I truly believe I was put on this earth to give head, go for long walks, eat pasta, and appreciate pretty things.

gouger and gougita

e bugs

she said this to RuPaul

“food’s ready come downst-”

heard u were talkin shit

What just happened.

what the fuck

I thought this was going to be deep, but then

Museum security guard 1: Wait, did you hear something?

Museum security guard 2: Yeah, I think it came from the gift shop.

Me, who broke into the museum and had already stolen dozens of priceless artifacts but decided to stop by the gift shop to score a snow globe:

This is oddly specific.

I could be ur angel… or ur devil

How could I possibly choose

PENIS GNOMES ARRIVE

NEEDLESS TO SAY THIS IS A PROBLEM

mcsnatched