I wake up every morning, wanting to escape my life and my mistakes

i'm going down and you have watched me drown

They say follow your heart, but if my heart is in a million pieces, Which piece should i follow?

When People Ask How I'm Doing

I want to say,

My depression is an angry deity, a jealous god a thirsty shadow that wrings my joy like a dishrag and makes juice out of my smile.

I want to say,

Getting out of bed has become a magic trick. I am probably the worst magician I know

I want to say,

This sadness is the only clean shirt I have left and my washing machine has been broken for months

But I'd rather not ruin someone's day with my tragic honesty. So instead I treat myself like a pumpkin

I pretend that it's Halloween. I carve it into something acceptable. I laugh and I say,

"I'm doing alright."