kaz’s speech to pekka rollins though I mean that was peak bastard of the barrel shit like go off my little emo king tell me more

shadow and bone really said “im gonna give you the crows you deserve this season” and they did, in all their cutthroat, dramatic, angsty glory

So here’s all my thoughts on the teen wolf movie. This will contain spoilers.

- I’ll start by saying Derek and Eli carried this movie. They were the most interesting dynamic and the characters you feel drawn to the most.

- I do really like Eli, i think he’s pretty funny but he’s very Stiles-coded and I do wonder if that’s partly the reason why so many people like him. He’s definitely there to provide the comedic relief which he did a really good job of.

- The plot holes are prevalent from the start. First of all, why is the nogitsune remains or whatever they are in Japan with Hikari and Liam when at the end of season 3, it’s mentioned that Argent and Isaac are taking them to France and burying them. Also the nogitsune becoming a fox/wolf hybrid makes no sense because we were told in 3b that he can’t be both.

- There’s absolutely no mention of who Eli’s mother is. He’s 15 so he was born around the time Allison died according to their timeline so like who’s the mom? It just doesn’t make sense and it’s so glossed over.

- I don’t care for Scott and Allison’s relationship. I didn’t at the time of the show and I still don’t, they were each others first love, sure, but they weren’t right for each other imo. It just seemed like a whole lotta nonsense just to get them back together again.

- Speaking of relationships, so many of the couples from the show were split up in this movie with absolutely no reason as to why they broke up. Argent and Melissa’s breakup has no explanation, the same with Scott and Malia. We do get an explanation for Stiles and Lydia but its such a fucking dumb one. I don’t know why they spent 6 seasons building that relationship only to break them up because Lydia was having nightmares about Stiles.

- Again on the subject of couples, Malia and Parrish was so left field like it came out of nowhere and for what? Because of the lack of relationship development between them, i ended up not giving a shit about them. The same with Liam and Hikari, we don’t see the connection build between them so why would we care for their relationship? The lack of substance gave us nothing to work with.

- I do like Hikari but she is just used as a plot device. She’s there to dump information on us about certain things and she’s there to aid in helping Scott fake his death by lending him her foxfire (which by the way what the fuck? There’s no explanation of how that’s possible). There’s no personal character development there for her which is a shame because kitsunes and the mythology behind them is so interesting. She had a lot of potential as a character but Jeff clearly forgot to give her a personality.

- Liam is barely in this movie even though he’s a main character. Like it truly felt like a cameo appearance. He has no relevance to the storyline. Even when Scott was supposedly dying, they didn’t even cut to Liam’s reaction once even though he’s Scott’s first bitten beta. Like as a character that’s pretty popular, he deserved more screen time

- Mason and Liam don’t have a single proper interaction even though they’re best friends.

- Lydia and Allison have like maybe two scenes at most together. Which like wtf? They went through so much together and yet they didn’t think it important enough to give them more screen time together.

- They did Derek super dirty. We follow Derek through this journey of trying to connect with Eli and trying to help him transform and the second their ‘conflict’ is resolved, they have Derek die right in front of his son. Also Derek’s eyes turn red right before he burns to a crisp but that doesn’t matter right? bc two seconds later he’s gonna die anyway.

- You could take out the entire nogitsune storyline and the movie would pretty much be the same. Also the mystery hooded figure is so lame I can’t even begin to explain how entirely underwhelming that was.

- Peter is very season 1 peter again for some reason. Jackson is just kinda there, again to try and provide some comedic relief. Should of sacrificed one of these two honestly

- I just feel like they ignored so many of the things that made the show great. The friendships, the comedy, the relationships and let’s be honest, the cheesiness of it all. Characters that we know and love felt super bland to me. All the things that made the characters feel fleshed out and likable was missing.

- lastly and most importantly, they didn’t use the teen wolf theme song for the opening credits. Absolutely criminal.

do i wanna post a rant about the teen wolf movie or do i just wanna pretend like it never happened, idk