Really

Helpful strangers are the best strangers

neck kissing is honestly the hottest, most seductive thing anybody could ever do to me. if you kiss my neck, if you playfully bite my neck, if your tongue touches my neck i will melt in your fingertips.

SO ENGLISH ISN’T MY MOM’S FIRST LANGUAGE AND TODAY THERE WAS A SLUG ON THE STEPS AND

by Pie Comic

when u feel someone else’s embarrassment 

and theyre like

a man walks into a zoo. the only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. it’s a shitzu 

this is literally my favourite joke ever

“what’s your favorite position in bed?”

 near the wall so I can use my phone while it’s charging

i like pop punk bc sometimes its all “im so sad” and sometimes its all “fuck you” and thats me most of the time

my neutral expression makes me look like im always in a bad mood which is convenient because it’s usually true

your baby’s kicking you say? wow discipline your child

A simple guide to picking a great color palette. No matter what the colors are, using colors that are certain distances from each other on the color wheel result in a great contrast of colors. The simple color schemes shown above are used in the most popular logos, posters, websites, paintings, and even movies and television.

this is the greatest blooper