I still think that my favorite urban legend/folklore fact is that there are certain areas in New Orleans where you cannot get a taxi late at night not because it isn’t safe, but because taxi companies have had recurring problems of picking up ghosts in those areas who are not aware that they are dead and disappearing from the cab before reaching the destination and therefore stiffing the driver on the fare causing a loss for the company.

An occupational hazard of cab driving I had not previously considered

I love that the nola problem here is not “ghosts in my taxi cab,” but “ghosts are FUCKING BROKE DEAD BASTARDS & I GOT BILLS”

Horror is when ghosts get into cabs and scare drivers Magical realism is when cab companies have to develop policies to prevent ghastly fare-theft

In a book about the tsunami in Japan in 2011, the writer talked about how there was a huge increase in reports of ghostly activity. Apparently in Japan treating ghosts rudely is basically considered the stupidest thing you could possibly do. For months after the tsunami, taxi drivers would pick up a passenger only to have them give an address in one of the devastated areas. The cab driver often looked up halfway to the destination to find their fare had disappeared. Not wanting to be impolite to the person (even if they were dead) they’d drive to the address, open the door to let them out, then drive away.

Yeah this all checks out

Please spread the word.

I have a lot of feelings on how indigenous groups who didn’t build permanent structures like cities aren’t seen as being as sophisticated as ones who built large cities, without accounting for the fact that maybe it’s in our values systems to leave as light of a footprint as possible and it’s important that our structures are easily taken down or fade with the passage of time because it’s easier on the landscape, but ya know.

This made me think of the story one of my Coast Salish acquaintances tells of how her family would travel from the Puget Sound up Mt. Rainier every year and, sure, following herds but also they had berry bushes and trees and prairies (with camas is the one she always talks about but I’m sure other foods) that were in the care of specific families so they also followed the plants through the year. They cultivated and cared for them, not just coming to gather and move on to the unknown. They came back and to the same places, the same plants and trees every year.

I think a lot of people mistake what a huge connection that is to land and territory. They hear “nomadic” and dismiss it without realizing. It doesnt mean you dont have roots in the area. It means your roots are so ingrained in the area outsiders dont even see them there.

!!!!!

I’m actually writing about this right now, this old human concept I think of as caretaker agriculture

I tell the story of a group of prehistoric nomads that do little things as they pass along a regular route – fell a tree to let the berry bushes get more light, pull out a few kinds of shrubs and burn all those seeds so there’s less competition, dig a shallow trench from the beaver pond to the low meadow. Uproot the trees that only bear a little fruit and leave the over achievers to propagate. Little things as they pass each year, until their route becomes a luscious garden in an orchard of plenty; which, btw, is what colonizers describe finding in parts of the Americas, and in other places around the world.

They take similar care of with the herd they follow. They know the members of the herd very well. The herd has a bull these last few years that is especially caring and protective, keeps the calves safe and doesn’t cause disturbances among the cows, so they will be hunting mostly young bulls that want to challenge him for a few seasons, let such a great old bull father as many calves as possible. In past seasons they hunted cows that that have ignored their calves to ruinous results or started trouble among the herd. In the spring and summer they almost do not hunt at all among the beasts they follow, letting the herd have its calves and raise them. Anyway, that is a time when there is much available for humans to eat. When they pass through the wolves’ territory, they sacrifice two or three large adults and leave them, so the calves are not preyed on, saving maybe ten young lives. Old Ursa on the hill can have whatever she takes, who wants to stop her? She usually only takes one or two in any case, and she’s fresh out of hibernation with cubs to feed. Her father was a menace and in the old days they would sacrifice one and leave it just to keep him from coming too near. In the winter, there is less food for humans and less food for the herd. Hunting among the herd at this time helps ensure those that remain have plenty to eat during the scarcity of the coldest months. And after all, many more calves have reached adulthood under the care of the people than would have otherwise, the herd can spare some now. No one comes close to starvation this way, humans and herd beasts alike come through the winter in good health.

Anyway, yeah, caretaker agriculture is an amazing and ancient agriculture technique that is in many ways greater and more impressive than having farms and ranches, and something colonizing cultures never really recognized as even existing.

can you imagine how freaky shark mermaids would be like unlike sharks, shark mermaids would have actual arms/hands and could rely on touching things with their hands to see if they’re prey rather than having to bite like sharks do. like youre just swimming in the ocean and suddenly you feel a strong grip on your leg, you freak the FUCK out because uh what????? the fuck??? youre swimming alone in the ocean??

a head pops out of the water, dorsal fin pointed from its back and it just points at you and says in a low whisper: “i thought you were a seal. please dont swim alone like this, im sorry i scared you i just wanted to see what you are” and then disappears back into the depth. what the fuck.

no come back ma’am

*under my breath* underwater girlfriend

underwater wife

Underwater love of my underwater life

The only thing you check for is if someone else already asked for PTO in the same slot. That’s it.

My department fell apart 2 weeks ago when I took my PTO. we were already short handed, someone quit at the start of the week, and there was literally nobody to even call in to cover, so they were fucked. But that’s on corporate for refusing to hire enough people. That’s on corporate for thinking we need no overlap in our shifts, no midday people . That’s not my fault that I needed a specific week off, or even if I just WANTED it off. Businesses know what they need to do, it’s not on me to make things easy for a billion dollar corporation that doesn’t even give a shit about my store.

Word of advice kids: Don’t take workplace advice from someone who uses Scrooge McDuck lighting a cigar with a bank note as their user icon.

THE CHILLS ALL OVER MY BODY

Actual goddess

Unmute !

regret.mp4

“OH RIGHT HE WAS A WRESTLER”

invader zim filmed this

Y’all these are the actors who are in the Spongebob Squarepants broadway musical that Plankton trying to knock down Spongebob

that context makes is 10000X funnier

That’s Sandy Cheeks laughing in the background

This show was the funniest fucking thing

He never elaborated on this and it kills me

If I remember correctly it eventually got out.

Apparently this was a rehearsal for the scene, so the extinguisher was a prop one (hence the moment Miranda sassy looks at the camera/crew for how he was acting her in panic), so they went on to it.

But someone had switched the extinguisher to the actual fire thrower that would be used on the scene (I dont remember if was proposital or not or simply a mistake because they were meant to be identical).

So this is their actual reaction, cause when he pressed the valve, he really wasnt expecting to fire come out, neither was Miranda, so their reaction is 100% genuine and they did freak out as on tape.

The thing went out so well they were unable to reenact their reactions or surprise as the first time on rehearsal, so the rehearsal scene was kept and put it into the actual episode.

Are you telling me Miranda was eating that carrot with whip cream for fun and not because the scene called for it.

The key shortcut of "windows key" and "." held together has changed my life

like

emoji access? supremely powerful 🙂💖

But

Kaomoji ?

The year is 2013 and I am unstoppable ヾ(•ω•`)o o(*￣▽￣*)ブo(*°▽°*)o

this has been an interesting weekend

They literally moved best actor to the last category over best fucking picture to capitalize on the tragic death of the frontrunner but then not only did that frontrunner NOT win it went to the one guy in the category who didn’t go to the ceremony

Wanna clarify that this post is less abt who deserved to win and more about ABC/the academy blatantly using Chadwick Boseman’s death as a ratings booster and then looking like fools when their greed blew up in their faces

Apparently Anthony Hopkins’ reps begged the academy to let him attend via zoom instead of going to one of the designated oscar gathering spots since A. He’s high risk for COVID and B. His father just passed and he wanted to be with his family and they said no??

Important to add:

ON TOP OF WHICH,

Every day I learn more buffoonery

ok but if bruce wayne somehow came upon zuko fresh out of banishment he would lose his mind.

black hair? check. bad parent(s)? check. trauma? double check.

bruce: how’d you get your scar?

zuko: my dad got mad at me for saying that killing people is wrong so he lit my face on fire and banished me.

bruce, vibrating with excitement, already pulling adoption papers from his utilility: that’s terrible. how do you feel about capes.

Zuko: Do you mind if I wear this blue demon mask?

Bruce: *sniff, tear in his eye* Not at all.

*Zuko fighting the Joker*

J: "wan na kno w h ow i go t thes e sc ar s"

Z: *rips off mask* i don't give a fuck

I’m still stuck at the “batman has adoption papers in his utility belt”.

“Quick, it’s time to use the Bat-adoption papers!”

Bat-option papers

Okay, but you’re missing the best part of this.

Alfred and Iroh complimenting each other on tea while they discuss their overly dramatic children.

iroh: once, i told zuko that he needs to work on his inter turmoil. he screamed at me that he had no such inner turmoil, and then proceeded to go to a cliff during a thunderstorm to scream at God to strike him with lightning

alfred: master bruce and i have that interaction at least three times per week.

@absentlyabbie​

I see your "Alfred and Iroh as tea bros" and raise you "Alfred and Iroh as tea rivals"

Consider

(later)

excellent addition

hey bruce spent a lot of his bat-study abroad in the far east and has kind of a weeb weapon collection so proposal, what if Bruce appreciates Iroh’s tea

while Zuko is enthusiastic about cream and sugar

further fueling their dad-figures’ passive-aggressive rivalry?

You had me at Zuko vs. Joker, I was crying by the Eastern vs. Western tea service

Wait a minute. Batman and Zuko have the same arch-nemesis.

Mark Hamill

Saw the last comment and my brain would not rest until it happened

this post has everything

this was an enjoyable ride. i liked the scenery very much. smooth suspension, nice height, several fascinating loops. 10/10 would go again.

Ya’ll be like “Shang was having a bi freak out, realizing he was into Ping”. NO HE WASN’T. He already knew he was into men. His bisexual freak out was when he realized Ping was Mulan and hey maybe he’s into girls too whatdoya know?

Legit you think a bi man who has always been in such a male-dominated space like the army hadn’t already figured out that he liked men? Come oooonnnn… It’s women he has rarely had contact with and has no idea how to talk to or flirt with (you fight good) I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL.

In “A Girl Worth Fighting For” Shang has zero lines I REST MY FUCKING CASE.

I am Looking at these tags my guy

[ID: Screenshot of tags that read:

ppl don’t like to imagine bi ppl coming to terms with being bi after identifying as gay bc they think that’s a downgrade lol. That’s why there’s like 100000 stories about cishets realizing they were bi and like 2 of gay ppl realizing they were bi.

:END ID]

The absolute Madness and Glee in that neighbour's laugh. Priceless.

This is a fucking amazing joke

Sorry for repost but this is an important addition… the above comment said 500 yen is 5 bucks

jngl;kjdnfgl;skdgh