“Y— you’ve saved me! Why?”
“..... Monkey.”
“Why—?”
“Monkey! You have shown me monkey..... Mmm.... Monkey.”
do you own enough books to be considered a library (500+)
aaaaaarrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhh
library status is not about numbers
(even ARL is allowing the "whoever dies with the most stuff wins" library metrics to be pried away from its spindly skeletal fingers, and honestly ARL is kind of the worst for that)
it is about SHARING and (this is the important bit, folks, listen up) DELIBERATE SELECTION OF MATERIALS with CURRENT COMMUNITY NEEDS AND INTEREST in mind
that's why just about all Little Free Libraries are not libraries -- they're not deliberately-built collections aimed at serving the community, they're basically trash-book dumps
now, it's quite possible that Mr. Gaiman's collection has the beforehand deliberation and the intent-to-share-with-community that define a library
but it's also possible that it doesn't, AND THAT'S FINE, IT IS SO TOTALLY FINE, we get to collect stuff to our personal taste and just for us
it's just not a library when we do that, that's all
They're actually doing it
Competitive tumblr scrolling is here
I want to make this absolutely clear to kids: children didn't used to be stuck inside the house like you are today. There used to be public places you could hang out. It used to be fairly safe to walk around because trucks weren't designed to kill children. You didn't need a car to go anywhere so kids without a license weren't trapped. There weren't 24/7 cable news networks constantly scaring parents with anecdotes even as crime was at all time lows and the biggest danger comes from adults kids know not strangers.
It's easy to ignore old people talking about "the good ol' days" because a lot of the people saying that shit are racist assholes, but the way society treats kids today really is objectively worse than how kids used to be treated. You deserve better, and you should know that better things are possible. We just need to kill the suburbs and for-profit news.
When I was a kid in the 80s and 90s, I could go for a bike ride or walk with my sister or friends and we could leave after breakfast and not come back until dinner and our parents weren't worried. We lived on the edge of town, so we could turn left into the woods or turn right and go downtown or go straight and go to a friend's house in the neighborhood. I went to a park or the community pool or went out for ice cream alone from a young age.
I also regularly walked to and from school alone from as young as first grade (so, about age 6). And I'm not saying I walked three miles uphill in snow both ways, but I checked a map and it was over half a mile and crossed at least one street that people drive pretty fast on. And that was normal.
All the same for the ‘60s.
And yet a trace of the true self
Exists in the false self
Oddly enough, the best and simplest summary of what the WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes are about is contained in this extremely sweary Phil Jupitus cartoon. People have been asking me to summarize. This does the job.
(Can someone do the alt text?) I'll do it as a picture and as a link.
[ID: A twelve panel webcomic posted by Phil Jupitus @/phillipjupitus7276 on Instagram.
The first panel reads "Mark Ruffalo and his Sweary Buffalo" in bubble writing with an angry cartoon buffalo saying "Monkey Cock". All the ensuing panels are a conversation between Ruffalo and the buffalo on a red background with speech bubbles.
Ruffalo: Oh blimey! The Screen Actors Guild have called a strike! And me about to pay for speech therapy for my sweary buffalo!
Buffalo: Shit the bed!
(Ruffalo is now wearing a black shirt that says "Hell no, we won't appear on your show" and holding a black sign that reads SAG AFTRA WGA STRIKE.)
Ruffalo: As much as I would like to curtail my ungulate's potty mouth, the strike has to take precedence
Buffalo: Great big sweaty bollocks
(Ruffalo's shirt now says "Mark Smash")
Ruffalo: What the industry fails to address is the changing way the consumer is granted access to the labour of both actors and writers
Buffalo: Knob cheese
(Ruffalo's shirt now says "Act Up!")
Ruffalo: The fact that the payment model for residuals has not been properly adjusted to take into consideration the way that viewers now access content is a major issue
Buffalo: TIt wank tit wank tit wank
(Ruffalo's shirt now says "Actor-vist")
Ruffalo: Also the implications of AI and ownership of the image of an individual requires clarification
Buffalo: Buggery fucktwat
(Ruffalo's shirt now says "Unionize")
Ruffalo: Another sticking point is that streaming services like Netflix, Amazon Prime and Disney Plus will not share viewing figures...
Buffalo: Shit prick turd balls
(Ruffalo's shirt now says "Fuck the algorithm")
Ruffalo: One industry organisation actually proposed scanning actors and owning their very likenesses for future projects without consent or compensation.
Buffalo: Fucksticks
Ruffalo: The issues are complex at least. But producers and studios need to recognise that a proper debate must take place with the unions.
Buffalo: Management are CUNTS
/End ID]
Thank you for spreading the message, Neil! As a fellow screenwriter (non-WGA but still supporting), this is important and a great comic.
We run into some trouble with a vampire, but it all comes together!
Check out the full video here: https://youtu.be/7XPuwF5MMOA
Does Crowley have a mezuzah at his flat? (I recently learned that you referred to Crowley as "your most Jewish character" and I'm Jewish too so that makes me super happy, hence why I'm asking the Jewish questions)
No, he doesn't. Crowley is a Jewish character in the sense that he asks tough questions and wrestles with God. He wasn't born, circumcised or bar mitzvahed. He's an angel who maintains he sauntered vaguely downwards, and now he's a former demon.
There are lots more formally Jewish characters in my fiction. (Harry in Sandman Episode 5 and issue 6, for example.)
Disaster Puppy Content™️
I mean I was fumbling for words to describe Crowley and "disaster" and "puppy" seemed to go so well together.
So poor people don’t deserve to have money?!
THEY’LL JUST WASTE IT ON SURVIVAL!
Also, if you’ve taken more than a high school economics course taught by someone who has never stepped foot in a college economics class,
Giving $500 to poor people multiplies it REALLY FAST. That $500 immediately goes into the economy and ripples more purchases until it hits a rich pocket.
Giving $500 to a billionaire takes $500 out of the economy permenantly. You could have set it on fire and made no difference.
That is such an important part of the conversation that rich people seem to purposefully misunderstand whenever it’s brought up
Money exists to be spent, not hoarded. Yes, people should have saving, but no one should be sitting on a pile of money too big to spend in a single lifetime. “The economy” as a concept only works if people are spending money, and the people hoarding the money are so quick to blame the people who barely have any when the economy starts to fail
Having a big string of numbers in an offshore account doesnt make you an economic genius, it makes you a parasite that is ruining the economy for everyone else
How is bnha anime of the decade...... they aren’t even anime of the hour of the minute of the second
The notes on this post were so toxic that staff just axed em
1969.........
Yes, when the original post is deleted from the server (not just the blog, but the Tumblr servers), there is no root post for notes to be added onto, and also no root post for time to be counted from, so it starts from zero. Most computer operating systems use Unix, which was launched in 1971 with t.he epoch date of midnight on January 1, 1970 as 1. Therefore zero is one second behind that date: December 31, 1969. Also, very unfortunately, this also means nobody except you and anyone you reblog it to will see this explanation, as you cannot open the notes to see comments when there are no notes.
Tumblr is truly one of the webbed sites ever
Hello Mr. Gaiman, what is your take on platypuses?
I am wary of their venomous knees.
Okay but platypus venom is actually one of the weirdest things about them.
So like, everyone knows how famously weird platypuses are. Semi-aquatic egg-laying mammals with duck bills and beaver tails, but too few people mention how strange their venom is.
First of all it's only found on males. I'm no scientist but from my (limited) research, I can't find any other example of a vertebrate where only one sex has venom. Venom in mammals is rare enough already anyway, but sexual dimorphism in the venom in a mammal is all but unheard of.
Next, platypi primarily use their venom on each other. The males produce venom from their leg knives year round, but venom production goes in to overdrive during mating season, leading scientists to believe that they mainly use it on each other to compete for mates. As an additional not here, not only is it injected through their legs, but they use their legs as a vice, trapping their victims between them and repeatedly stabbing.
Now, what the venom actually *does*. It will temporarily paralyze other platypa, but will quickly kill other small animals. There have been no recorded deaths on humans from platy-venom, but if you get stung by one, you'll wish you had been thr first. The pain is "immediate, sustained, and devastating". Fortunately, there have been so few examples of humans being stung that the results are not very well-researched, but what has been seen is enough. It will cause the afflicted area to swell up with extreme pain for days, weeks, or even months. Without end. Even 25 years later there have been reports of continued stiffness and pain in afflicted areas.
I've saved the worst for last though.
It's immune to painkillers.
That's right, even morphine is inadequate to stop the pain from these guys. You get stung? Debilitating, inescapable pain for months on end with lifelong aftereffects.
Tl;dr: you're right to be wary of their venomous knees. Never go near a platypus unless you know for certain it's female.
(Edit: clarified the bit about sexual dimorphism in vertebrates)
Sir
Why the
Fuck
Are you on this broken website?
Because it has a better standard of discourse than Twitter and it amuses me.
Are you staff ?
Yes of course why do you ask
NEW TUMBLR UPDATE:
You can only like 4 posts a day and if you even think of reblogging we're going to blow your brains out
now would be the absolute funniest time for tumblr to unban porn
Done. Everyone that sees this post as much porn as you want/can