This is how Jacob started to fall for Kaylee
Play a warlock character who calls himself Vithimorex or something like that. Always mention how grateful you are to your patron, Frank, for the wondrous powers he gives you.
Slowly reveal that the powers you get from Frank are things like “sense of smell” and “verbal communication”. As it turns out, Vithimorex is an extradimensional Thing possessing the person formerly known as Frank. All the eldritch blasts and shadow conjurations are boring powers according to Vithimorex. He can’t wait for the level 14 ability to understand and appreciate music.
Also, I realized something about the name I made up, so here’s a song:
When the moon splits in two and your nightmares come true, Vithimorex...
When the world seems to bleed since the dead god was freed, Vithimorex...
That is definitely a fun RPG idea
Since July is Disability Pride Month
(as opposed to every other month when we're all demure about disability rights /gentle sarcasm)
I wanted to highlight one of my favorite artists: Liberal Jane.
Ppl dying their hair and wearing ‘punk’ clothes & having social cause pins but being visibly repulsed by homeless, broke &/or disabled people is embarrassinggg. I’m already goin outta my way to show ppl im not gonna sacrifice their dog to the devil. You are making this harder for me
Hauling my disabled ass up when someone asks for a seat on the train because one of the alt queers gotta. People take note of who helps them and who pretends they don’t exist. Dressing like someone cool doesn’t automatically make you cool, you gotta do the actions! What’s the BLM pin on your bag mean if you treat an old black woman asking for help like she’s an annoyance that will disappear if you ignore.
Obviously queer punk lookin kids are not the main group treating others like shit; I’m addressing them here because they are, theoretically, my peers. If you want a punk appearance to mean anything these days you gotta back it with action, being nice to people who are societally treated like shit will make you stand out more than clothes ever will
mslovejoy
blacksirencry
me tryna find out if this fool died
“The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.”
Holy shit
thelizardprincess
And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore
Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!!
gerbthenerd
Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this
I mean OP pretty much covered it. A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
But ask and you shall receive, On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD. YOU’RE DEAD. EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN.
There are many things that will kill you. [citation needed]
There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST.
There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in.
Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you). THE. WHOLE. OCEAN.
Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus.
It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these. But not without immediate medical attention. Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish.
The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you. There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide. It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis. It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly. It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm. Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the LD50 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)). This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you.
DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS.
Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE.
A cone snail walks into a bar. You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND.
Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra. Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin. Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it. Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough.
I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin:
- “Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.”
- “The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.”
Remember how the LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg? Conotoxin is 160 times more potent. FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.
I DID SOME MATH.
IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.)
Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.”
THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY.
And guess what? Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging. Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you. Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight. Oh no. It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON. It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria.
Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever. “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask. And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra. Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.” That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine.
Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin. In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock. BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE.
IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off. And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST.
And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death.
Don’t touch the pretty shells.
this is a WONDERFUL use of the medium of the tumblr post
YES.
A perfect educational rant.
Minute traces of tetrodotoxin are what makes fugu (pufferfish) sashimi such an exciting entrée. Improperly prepared fugu can be very exciting indeed, to the extent that the over-excited diner loses interest in anything else.
Like, for instance, breathing.
The end part
Behind the scenes of Godzilla (1998)
man why didn’t they just have this guy fight him off. dude’s huge
i wouldn't fight godzilla if i was this dude's size, for roughly the same reason i wouldn't fight a komodo dragon at the size i currently am
Not even to save New York?
what has new york ever done for me
Thinking like that is the reason Uncle Ben died
for the love of god unmute
Muted it took me 6 seconds to figure out what was going on. Unmuted I had tears in my eyes 3 seconds in
siphonophores will never not freak me out. stop doing that its SCARY but also please don’t ever stop doing that you ethereal marine cryptid
the red shape is a person of average height. the green line is one of these freaks. btw
there is a demon in your house named CARBON MONOXIDE. he enchants your mind with confusion and your body with exhaustion. you need to call a powerful exorcist named HVAC TECHNICIAN
One of the best exorcists in the land, I’ve heard!
Succubi/incubi can't cross a circle of corn flakes
\
John Harvey Kellogg
Thanks to @cryptotheism, I get the joke, lemme try to explain it for people whose weird random knowledge doesn’t happen to include this particular bit of weird random knowledge. Disclaimer: I am looking up exactly zero things for this, it’s just me going off of memory; if I get anything more than “the vague gist of it” accurate, that’ll be an unexpected bonus.
So basically Kellogg was a freak, in that special kind of “so focused on ‘sex is bad’ that it circles all the way back around”. We’re talking “chastity cages and enemas, all day every day, what do you mean, it’s totally not a sex thing” here. He thought that the normal breakfast foods of his time, they gave people too much energy which would make them want to masturbate, which was bad. So he came up with the single most bland-ass food he could think of, and popularized it as a health thing. Or maybe that was his brother; but either way, that’s where corn flakes came from, one dude’s attempts to make people less horny.
There’s a whole tradition of “supernatural creatures can’t cross a ring of material that is antithetical to their nature”, which is normally something like “salt” or “iron”; but yeah, I suppose one could make an argument that “cereal intended to make people less horny” should ward off “demons of lust”, going by that logic.
bye i love this
lowoncliches
Man: Siri, what is 1 trillion to the tenth power? Siri: Calculation. The answer is one zero zero zero zero zero [continuing] Man: *starts beatboxing to the rhythm. Woman 1: *joins in* Woman 2: *starts singing to the rhythm*
blonde-vulcan
This is sO GOOD
ricetwink
never gets old
I could listen to this on loop for hours.
A correct to the transcript:
The man is beat boxing. The first woman joined in with jathiswaram. The second woman starts alap/alapanai.
things i am learning now that i’m finally actually watching avatar the last air bender part one:
1) not everyone is a bender 2) it does appear to be inherent to some extent, because katara seems to be partially self-taught 3) however, there is a learning element, because you can improve on your skills and the avatar has to learn how to master all four elements where i thought aang just had inherent skill 4) the element of the bender seems to always match the element of the tribe they’re in, which makes sense if they are taught by their tribe but raises some questions if it’s inherent. is bending ability passed genetically? what happens if two benders of different elements have a kid? i can’t google this because i don’t want anymore spoilers than i already have 5) uncle iroh is prince zuko’s uncle?????????? i thought he was like an earth bender who owned a tea shop this entire fucking time how did i go into this series knowing almost everything but THAT
mcelboycontent
i honestly thought it was an honorary title like he’s a nice old man who helps out all the kids so he just has them call him uncle
OP is a citizen of Ba Sing Se
Absolutely losing it over Vetinari sounding like this as he shoves Moist into a new job title 😂
girl help i’m having creation ideas above my skill level
girl help i'm having creation ideas above my motivation level
girl help I’m having creation ideas above my free time level
asta-lily-deactivated20220630
So I thought this was commonly known internet navigation (but apparently it might just be those of us who have been using the internet since the 90's who still know it). Or so it seems based on... a grumpy comment I got.
When you see an arrow like this:
It means you click it to expand out a hidden section.
It's an accordion section/menu! It's useful in web design to hide information that may be overwhelming under specific headers so people can only see what they need.
Here I'm using it for people who need the content warnings to be able to check, but for those who don't need them and don't want to be spoiled to just move right past without accidentally reading anything.
It's still the user's responsibility to click the arrow and read things as they need! But it is all warned. (And, yes, the all encompassing issues are already a tag on the fic, I'm just providing additonal warnings per chapter.)
Ah, sorry yes! For those who want the html, it's the details and summary tags!
every gym leader is like “I lost!?! UNBELIEVABLE!” buddy you live in a world where every ten year old child has always been offered a free fire breathing monster at least once and you brought nothing to this fight but anthropomorphic flowers
gym leaders’ whole job is to provide a specific challenge, a battle of a certain type and difficulty level. if you’ve brought the tools and skills to complete that challenge, you’re going to win by design. the pokémon in that battle are probably not actually the strongest pokemon they have.
when gym leaders go “argh, how could i lose??” they’re acting to give your victory legitimacy because you’re 10. they’re like a villain cosplayer letting a baby knock them over. they’re being nice!!