@arderconfuria

soft bby
Me to my friends: “Yes sweetie! Eat whatever you want! Fuck society’s standards! You’re gorgeous the way you are!! 💖😍🙏”
Me @ myself: “fucking starve u ugly bitch 😷💀”

Happened today

same

Wanna know what having anorexia is really like?

*sleeping as much as possible to keep yourself from binging *drinking so much green tea or coffee on an empty stomach that your hands shake *pushing on your stomach to stop the growling *exercising until your legs feel weak *peeing 40 times a day *weighing yourself daily *having to say no to foods you once loved *hiding your illness from family/boyfriend/friends *choking on giant vitamins *wearing jackets in the summer because you’re always cold *always being covered in bruises *binging when you’re alone… *…and then trying to puke or shit the guilt away *staring at thinspo literally 24/7 *crying when the number on the scale just won’t move no matter how long you fast *feeling guiltily proud of all your symptoms

👼🏻

it sucks but i deserve this