You're allowed to find pride in your asexuality and aromanticism. I know it can be difficult, between people not knowing or believing it exists and people who might accept that it exists but will always see it as pitiful and insignificant, something to be silent about, something shameful or "tmi", something to mention as an afterthought. But aromanticism will always be far more complex and far-reaching and life altering and significant than people who brush it off as "doesn't date" are able to understand, and asexuality will always be more nuanced and eye-opening and liberating than people who brush it off as "doesn't have sex" will ever understand. You're allowed to find meaning in these labels and in the communities surrounding them, and you're allowed to show pride for who you are.

queer is such a good word. im queer as in fuck you. queer as in odd. queer as in fucked-in-the-head. queer as in i hope you choke on it. queer as in a slur i laugh at. queer as in not like you. queer as in none of your business. queer as in a line in the fucking dirt. queer as in we’re here. get used to it. queer as in this is who i am and what i am. queer as in im different and i dont fucking care. queer as in with or without you i exist and ill keep doing it. queer as in queer

i'm not "evil" or "broken" for being aromantic. i've been like this my whole life. people kept telling me that I would start to develop crushes, and i would eventually fall in love, head over heels for someone and know what it was like. that i would fantasize about cuddling, kissing and being possessive over someone else.

that day never came. i never developed the urge to kiss or cuddle. i never developed the burning feelings that drive other people to pursue relationships. i never asked anyone out or felt the need to. i never felt like another person was "mine" or "my one and only". i never developed that sense of "special" attraction that everyone told me about. i never understood what people meant when they said those things, and i still don't

my best friend called me "heartless," "mean," "broken," and "evil" for not being able to enjoy romantic plots in media or understand why she liked romance manga so much. she told me i was an "emotional brick wall that needed to be broken down" because something must be "wrong" with me because i didn't gush with love over fictional characters getting together.

there's nothing wrong with me- i've been like this my whole life. i'm not "evil", "mean" or "broken". i'm just me, and part of what makes me me is not feeling romantic attraction or urges. this is a very big part of my personality. i am not obligated to bend myself out of shape to make other people happy. i am this way because i was meant to be. it's not a curse. it's just a state of being.

I am actually so happy with this so posting it here too.

Originally posted on my pride art blog, @pride-flag-planets. Check it out if you want to see/request any pride flag inspired drawings

I feel like there are a lot of nb aspecs and I want to test that theory, reblogs for sample size are much appreciated!

Coming out is a personal choice, and something that should be done because you want to. You don't have to come out if you don't want to. You don't have to come out if you're not ready yet.

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Examples:

Usage notes: (1) Due to how the website works, it will struggle in mobile portrait mode. Try viewing the page in landscape or stick to desktop. (2) Use the cube option + the color selector to change the shape of your icon. (3) I think legally this counts as fanart, so remember that Tumblr, and all other referential items, belong to their respective creators and very much not me! Non-commercial only.

Thank you so much to the fine folks at @meikerio! Without their platform, this wouldn't be possible!

For my aro siblings 😎

yes hello i would like to emphasize this

disgust is not a moral issue

i mean……….

We are also gonna support the pup players' rights to dress however the fuck they want to, too.

Note. The Pup player in question isn't doing anything inappropriate.

Every other kind of parade has people in costume who are in character many who interact directly with the audience. It would be VERY easy to find a dancer from a Disney parade with an equally revealing costume (note they're masc presenting and only missing a shirt).

Its also just as pressing to remind everyone-

States like Tennessee, Idaho, and Texas are already trying to have Drag catergorized as Sexual in nature. Making it illegal to do drag in public- and with how it's written, non passing Trans people would be considered "drag performers" just for wearing clothes matching their gender.

Along with "Don't say gay" bills, claiming that being queer or talking about queer identities is a "sexual act" and thus can't be done in front of children. Ie. We trying to make it illegal for us to exist in public (esspecially schools)

oh hey ofc @broannalmao is a terf :)

i just want to make it clear that i just blocked about 4 more people for being dipshits on this post and do you know what???

every single one of them was a terf

when we say that 'no kink at pride' is a terf/radfem position, this is what we mean. don't drink the terf koolaid, kids

yeeeep

I’m know I’m not the first person to say this, but any newbies on tumblr really need to understand how different this is from a lot of other social media. Particularly tiktok.

I just saw a creator on tiktok reminding followers that it’s actually a problem when someone goes back to the earliest post and watches all the posts chronologically, liking and commenting along the way. The stupid app recognizes it as spam or something and then kinda puts a halt on their account? Literally punishing people for positive engagement?? 🥴🤦‍♀️

I’ve already heard people saying years back how they don’t want to be “creepy” and go through a persons blog, liking and reblogging tons of stuff. But think how many more people are going to be worried about it now, thinking they might do actual damage! Most people, especially younger people, are so used to the way tiktok works now. So please, do not ever worry about this on here. Just remember-

You will never do any harm if you go on a like and reblog fest through someone’s tumblr blog! The only risk you’re taking is to make the blog owner weep for joy!! 😭🤣

This website literally passes around posts that are so old, the newest comments are celebrating things like “Happy 10th anniversary to this post!” sometimes.

The worst that usually happens is a creator going “wait, what, HOW did you find that 7 year old post that had no tags buried in the depths of my blog?”, very few people actually get mad about it (and from what I’ve seen, the people who do are all entirely immigrants from socmed sites like TT where they have entirely different cultures about it.)

Tumblr itself is based around longevity in many ways.  So, just have at it.  Have fun.  If you like that post 12,000 pages deep on my blog, GO FOR IT.  That’s what this website is all about

You may in fact cause the poster to go “wait! That post. I liked that post.”

please only vote if you identify as being on the aro and ace spectrums. definitions below the cut

April Fool’s Day is in a few days, and I just wanted to make this clear. This blog is safe, and I can promise you no screamers, nothing emotionally abusive, no fake posts, and nothing to intentionally trigger dissociation. You are safe here.

Free Trans Resources public spreadsheet

Please reblog!

As promised in the comments of the binder master list, I'm now compiling a more all-encompassing free resource public spreadsheet! So far I've got resources for binders, packers, STP devices, gaffs/tucking underwear, gender-affirming clothing, some DIY gender-affirming gear, and some resources on how to clean that gear and how to clean up makeup spills. I'll try to keep expanding things, and feel free to request a type of resource or a specific location in the comments or in an ask! (I can't promise I'll be able to find anything, but I'll do my best! <3)

The spreadsheet is called "Study sheet" to make it more inconspicuous in case someone you'd rather didn't catches a glimpse of the title. Do please note that once you're on the spreadsheet it is very obvious what the content is, so only view it when it's safe for you to do so! <3

Before you click on the link to the spreadsheet:

Some links to videos on how to conceal and delete your history for those who need it (blue text indicates a link)

Remember to delete your Youtube history after watching!

*Edit* I've added a new section for miscellaneous resource requests to serve as a semi-temporary place for more niche topics that I get resource requests for. If I get more requests for them or find more resources related to the topic I'll make a new separate section for them, but otherwise they can just stay there.

Remember: y'all can comment, tag, or if you want/need it to be more discreet you can send me an anonymous ask. I may not be able to find what you want, but I won't judge you <3

proud to be aro on this fine tuesday

Hey. You there. Do you not want to be mistaken for a bot, but you've also grown attached to the default icon you got when you signed up? Great news! Worry no longer because now you can customize your very own icon!

Examples:

Usage notes: (1) Due to how the website works, it will struggle in mobile portrait mode. Try viewing the page in landscape or stick to desktop. (2) Use the cube option + the color selector to change the shape of your icon. (3) I think legally this counts as fanart, so remember that Tumblr, and all other referential items, belong to their respective creators and very much not me! Non-commercial only.

Thank you so much to the fine folks at @meikerio! Without their platform, this wouldn't be possible!

AroAces are actually a great supply of power

As we always have double A's

worst relationship status to have w someone is “objectively they’re a fine person who is nice but i don’t enjoy their company as much as they enjoy mine”

second worst relationship status to have with someone is “objectively they’re a fine person but they Bother You”

secret third technically more harmless but in practicality more frustrating relationship status is “objectively they’re a fine person and they like so many of the same things i do but they like them in a fundamentally different way that is harmless but reads wrong to my brain and it has made attempts at forming an actual bond with them aggravating more than anything”

tbh i think stuff like this is why so many people, especially younger people, fall into this trap of “well if i don’t like a person or thing, they must be bad”. it would be so much easier if you could dismiss them as bad and move on. but it’s like, no, Objectively Fine people or things can just not mesh well with you for totally subjective reasons. and sometimes when they’re people you mesh much better with their brain than they do with yours. and sometimes you have to live with that.

“aromantic people wanting to reclaim love, especially non-romantic love, as an important part of their humanity in the face of dehumanisation” and “a lot of aromantic people have been dehumanised and then forced to justify their humanity to people in the name of love, especially non-romantic love, and have thus rejected the idea of needing love at all to be considered fulfilled or even human” are ideas that must co-exist actually

"queerplantonic just means friends" well I dont know about you but if I bought a house with one of my friends, we took each other to visit our families on holidays, sleep in the same bed, and committed to sharing our lives to each other, I believe most people would assume that's a result of romantic feelings.

hence why there is terminology to describe that kind of relationship in the absence of romance. thank you.

A thing about groomer discourse ya’ll really need to fucking understand

is that neither the threat we queers pose, nor the accusations made against us are actually about harming children.

We are a danger because the existence of queerness threatens the monopoly of violence adults have over children under a patriarchal hegemony, which is then twisted into rhetoric about harming children, and the accusation made as a response is that by harming children we must be sexual perverts and therefore worthy of being cast out. It’s 100% circular, harm to children is only a middle stage to make it sound palatable to more people. The idea of a class of groomers who are out to abuse your precious widdle kids serves to make the loud part quiet that is “if those people exist, we will lose the monopoly of violence over young people.”

There is no groomers here. They are a rhetorical trick made up in the same way as stranger danger, pedo panic and the lavender scare.

Going “no, you are the groomer” does nothing but validate these dogwhistles and integrate the ideas of sexuality as abuse and abuse as shorthand for sexuality into our own understanding of youth and sexuality and boy lemme tell you, this don’t end well.