🧃

'While once undisputed apex predators in the Therocene, the shrarks have gradually become displaced by various predatory marine hamsters as time went on. This is not to say that the shrarks are a dying clade: on the contrary, they continue to flourish in a vast array of almost a hundred different species, none quite as big as the megaprawns of the Therocene seas, but much more diverse and trending on smaller and more agile hunters that dwell in reefs, open seas, and abyssal depths alike. The most widespread of them, the silver reefshrark (Argentocarcharocaris zigra), still grows to lengths of up to a meter long, and is armed with a saw-toothed rostrum and pincer-like fore-claws that mimic a set of jaws for seizing prey, which includes shrish, pescopods, skwoids, searrels and marine rattiles.

In response to this widespread predator's armaments, many marine rattiles in turn have developed varied defenses in order to defend themselves, such as being faster swimmers, developing offensive weapons or being well-armored. Perhaps the most heavily-defended of them is the geartooth seashingle (Odontochelonimys daiei), a specialized mockjelly-eater which, in addition to its namesake multi-cusped teeth that it uses to catch its soft, jelly-like prey, sports a pair of modified teeth on its lower jaw in males, which they use to joust over territory. The loss of mammary glands in rattiles and the secondary re-evolution of parental care in various lineages has then thrust the role of doting parent onto the male geartooths. When threatened by reefshrarks, young geartooths instinctively huddle underneath their father's underbelly, while he spins and rotates his body to always present his armored back in spite of whichever direction the reefshrark attacks: his carapace, made from multiple separate pieces of horn-like keratin, is not only durable and resistant to injury--but is also rounded in a flattened dome-like shape that is both hydrodynamic and difficult to gain a firm grasp on, with sharp bites harmlessly sliding off. In addition to defense, their tusk-like lower teeth can inflict serious wounds onto an attacker, able to pierce a reefshrark's tough chitinous exoskeleton.'

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Here it is, folks. The entire kiss in one GIF. We all wanted Neil Gaiman to give us an A/C kiss and he said you can have it, but it’ll cost you everything

Stab me it would hurt less

these are COSMIC ENTITIES!!!!!!! who CREATED THE STARS AND GALAXIES!!!!!! and they have a little I WAS WRONG DANCE!!!!!!

ohhh "why dont you wait inside? you like waiting inside" everything about this scene has got me clawing at my insides, aziraphale is so fond, crowley spends enough time at the bookshop waiting for aziraphale, just, around while aziraphale is around, waiting for aziraphale, he gets up to ??? something??? he likes waiting inside. he lounges. he sits like hes never heard of what shape a chair should be while waiting for aziraphale. what the fuck are his hobbies.

mentally i’m still here

Sad boi pep talk time

THE vibe for the reunion in season 3

Ennon, son of Job, somehow out-homo'd every person in a movie about mushy sapphics, a gay romantic confession, and a dude full-on kissing another dude.

Cheers.🍷

okay actually one last thing. i do not believe coffee theory. i do not like coffee theory. i think coffee theory misses key parts of aziraphale’s character, which is how desperately he believes that heaven is good, and how badly he wants heaven’s approval even after six thousand years of never getting it. metatron didn’t need to put something in aziraphale’s coffee. he just needed to say the right thing. he just needed to make aziraphale think crowley would come with him, knowing full well that crowley wouldn’t and therefore taking away the one person that would keep aziraphale from going. he just needed to separate them, and then aziraphale was heaven’s. and that’s exactly what he did.

I find it hysterical that the headcanon that ineffable bureaucracy would take the shortest possible amount of time to fall in love, figure that out, and get together while our ineffable husbands take 6,000+ years to even get close to talking about their feelings is now canon.

lil wip :)

So this is what's finally going to make me actually learn how to spell bureaucracy huh

idiots

and here comes the angel of thursday on a monday morning with the steel chair

In the beginning

Aziraphale’s raised eyebrow when shax says “you don’t seem his type at all” tells me aziraphale KNOWS he’s crowley’s type he has suspected it for a very long time he’s just afraid to take that final step

Okay not to make light of The Finale but I'll take one "I was wrong" dance off of Aziraphale's sentence if his High Archangel outfit REALLY slaps. Do you remember the Catholicism-themed Met Gala. Yeah. <3

what the angel said was: "I saw you at your happiest when heaven was still good. i want to return heaven to what it once was so i can see you happy again, demon." but what the demon understood was: "you are a demon, you are neither holy nor good and i don't want you the way you are. i'd prefer heaven over you."

+ Bonus, the one time it mattered most