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Garbage

@angel-ani / angel-ani.tumblr.com

My gf made me replace my description.
Lea, this pussy cucumber is for you.

I had a thought "instead of gendered bathrooms: bathrooms based on your entity alignment" and it sort of spiraled into uh

Dread powers as offputting bathroom/toilet pics

The Eye:

The Spiral:

The Hunt (bit of a stretch, this one was hard):

The Flesh:

The Lonely:

The Vast:

The Buried:

The Stranger:

The Corruption:

The Dark:

(continued in reblog)

We know that Facebook is brainscorching your parents and tiktok is brainscorching your cousins, but some of you refuse to admit that you got your brain scorched here. However unlike those sites there isn't an algorithm here you just make bad choices.

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my kitty cat was wandering around going ‘mrrph?” so i was like “in here!” he goes “mrrph!” shoves open my bedroom door with his big round head and FLOPS on me. as in hard enough that he made a little “oof” noise when he did it. followed by a category five purring event. there’s good in this world mr frodo etc

An observation:

In Swansea, when you get on a bus, the driver will literally sit at that bus stop and block the traffic if need be to watch you, hawk-like, on the bus cameras as you make your way to a seat. This is normal service. We must all be seated before the bus takes off. Very occasionally they might start driving while you're still standing in front of your seat, having reached it but not quite sat down, and the sudden inertia makes you instantly hinge 90 degrees at the hips and collapse into the chair like a doll in Toy Story when a human enters. We all have a good laugh. "Quick off the mark, isn't he?" an old lady will say. "Not even sitting, you weren't!" she will cackle. This is high entertainment. Her week is made. Your forced seating is a rare treat, a moment of human connection. You still thank the driver as you get off the bus.

In Edinburgh, the bus drivers have never heard of the very concept of waiting until the passengers are seated. Half a picosecond after your card is tapped the bus driver punches a nitro injection button and stamps on the accelerator. You are instantly hurled to the back of the bus, where you are thinly laminated to the back window. Time unspools into the traffic behind you. A local tuts at you, because you should have known to hold the handrail. After several seconds you manage to unpeel yourself, only for the driver to slam on the brakes for the next stop, flinging you at speed through the windscreen and onto the road in front of the bus. Ashamed, you get up and re-board. It costs nothing extra, because Scottish public transport is cheap and convenient. The driver actually pauses, because a woman with a cane has boarded. You seize your chance. You try to run up the stairs to a seat before she sits and the bus moves again. You are out of luck - at the top step the driver spins out into oncoming traffic at 87 miles an hour from a standstill, and you tumble like a house of cards impacted by a bowling ball, thrown down from the Olympus of the upper deck that you, in your hubris, thought you could reach. You rattle around in the aisle like a discarded can. The woman with the cane laughs at you. Some children kick you towards the back. You lodge under a seat, and cling on until your stop like a terrestrial limpet.

You still thank the driver as you get off the bus.

No, kids should not have unsupervised acess to the internet.   Yes, I got that and it was the best thing that ever happened to me.    Its a paradox.

It’s not a paradox – it’s a different net.

When we were kids, the internet was a sandbox-style open world – full of dangerous things, yes, but also nearly unlimited potential – and we learned to be careful, and we learned fast, and we learned fairly well.

Now, the internet is a series of black box silos built by corporations to maximize engagement at the expense of everything else.

I may have seen Two Girls One Cup by accident and at the tender age of ten, but I never had to deal with companies using gambling-addiction-creating strategies pioneered in literal casinos to try and make me hand over hundreds of real dollars at the same age. I may have been exposed to vicious bigotry in anonymous and pseudanonymous messages boards, but I never had algorithms spoonfeeding me explicitly far right radicalizing content. The blithely unfettered access people of our generation had is just genuinely not the same as what kids with unsupervised access are getting today.

Tbh "shit idiot brain fungus" is a really good way to think of toxic ideologies.

1) It can sit inside your brain without anyone noticing for a while.

2) You can get it from other people, or infectious materials. (That can be safely handled with the proper knowledge and precautions)

3) You can cure it, but scrubbing all the fungus out is uncomfortable, invasive, time consuming, and often requires multiple dedicated people supporting the person getting scrubbed.

4) Longer it's been in there, harder it is to scrub out.

5) You can do everything right, and still get infected with a mild case every once in a while. That's okay! Happens to the best of us. You scrub your brain out and move on.

6) If someone wants their shit idiot brain fungus cured, you wanna be nice and scrub it without hurting them if possible.

7) Sometimes people love their shit idiot brain fungus. They think it's great, they were already bullying trans people on the internet, and the fungus helps them do that without sleeping. These people are assholes.

For those who aren’t getting the brilliance- this couple (?) is streaming World of Warcraft and I think are dressed up as their characters. Two normal sized people, one of whom is playing a dwarf. And who takes it upon himself to pretend to be too short to just get off his chair and then, aware that his SO also has her camera going, proceeds to walk across the frame on his knees to give the illusion that he’s actually that short.

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Land Before Time motivates a proper diet 🍃🍃🍃

everyone had a phase as a kid where they wanted to eat random leafs off of trees and land before time is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT responsible for this phenomenon

Both of these responses radiate terrifying energy, but on different wavelengths.

Finding out the fae are parasitic fungi, huh.

Wander into a fairy circle, just a circle of mushrooms, come back different from that. Wonder what happened there? Got mushrooms in the brain didn't they?

Wander into the woods, eat strange food drink strange water, see a strange world, keep going back to the woods for more and why has this happened, what enslaved them? Brain fungus isn't it?

They don't live in this world do they, they speak to each other in strange tongues, flit across the world invisibly, appear in many illusionary forms.

We built our world over top of theirs.

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What I’d give for one of the Cinderella remakes to go into how when you’re in an isolated and abusive situation, sometimes you need to be saved and you’re not weak if you can’t escape by yourself

I’ve never been a fan of bad faith reinterpretations of fairy tales, especially ones which flatten the originals into “princesses is saved by a prince and nothing else”, to then go #girlboss. The princess can save herself because she’s a strong female character! (Implying if you’re in a bad situation, it’s because you’re not strong enough to get out)

#okay this is genius#I love this#love at first sight is a tough sell#but ‘I just met you but you are so clearly in desperate need of help that I am already planning where to hide the bodies’#is a trope I absolutely love#going from hello to ride or die in a matter of hours#isn’t a ‘you’re hot’ thing#it’s a ‘my fellow human is trapped and suffering and every instinct I have is screaming its need to help’ thing

I think it's so funny how we bred JOBS into dogs. I have two shih tzus and they were bred to be lap dogs. All they care about is looking cute and cuddling with people. Meanwhile my grandma has a border collie and that dog needs to feel so useful all the time, he acts like he will pass away if he doesn't have a job to do constantly

The thoughts of my shih tzus: Man I love the couch. Flip flops are so yummy. I wish it was nap time again

The thoughts of my grandma's border collie: I have been silently observing the pigeons up in the tree for 3 hours in order to gain every tactical advantage. I'm trying to engineer the optimal jump into the backyard pool. I wish I could play chess

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I still think that my favorite urban legend/folklore fact is that there are certain areas in New Orleans where you cannot get a taxi late at night not because it isn’t safe, but because taxi companies have had recurring problems of picking up ghosts in those areas who are not aware that they are dead and disappearing from the cab before reaching the destination and therefore stiffing the driver on the fare causing a loss for the company.

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An occupational hazard of cab driving I had not previously considered

I love that the nola problem here is not “ghosts in my taxi cab,” but “ghosts are FUCKING BROKE DEAD BASTARDS & I GOT BILLS

Horror is when ghosts get into cabs and scare drivers Magical realism is when cab companies have to develop policies to prevent ghastly fare-theft

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In a book about the tsunami in Japan in 2011, the writer talked about how there was a huge increase in reports of ghostly activity. Apparently in Japan treating ghosts rudely is basically considered the stupidest thing you could possibly do. For months after the tsunami, taxi drivers would pick up a passenger only to have them give an address in one of the devastated areas. The cab driver often looked up halfway to the destination to find their fare had disappeared. Not wanting to be impolite to the person (even if they were dead) they’d drive to the address, open the door to let them out, then drive away.

Yeah this all checks out