from Ghenghis Khan is not the whole story. He also planted trees wherever he conquered land because he liked trees and thought they were important. He conquered enough to make an impact on the global climate.

Radu III, brother of Vlad III( Vlad the Impaler)  nearly killed Mehmed II, the future Sultan of the Ottoman’s, after Mehmed invited him up to his chambers. Radu, seemingly unaware that the offer was sexual in nature, was startled when Mehmed embraced and then tried to kiss him. Radu stabbed the prince in the leg, then ran and hid in a tree. They later became lovers, and maintained a relationship for the rest of their lives

Just googled the last one because holy shit that’s magnificent and seemed to good to be true, but not only did it actually happen, but I also learned that radu was known as “radu the beautiful”

fun date idea: stab him in the leg

This is the greatest video ever posted on the internet

Fun Fact: Kittens learn to hunt their prey using their mother’s tail. This is so cute cause this tail is a lot faster than a cat’s tail but the kitten is doing their best. ❤🐈

Cute :)

So what I’m hearing is that training with a dog is going to turn this cat into the APEX PREDATOR