I feel like we should talk about this more
What's a little cannibalism between friends? Between Aegir*?
I do like how this also means that, due to Highmore's lingering doubts making her unable to truly let go of her humanity and go full Seaborn, her human form was actually encased at the center of all that Flying Jellyfish monster form... So, basically, during moments of stress or self-doubt, it could just grow again, since it's technically part of her actual physiology now. Mizuki had to actually perform the first act of in-universe Arknights peeling in order to 'retrieve' Highmore. Conversely, Highmore is the first canonically peeled Operator in the game.
And if it grows again, well, that simply means we get free BBQ.
Regardless of whether the source of the meal agrees with it or not.
i will forever be obsessed with this tweet. what if DE was about nothing. cottage core isnt white enough for me i need small german village in the alps core.
tumblr developers cranking it into overdrive to make sure one of the few unique and usable social media sites remaining becomes a half-formed failed homunculus clone of tiktok like every other fucking website
Demons: We need to make an antichrist
Demons: Hey random religious virgin living in christianized medieval Britain we’re going to impregnate you with the antichrist. Do not under any circumstances baptize him.
The virgin: Hey a demon impregnated me please baptize this demon baby
Priest: Okay. *dunks baby Merlin in the baptismal font*
Baby Merlin: *no longer a demon*
Demons: No! Who could have seen this coming???
Uther Pendragon: Hey I wanna have sex with an already married woman. I want you to disguise me as her husband. You’re like a demon right? You’ll be fine with doing that.
Merlin: No I’m just a human with vaguely defined magical powers.
Merlin: But I’m still not immune to The Drama. Let’s do it.
Merlin: Hey girl
Lady of the lake: No thank you
Merlin: Oh come on please
Lady of the lake: I said no
Merlin: I’m a nice guy I promise
Lady of the lake: *seals him into an oak tree*
*later*
King Arthur: Hey has anyone seen Merlin lately?
Lady of the lake: Hmm. Must’ve just dropped out of the narrative. Tragic.
He’s still there btw
If anyone on the isle of Great Britain cuts down a tree in their backyard and a horny old man in medieval clothing falls out, don’t panic. It’s just a failed antichrist. See if he speaks Welsh.
my friend asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend because her parents are homophobic af but they ended up hating me so much that they were glad when she said she was gay task failed successfully
okay so
- be a goth. conservative christian parents don't approve of goth men. show up to their house wearing all kinds of satanic symbols if you can
- know more about religion than the parents. they'll try to introduce you to christianity because you don't exactly look like a christian but your dad's an ex priest and has a phd in theology so *cracks knuckles* you'll correct them on every little mistake they make
- call your fake girlfriend every annoying petname under the sun. i'm talking about babu, shmoopie, snuffleupagus. when you run out of annoying english terms of endearment call her shit like "my liver" or "my little cabbage" (actual greek terms of endearments but the parents won't know this they'll just think you're annoying :3)
- to continue this, talk to your fake girlfriend in the most high pitched annoying voice possible but talk in your regular voice to everyone else
stare at her older brother's ass for just a little too long- have an annoying laugh. think of sybil fawlty but a stereotypical villain playing a church organ in his castle
- let them quote bible verses to you. then ask "so when were those two destroyed for sodomy?". it's very funny to do this when judas kisses jesus, and it's even funnier when you've just corrected them over a minor mistake in church history
- ask WHY abraham was begging for sodom. it doesn't make sense to you why a good christian man would go and beg for tha-
- be over possessive of your fake gf (dont really do this, it's just an act)
go and fuck her brother in an alleyway.the parents won't know about this so it's an optional step- use words no one knows the meaning of. do this without realising because you always talk like that
- just be yourself! that's enough on its own to make them despise you tbh
yes
momowatcher
Best sticker
newturkdad
Freakin’ awesome. We live in anaheim so our boys got to enjoy the all-access Disneyland Daily pass. Our youngest (Tanner) wanted to be an officer. Unfortunately he was too small for the restraints on splash mountain so when the coaster sped up it flung him out and he skidded about 200 feet on the asphalt. Here’s what we’re keeping him in right now:
Disney won’t let us bury on park grounds because of a potential copyright issue with the superman thing.
We miss him a lot, but there’s a cancellation fee on the Daily pass, so we’ve been making the most of it. His brother still enjoys the park and since we chose not to press charges, we’re entitled to one free mickey pancake a day
??? Reading that looked like you tried to copy abd paste 3 differint stories together to make us not realise you just copied and pasted??
First of all: splash mountain is a water log ride. There are no places where it just…speeds…up? Its a fucking water log ride???
BECAUSE its a water log ride it DOESNT HAVE RESTRAINTS….it DOES however have a minimum height requirment of 46 inches to ride the ride, so EVEN IF this kid was too small, they WOULD NOT let them ride.
There is no asphault anywhere near the track itself. The CLOSEST you could come is the big drop at rhe end but again, minimum height requirement of 46 inches tall to ride, the angle of the drop and the speed at which you go it is physically impossible to get ‘launched’.
I feel like this is obvious but theres so much obviously wrong about the second addition i suppose i need to state this.
SUPERMAN. ISNT. DISNEY. Superman is DC. The only theme parks that have licenced DC character based rides is six flags.
Six flags, another park that HAS MINIMUM HEIGHT REQUIREMENTS for rides.
That has restraints on rides in which are necesary. Which again, YOU CANNOT RIDE IF YOU DO NOT MEET THE SAFETY GUILDLINES.
Go try to shitpost and ruin the reputation of a differint park, will you? At least make sure your story is even plausable before you open your mis-informed mouth.
newturkdad
@crabwalker Are you seriously explaining to me how Splash Mountain works? Do you think I don’t remember how my son died? Oh, and it’s “physically impossible to get launched?” Guess what, asshole? My SON got launched. This is the last photo we have of him.
You’ve said some cruel things to me, but I’m going to be the bigger person. I’ll be praying, for your sake, that nobody in your family ever gets launched.
certified iconic post
JJSSJSISII8828/8/8/8/88/77/7$-!1?:!./&&/‘amman!??
shrexy
easy pete you son of a bitch, there isn’t a sign on this earth that could deliver you from my fury
jdlaclede
i never stop laughing at this fucking post
legitimately one of the funniest videos in earth
Happy Pride Month!
Anonymous asked:
"Lappland is the best Silence user in the game". Bullshit, Joyce uses Silence at least three times per week.